Ughh I know I've been so bad at this. It's hard to find motivation to write, when everything seems so stagnant, and/or depressing.
I've been struggling financially and also with trying to figure out what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. I love doing photography, but I'm not making enough money. My mom keeps trying to get me to take up bartending again, but I just can't. It would feel like a big step backwards, even if it would help me out financially. And the fact that I'm paying exorbitant amounts of money on my student loans every month, loans towards an education in photography, which I'm proud to say I'm actually pursuing, it would just seem like a total waste to pay back that money with earnings from a BARTENDING job. Ugh... I know everyone struggles with identity crises and financial issues, and everyone does things they don't like or don't want to do to survive. But how do you know what's worth it??
I've applied for personal assistant jobs, art gallery jobs, other kinds of photography jobs... Nothing has come through yet, and I'm barely treading water. ((Sigh))
Anyway, the thing that led me here today, the reason I was actually inspired to write is because I do have some good news. I met someone. And he's different. I know, I know, they're all "different"...
But he is difference because he makes me laugh. He makes me laugh with the weird, silly things he does and says. He doesn't seem to care if I might think he's deranged, or a total freak, but I don't think those things, because the weird stuff he does and says makes me laugh! And I think to myself, Seems like something I would do. And he's confident, but not cocky. He makes a plans for our next date while we're on our current one. He kissed me on our second date, but it was a quick, almost chaste kiss. And it just continued to build from there. And I find myself thinking about him more and more, wanting to be with him more and more... But I'm trying very hard to resist my usual tendency to jