Runaway Trains

I know, I know...it's been a while. I've been kind of avoiding blogging because it means I have to confront and acknowledge my feelings. Lol. I'm not really sure where to start. I've been super busy the last couple months with work, which hasn't left a lot of room for dating, or anything like that.
But in regards to my those feelings I've been avoiding... it's Jamie. We've been talking a lot more lately. I mean we have been keeping in touch, but kind of just sporadically. But over the last couple months, our communication has become much more frequent. We talk almost every day now. And a couple months ago he was talking about coming back to NOLA in the new year, so I offhandedly suggested he come the first week of February and be my date to Bethany's wedding. At first he was like, "Well isn't that kind of a big deal?" And I was like, "HA! No. As many weddings as I have to go to?" Then we laughed and I mentioned how it would be fun - dressing up, open bar, dancing, and of course having him for arm candy lol. And he basically said he'd be delighted to go with me. Of course at the time, it was still kind of a ways off and I didn't really expect him to commit to something like that right then and there. But it's come up twice more since, and he still says he wants to go with me. And then today he told me there's a restructuring going on at his work, and he may be transferred, promoted or laid off. Most likely promoted, but he still may have to move to another city. Anyway, he's going to let me know about the wedding by the weekend. So hopefully I'll know for sure by then!
The other thing is, a lot of the times our conversations begin with him telling me he's thinking of me and he's lonely/horny. Lol. But lately, our conversations have been more about life, and and stuff he likes and stuff I like, and funny stories about our past and our families... Today he even let me pick out a suit for him! He's going to buy it next month lol. And he asked me about my past relationships. That felt kind of like...we crossed over into some new territory. And there was something else he said...I have to go back and find it.

"I mean New Orleans is my favourite place, the food, culture, music, I love the Saints, despite the rain today your weather's pretty amazing and then there's this extremely beautiful girl there who's offering to tie me up..."

Lol, about the tying up, I said I wished he could come watch TV in bed with me and he said he didn't think he'd be able to watch the TV if he was in bed with me, so I said I'd just have to tie him up. Haha. Of course that led to some sexy talk.
But anyway...I don't know what this is exactly, and I'm not naive enough to believe he doesn't pursue girls across the pond, or date, or fuck, or whatever, but it feels like something. We've never actually really said anything about our feelings towards each other, other than physical attraction, and fun.
But when he comes back, because I know he will, weather he goes with me to the wedding or not, we are going to see each other and sparks are going to fly, and I'm not going to be able to pretend this is just a friendly casual thing anymore. I'm afraid it will turn into another Lane situation and that left me totally wrecked...
I'm still willing to risk it though, because I feel like, if I fell for him, and he fell for me, and the stars aligned and all that crap, I would move to England to be with him in a heartbeat. Or maybe he'd consider moving here since he loves it so much. Who knows!? Maybe you think I'm crazy, since I said the same thing about Lane, but I meant that too! It's really rare to have such an intellectual, emotional, AND sexual connection with someone. And in my opinion, that's worth sacrificing things for. I realize this is all so far fetched and it's silly to even consider, but sometimes I just can't control my trains of thought. ((Sigh)) And having been single for so long, sometimes those runaway trains are all I've got.

Nothing's Coming Up

So I ended up spending the night at Adam's on Friday. It was pretty last minute. I was out with Lauren, and he was apparently drinking at some work function and he asked me to come over. I almost said no, but then I thought about the fact that Chris just left town, so it could be a while before I get any action lol. So I went over there. We stopped at a bar and had one drink, then we went up to his penthouse and watched an episode of Jeopardy. Lol. Then we went upstairs. Things started out fine, but I was in a really giggly mood for some reason. He put on some movie with Justin Timberlake, uhhhh...Alpha Dog! And he kept talking about how good it was. I've never seen it. But we were fooling around, and the movie was so distracting, and being in the weird mood I was in, every time a guy who wasn't Justin Timberlake popped up on the screen, I said, "Is THAT Justin Timberlake?" and then he'd be like, "No, that's so-and-so." This went on for about 15 minutes lol. Then he started licking and breathing in my ear, which was really giving me the giggles because he was tickling me. Anyway, after a solid chunk of foreplay, I was ready to move things along, and he kept talking about how he couldn't wait to get it in, but then...he couldn't. He had a chubby, but not like a full hard on. So I went down on him for what was like...surely the world record for longest blowjob ever and still no improvements!! UGh... He was moaning and sighing as if he was enjoying it, and I was giving it all I had, but after a while it was just starting to feel like work, because clearly, it wasn't going to happen and could we please just go to sleep already. And I found that my mind kept drifting back to Chris, and how sexy he is, and his perfect lips and how great the sex is and how much fun I have with him. In fact, the whole experience with Adam felt sort of far away. Like I was just not really that into it, more just going through the motions. I mean I was into it, I'm just not really that invested in him anymore I guess. The sex never happened either. He said he had whiskey dick since he'd been drinking since 7pm. I said it was cool and suggested we revisit the idea in the morning, and he agreed. Well, morning came and he didn't. Still couldn't get it up. WTF? Now I'm starting to wonder if he's gay. I mean he's a great dresser, and he wears Jo Malone cologne, and he complimented me on my nail polish. But there was the drinking... I just don't know! I asked my gay cousin about it, and he said it was probably just the booze, but no morning wood? That could be a red flag. Granted, we only got about 3 hours of sleep, so maybe that's not enough time for morning wood? I dunno... I'm just so...kind of...uuuuggggghhhhh ((sigh)) about it all now. Loss of interest I guess. I need to get out more. It's time for me to meet someone new.

This Could Be Heaven or This Could Be Hell

Chris texted me around 7 or 8 last night and asked if I was going out. I was hoping to go out, but had no plans, so I said I wasn't sure. He said he was flying back from NYC, getting in around midnight and planning to go out for a few drinks and we should meet up. So we did! It was me, Chris, and his friend Joey, who was with him on the first night we met. He's pretty cool. By the time we got out, it was like 1:30am, but hey! We had a great time. We all ended up back in Chris's hotel room, and smoked pot out of an apple lol. Lauren asked me today if I'm sure I'm not in my 20's. I'm starting to think I might be, because I wasn't drunk enough to black out, but the last thing I remember is smoking that pot, and apparently Chris and I had sex and I have absolutely ZERO memory of that. But I woke up in my top and bra, naked from the waist down. Lol, hot. We had sex again this morning though, and that was pretty great, in addition to the benefit of me remembering it. God, he is so beautiful. He has these full, perfect lips that make you just wanna bite them. And the most charming smile. And his tattoos are so sexy. Oh, and his hair! It's so soft and shiny and full and running my hands through it, I imagine it's what quicksilver feels like. Every time I see him, I'm taken aback by how attractive he is. And it doesn't hurt that he's fun, and down to earth, and I don't feel like I have to play games with him, because I know it can't go anywhere. ((Sigh)) That's both an upside and a downside to the situation. I know I said I wasn't looking for a friends with benefits kind of situation, buuuuut that's basically what this is. Whatever. I don't wanna overthink it. I like Chris and we're having fun.

Didn't hear from Adam all weekend soooo I guess that's done. Again, whatever. It's not like I didn't have other things (read: hot guy) to do. 

#GOALS

Do you ever just feel so sexy and confident that you're like, "This night is gonna be awesome!" ??
Cuz that's me tonight. I hit 150 today. I've lost 18 pounds and I'm down to the weight I was when I finished college.
Now I'm heading out for a night on the town!!

XOXO!

My English Gentleman

Last night I went to this crazy Mardi Gras costume party. Very exclusive. Kevin invited me a while back and despite the way he's been acting lately, he said he still wanted me to go. So we had plans to meet at this bar and he and his friends had arranged for some sort of shuttle to take us to the venue. My plan was to Uber to the bar so I wouldn't have to drive, but there were no Ubers available because of all the parades and whatnot, so I had to call a regular taxi, which was going to mean I'd miss the shuttle. So Kevin told me to just meet him at the venue, and they'd probably be in the line. So I got there and called him, and their bus hadn't even gotten there yet! So basically, I ended up standing on a street corner alone for 45 minutes waiting in the freezing cold. But he ended up texting a friend of his, Dave, who was already in the line, and he was able to get me in. So Dave was with a small group, and he introduced me to everyone, but the most interesting person was definitely Jamie, the British guy. He was dressed in all pink, including a wig, and was apparently dressed as a rugby player. Turns out, he actually plays rugby (of course). Well we just sort of hit it off immediately, and were talking and found we had lots of common interests - books, BBC Tv, political views, etc. So it ended up just being Jamie and I at the bar alone and his other friends wandered off. Eventually we went into one of the stage rooms to find everybody. I still hadn't heard from Kevin, and it was close to midnight by this time. But then when we found Dave, he said he's just seen him! He didn't even text me to let me know he was there! And then Jamie kept saying, "Oh well we should probably go find him, since you need to say hi and everything." But I was hesitant to do so because of the way Kevin has been acting lately. Ever since I told him I just wanted to be friends, he's been kind of a dick. Trying to make me jealous, and just being generally immature. So I ended up explaining the whole situation to Jamie, who apparently had been under the impression that Kevin and I were some sort of item. I set him straight quickly though, and I told him I'd rather hang out with him than with Kevin. So I did! :)
And we had the best time. I didn't drink too much, which is good. Just enough to catch a buzz. And Jamie and I, both being virgins to this particular party, had a good time people watching. There were people there that were basically naked. Sooo that was interesting. He kept telling me I wasn't like any of the other American girls he'd met, because I'm much more progressive, and I'm very sarcastic, and straight forward, like British people. I laughed and said I'd take that as a compliment. At one point, we were on the dance floor and he was just staring at me, and I said, "What? Why are you staring at me like that?" and he said, "Because I'd really like to kiss you right now."
So I kissed him! It was wonderful. It felt so...organic. I just can't remember the last time I just met someone out of nowhere and liked him like that. I mean he's hot, he's tall, he has a sexy accent, and he's smart and well-read. What's not to like?? Well...there is the part about him living in Manchester. ((Sigh)) Why can't I ever find a good guy that lives HERE?! He's only going to be here till Wednesday. So after we kissed for a while, he asked me if I was free any time this week, because he'd like to see me again. And I told him I didn't really know what my schedule was yet (which is true), but that I'm sure I can squeeze him in. Then we went back to kissing.
Inevitably, I did have to go find Kevin and say hi. It would have been rude not to. So Jamie went off to find Dave, who was holding all his cash since Jamie didn't have any pockets lol, and I went to find Kevin. He was dancing, and super fucked up. Apparently he took ecstasy. ((rolls eyes)) He introduced me to a couple of his friends, but really didn't seem too interested in talking to me. Which was totally ok by me, cuz I just wanted to get back to Jamie, but I didn't want Kevin to see us together, because I figured...I dunno, that would just be too wrong, seeing as Kevin was the one who invited me to the party in the first place. So after Kevin and I chatted for a bit, I told him I was going to grab another drink, and went to find Jamie. Then we continued with our fun night. We stayed until the place shut down, around 4am, and then finally walked outside to find a taxi. I was really uncertain at this point about inviting him back to my place. I mean I wanted to, but 1) my place is a huge mess right now with all these puppies and 2) I told myself I wasn't going to have any more casual hookups, because ultimately, that's not what I'm looking for. But of course, I gave in, and invited him back with me. I mean he had no phone and no money and his friends were gone. I couldn't, in good conscious, leave this foreigner to fend for himself! I warned him about the puppies, and the messy house, but he said he loves puppies, and didn't care. Good thing it was dark. Lol.
So things went basically the way you'd expect. Except, I took off all my makeup. I wasn't worried about what he'd think. And he said I was beautiful. He also said he respected me, and we didn't have to anything I didn't wanna do, but I wanted to. So we did.
It's funny because he's very proper, in a way. He never swears, he apologizes constantly (which is definitely a British thing) and he was bashful to even say the words, "have sex". Lol. He was just kind of like, "Well if you want to..." and he sort of made this gesture that said, "you know what I mean" and I just laughed. While we were at the party, he actually used the words "make love". BAHA! He's so cute. And he literally could not keep his hands off me. Even when we were just laying there, he was constantly rubbing my back, my arms, anywhere my skin was exposed. It was heaven... The sun was up by the time we went to sleep. And it wasn't like real sleep. It was like a nap, followed by more sex, and then more napping. Around 4, we actually got out of bed, and then I drove him back to his friends house on my way to Bethany's for a Super Bowl Party. I only stayed for the first half though, cuz I was exhausted. Jamie doesn't have a working phone here, since he lives in England, but he told me he would Facebook message me. I'm still waiting for that to happen, but hopefully I see him again before he leaves. And if I don't, that's ok. I had a great time, and that's what matters.

FWB+...?, Christian Bale, and Bethany

Over the past week or two (during which I have been sick, as I always am at this time of year) I've been seriously considering asking Matt out. Like...for drinks or coffee or something. I mean the booty call thing is great, but initially, I feel like we had chemistry, and I was into him. And I mean the sex is great, so maybe it could work for us if we gave it a shot, right? But of course, there's that age old debate about whether or not I wanna put something that's working so well at risk. I mean, if he's not interested in dating, do I lose my trusty booty call? And if he was interested in dating, why are we still hooking up? I mean if he wanted to date people, he wouldn't need a booty call, right?? I dunno, I guess I've never really analyzed the psychology behind boys and their booty calls, I only get it from my end. To me, sex is important. It's necessary for my health. And while I prefer to be getting it from someone I care about, who cares about me in return, that's not always an option. And finding an attractive, drama-free booty call who actually knows his way around the female anatomy is not easy! Trust me. Oh, and there's that small problem of him being only 25. ((Sigh)) So, do I ask him out, or not?

My trips to NOLA and Houston are coming up quick! There's only 25 more days till Christmas, AH!! In my efforts to avoid having to spend my entire time in Houston with Bethany, I never told her about my trip. But apparently, Taryn got drunk and spilled the beans last week, so I had to do some quick thinking in the damage control department. Bethany posted on my facebook wall yesterday, asking if I was gonna be home for Christmas. I very diplomatically replied that I would be spending Christmas with my mom this year, but that I was thinking about coming to Houston in January. But that I was still trying to finalize dates and things with work and my dad. The backlash from this response was quite funny. First Izzie texted me.

"So I saw you and Bethany's FB exchange. Your Houston trip, is it really not finalized or are you just trying to avoid her? Cuz I'm planning to go to Houston that week specifically to see you..."

Then Jenna texted me.

"I see you folded under pressure."


BAHAHAHA! I reassured both of them that everything is still on, I'm just trying to avoid any more drama with Bethany. But now comes the hard part. I really don't know how I'm going to deal with her when I get there. She left Chicago in the worst possible way, and she never apologized to me for all that bullshit she put me through. I'm willing to forgive, as is my tendency with good friends, but I can't forget. And it's really hard to forgive someone who doesn't even seem remorseful, let alone aware that what they did was completely shiteous. I mean she apologized to Carrie and Ali, so why not me??? Taryn said that when she told her I was coming, Bethany acted awkward and just said "We haven't really talked much since Chicago" and then changed the subject. G, I wonder why!!?? I really do value Bethany's friendship, and I know she's been through a rough couple of years, what with her mom passing away and everything... But she has changed so much that it's like...I hardly recognize the person I used to call my best friend. What's a girl supposed to do in a situation like that???







Well anyway, I have one more juicy tidbit for you guys. :P Last night at work, I was standing in the waitress well staring at this guy facing me from across the bar, for the better part of an hour. He was totally hot, and totally looked like Christian Bale, and I wasn't gonna let him walk out of the bar without at least attempting to talk to him. So I formulated a plan. Lol. I asked Warren to pour me a shot of tequila, and then give Mr. Bale a shot of Jameson from me. Then ideally, he would look across the bar at me, I would hold up my shot, we would take it together, and then he would come over and talk to me. Lol. That was the plan. So I tell Warren the plan, and omg...IT WORKED! JUST LIKE THAT!!
So he's walking over to me, and I'm like "Omgomghe'scomingoverherehow'smyhair?!" to Warren and he just laughs. So then he comes over, and this is sort of how our conversation started...



"Hey thanks for the shot! What was that for?"
"Oh, I was just telling my friend how I thought you looked like Christian Bale, so I thought what the hell! I'm gonna send him a shot."
Then we briefly discussed which Christian Bale he looks like (Batman? American Psycho? The Machinist??? Lol), because apparently he's been told before he looks like American Psycho Christian Bale. And I assured him that that is a compliment, as Christian was much younger then, and in very good shape. Lol. Then I said, "I hope you like Jameson? I wasn't sure what you were drinking over there."
And he said, "Hey, a free shot is a free shot!" Now that's what I like to hear.
He asked me where I'm from, I told him to guess. He said Canada?? WTF? Lol. I asked why, and he said because Canadians are nice. Lol. I said so are Texans. We chitchatted a bit more, but then one of my tables flagged me down, so he said he was gonna go back to his friends, implying I should go talk to him later. So I took care of my business and then he got my attention again as I was heading towards the stairs.
"Sorry, duty calls." I said.
"No, no, I understand! What's your name?"
"Peyton."
"I'm [Christian Bale]." Lol. We shake hands.
"It's nice to meet you." I tell him. I'm sure I could not stop grinning. :)
"Well, would you like to get coffee or something some time?"
"Sure." :D
"I mean I gotta get your number before you leave again."
I laughed and told him I had to grab something from downstairs, but that I would be right back.
So I went downstairs, grabbed one of my business cards and powdered my nose, and then went back up to find him. And he was gone! I couldn't find him anywhere! So I asked the door guy if he'd seen a guy in a maroon v-neck leave. He said no, so I started walking back towards the back room again. Then we ended up practically running into each other at the top of the stairs. So I gave him my business card, and we chatted a bit more. He asked me what my schedule looks like and I told him it just so happens I have this week off school. Then he grimaced, and said he'll be traveling all week.  Which got us talking a little bit about how he travels for work. I asked him what he does, and he said, "Well we'll talk about it. What's your Sunday look like?"
And at first I thought he said "Sundays", meaning all my Sundays, so I said my Sundays are generally free, and I usually do whatever I want, because I don't have school or work. And then I realized he meant this Sunday specifically. So hopefully that didn't make me sound desperate. And then he said, "Well let's do something on Sunday. Forget about coffee, let's do something exciting." And I laughed and said ok! And that was that! He went back to his friends, and I went back to work, and I think he left shortly afterwards, but he has my number! And I really, really hope he calls!
I have this complex where when I first meet a guy, if he seems really into me, I just think it's too good to be true. I dunno why, it just sorta puts me on my guard. Like I don't wanna get my hopes up, ya know? Because if he doesn't call, I'm gonna be really disappointed! :( But the ball is in his court. This is completely out of my control now. ((Sigh)) This is going to be a long day.

The Hottie Next Door

So a couple of weeks ago like a troop of youngish people moved in next door. They're basically all living in a commune and I have no idea what their exact numbers are, but they all seem pretty cool. Tonight when I got home from work, one guy and one girl were sitting outside drinking a beer. When I took Jasper out to walk him, the guy was petting him and fawning all over him. So I stopped to chat with them for a while. Their names are Tara and Roan (sp?) - pronounced R0-en, two syllables. He said he goes by Ro for short. And he's Irish. And SOOOO FINE.... Lol. For one, he's got that sexy Irish accent, two he has a sexy Irish name, and three, he has a sexy, very masculine aura about him. Lol. And he's tall! I have no idea how old he is though. But they told me that they're here for the summer on a work visa, and he's still looking for a job. Lucky for me, I actually know someone who is looking for a guy bartender, so I asked him if he had any experience and if he would be interested. And he said yes, and he would be very interested and that would be great! So I'm trying to hook him up with a job. He also said that if I ever wanted someone to walk Jasper, he loves dogs, and will play with him/walk him anytime. So I definitely might take him up on that, if only for an excuse to talk to him.
Damn he's hot... Lol.

In other news, Bethany tried calling me again yesterday, and I didn't answer. I'm still not over everything that happened and I just don't feel like I really have anything to say to her. In fact, I've already taken most of the pictures I had of us around my apartment down, and replaced them with pics of me and Abbie. Not because I feel like I'm replacing Bethany with Abbie, but mostly because I couldn't stand looking at Bethany's face, and I didn't really have any pictures of me and Abbie up.

A couple weekends ago I hooked up with Matt again. I hadn't seen him since...well since the first time we hooked up in early January, and he just kinda texted me out of the blue. And I was overdue for some birthday sex, so I figured what the hell. And god it was awesome... Just SEX. No drama, no strings attached! And he's lost weight since I last saw him. Not that he was fat or anything before, but now he's like really cut. HOTT. Also, he said we're definitely gonna have to do that again. Haha. I'm down.

Anyway, my dad is coming to visit this weekend for Father's Day. Hopefully there won't be any girlfriend shenanigans. Ugh... I am looking forward to seeing him though. I haven't seen my mom since Christmas and I miss her too! It's weird going for so long without seeing my parents. It's also weird living in a new place that they've never been in or seen. Like...being here and not having memories of them being here, ya know?? Well that's all for now. Hopefully I will have some more exciting news about Ro soon... ;)

The Perfect...

Finally saw Brazil last night! He came over and we ordered in and watched Harry Potter. His flight had been delayed due to plane issues, so he just got in yesterday morning and both of us were too tired to go anywhere, which is why we decided on the movie. And he was the one who picked Harry Potter! Lol, it was the The Order of the Phoenix, since he's seen the first four, but he kept asking me questions the whole time! Lol. We were downstairs watching the movie in my room, cuz I didn't wanna disturb the roommates. Anyway, about halfway through the movie, he started getting sleepy.
"Help me stay awake!" He said.
"Do you want me to slap you?" I teased.
"No! There are other ways you can keep me from falling asleep."
"And what might those be?"
"Well, there's this..."
And he leaned in and kissed me. It's funny cuz he kissed me right at the part where Harry and Cho kissed for the first time. Lol. So we even had kissing music. Lawlz... But damn, he is a really, really good kisser. He kept running his fingers through my hair, and caressing my face. Eventually we made it through the whole movie, granted I had to keep pausing and rewinding due to his kissing and questioning, but we finished it!
And then it was back to kissing. And then that started to lead to other things...
I didn't stop him when he got to second base, but then as he was rounding third I hesitated.
"Let me do something for you..." He whispered to me in that sexy accent of his.
I sighed and caved.
Oh. My. God...
I thought guys that enjoyed going down on girls were just a myth. But they're real! And it was like...mind-blowing good. I mean...wow. I'm getting chills just thinking about it now. I was practically in a state of paralysis afterwards. Then he told me he really likes doing it, and that he would do it again if I'd let him! Lol. He also said women are complicated and special, and that it's flattering if you can give a woman an orgasm. G's, I would be more than happy to oblige him any time after that performance!
So I just laid there a while and he was running his fingers across my skin everywhere, giving me goosebumps. The way he touched me it was like...it was like...so tender, like he was genuinely fascinated or something. Maybe I've just forgotten what it feels like to be spoiled. But here I am talking all about the sexy stuff, and not about the conversation, which was also amazing. I learned a lot about him, and he definitely calmed my fears about a lot of things regarding him. The band thing, the age thing, and otherwise. Apparently he usually dates older women because he said he doesn't have the patience for the younger girls, or something like that. Lol. And he kept telling me I was beautiful, and that I'm a great person and he loves talking to me. Ok now I'm just gushing. But really it was like the perfect night. Perfect. He stayed and we cuddled and he gave me backrubs. :)
I can't wait to see him again.

Interesting Developments

OMG. I'm kind of drunk right now. And I didn't mean to get drunk. But I was eating leftover wings, and all I had to drink was bottled water, or wine. So I opened this bottle of sparkling wine that Brandon and I bought about a week ago, and I poured myself a glass. I figured, what the hell? And the wings were a bit spicey, so I ended up chugging my first glass, and then my second, and well...here I am! Drunk! Hahaha.

So I'm pretty buzzed, chatting on Facebook, and guess who messages me?

You guys probably don't remember him, but back when we met, I referred to him as The Good Guy. We actually "met" on a dating website, and he knew Bethany. Well, every now and then, he comes into my bar, or we run into each other. I've just never mentioned it before, cuz I never thought it was really relevant. Ya know? But tonight, he sent me a FB chat message, and when I went ot write back, he had signed off. So I texted him.

Me: You hung up on me!

TGG: My computer is being a biatch. Whats up?

Me: I dunno, you messaged me!

TGG: Yea, I was looking forward to some FB chat but alas, my computer is ridiculous. Just sayin hey.

Me: Ah...yes. FB chat is my only form of entertainment at my new place till the cable gets set up.

TGG: Where's your new place?

Me: (description)

TGG: Cool. I'm still at the same place. This is gonna sound weird, but I had a dream about you last night.

Me: Aaahahaha! About what?

(Ten minutes goes by...)

Me: Comeon...The suspense is killing me!

TGG: The fact that I'm not going to tell you what the dream was about will probably give you a good idea of what was involved. So yea... It was interesting.

Me: OMG. WE HAD DREAM SEX!?

TGG: Lol yes. We did. I woke up as surprised as you are.

Me: Surprised and satisfied! Haha. You know what that means, right?

TGG: It means I woke up with a boner and had to pee really bad.

Me: Lmao, Well yes, but it also means you have deep rooted sexual frustration that you secretly want to take out on me.

(Several minutes go by...)

Me: [TGG]. There's no need to be embarassed. We're both consenting adults. Lol.

TGG: Ah! I just got every text back to back all at once. now my phone is being a bitch.

Me: Man...technology must really be out to get you.

TGG: Yep. Well FYI, you were a good lay in the dream. Just sayin...

Me: Lol. Well FYI, I'm not just good in dreams. Just sayin...

TGG: So what are you saying, Peyton? I'm listening.

Me: Well...I thought I was being pretty clear. Heh.

TGG: I'll keep that in mind. I'm just chilling at my place by the way.

Me: Oh really? Same here.

TGG: Feeling froggy? Why don't you jump on over here?

Me: While that is rather tempting, I am covered in paint and in desperate need of a shower. Lol. I had to repaint/clean my old apt today. So I'm going to request a raincheck. And I don't mean "i'mblowingyouoffandcallingitaraincheck", I mean an actual raincheck.

TGG: Ok cool stuff. I'll take a raincheck. On that note, though, I must depart and call it a night. We'll chat soon though.

Me: Very well then. Hopefully I'll make another appearance in your dreams. ;)



That concluded our conversation. And reading it back, I almost feel ashamed at my tipsy, randy self, but oh well! It was fun!

And who knows what may happen. A rebound may commence...



Although, unfortunately, I do have to give you all a Brandon update.

Saturday night, I was in a really good mood at work again, because Todd played really good in his game, and I got to watch most of it.

Anyways, Brandon got to work 2 hours after me, and I ignored him, as usual. But around last call, the lights came on, and I was closing out a tab, and he walks up right night to me at the computer.

"So you're not gonna talk to me tonight either?" He asked.

"Nope." I said, as I swiped the credit card.

"Why not?"

"Because I have nothing to say to you." The stupid credit card wouldn't go through!

"Well I just want to talk to you about-"

"I don't care. I'm not going to waste any more time, effort, or words on you, Brandon. Just leave me alone." I grabbed the check presenter and made for the other computer, since that one wasn't working anyway.

He followed me!

I don't know what he was saying, because I wasn't listening, but he was hissing in my ear, stuff about our relationship, that he wanted to talk about.

I physically pushed him away from me.

"Leave me alone! If you wanna go fuck other girls, that's your business, but I don't want to hear about it." I walked off again. By this time, I was starting to get upset. He was still following me.

When I got to the other end of the bar, I asked Mark to please tell Brandon that I now was not the time or place to talk to me.

Mark looked up from what he was doing, glanced over at Brandon, and nodded.

But Brandon still persisted!

"It's not about other girls!" He said.

My eyes were flooding with tears, and my face was hot with anger.

I just can't deal with this. Especially not now, I thought.

Magically, Mr. S. appeared at the end of the bar. I hurried over to him.

"Could you please tell Brandon to leave me alone. I can't deal with this right now." I pleaded to him, tears starting to spill over.

He looked sympathetic.

"Come over here. You can go to the back bar. We'll send Sierra up front." He said.

I had to walk back past Brandon to leave the bar. I was so upset at him for doing this to me, now at work, and for almost making me cry, in front of everyone! I shoved him as hard as I could up against the beer cooler.

"You're a piece of shit!" I yelled over the loud music as I stormed off.

The rest of the night went by without incident.

I still don't understand why he's doing this to me.

I just want to move on!



Maybe The Good Guy will be a nice distraction, or even a rebound.

I'm getting a bikini wax Wednesday. ((Sigh))

Perhaps I'll give him a call...

Best Dinner Ever!! (Thursday Night: Part I)

OMG OMG OMG!!! So Todd is in town for the weekend. And he called me a couple days ago to tell me he was gonna be here, and see if I wanted to go have dinner and catch up. And of course I agreed. So we made plans for Thursday and he said he'd call me after his practice.
So today, he called me, and I was getting ready for work. I figured we'd go someplace lowkey, and I'd just head straight to work from there.
Well, then he informs me that it's his night to take the vets out. They have this tradition where the rookie has to buy the team dinner. So he asked if I wanted to come. And of course I said, "DUH!!"
So I changed my clothes, sexy jeans, heels and a somewhat casual top to dress it down. Fixed my hair and makeup, got all my work stuff together, and went to meet him at his hotel. We arrived at the restaurant at the same time as the rest of his team. And I was the only girl!!! It was just me and like 15 professional football players!!!
IT WAS SOOOOOOOO AWESOME!!!!!
And I had so much fun! I got to meet his whole team, and shoot the shit with them and stuff. Todd gave me the lowdown on all the players, you know, what position they play, how long they've been in the NFL, etc... And of course, Todd and I got to catch up, which was nice. And damn are they a good looking bunch of guys! It's too bad most of them are married.
But it was a much needed picker-upper. After the shitty week I had, man...I was in the best mood ever! I did have to leave straight from there to work, but when I got to work, I was so elated! Nothing could get me down. Todd even said they might stop by my work for a drink afterwards! So when I got to the door, I noticed Brandon, one of the waitresses and Gavin at the door.
"Gavin! If a large group of extremely tall guys comes to the door, don't hassle them about what they're wearing! They're pro football players! And I just got back from dinner with them!"
"Whoa how'd you manage that?" Liza asked.
"One of my best friends is starting for the team this season, and I was the only chick, at a huge table full of hot football guys!"
"High five!" She said.
Brandon didn't look so enthused.
;)

Phase I: Infatuation

Rusty.
I've spent this entire past week with him. It's like I can't get enough of him! And it all started with his show. I went to watch him play, and it was like he became this...this amazing, talented, superhot, smart guy, who I can't help but desire. But then off stage, he's goofy and dorky and kind of shy. And I love it!
He's stayed over here a couple times, and I've stayed with him a couple times. Our dogs love each other too, so that makes things easier.
He wrote this entire song yesterday! Music, lyrics and all, and recorded it and played it for me today and it was...beautiful! Amazing! Ridiculously impressive. And it's not like I'm hero worshipping him or anything, it's just that I have so much respect for him, as a fellow musician. I guess... and I like him!!
I mean he's sooooo nice! He's really sweet to me all the time, and he's always telling me he likes me. I mean, it's just everything! It's the way he looks at me. The way he kisses me on the cheek when we're out. The way he kisses me on the shoulder when we're laying on the couch, watching a movie. The way he likes to hold my hand. The way I always wanna be near him. The way when we're apart, all I think about is the next time I'm gonna see him. The way he sings. The way he makes me completely forget about everything when we're together. The way he always wears those silly black dress shoes with everything. Lol. ((Sigh))
And apparently he tells all his friends about me, because every time I meet one of them, they mention how much they've heard about me. And I almost feel bad, cuz I haven't really told anyone we've been hanging out. I mean, after all the forewarning, and all the stuff people have told me about him, I just feel stupid telling people that we're dating. I dunno why, it's dumb.
But anyways...
I'm just trying to figure out if what I'm feeling is something real. I mean it's all so sudden! And none of it makes sense really.
So, how do you ever know? Is it love? Or just infatuation?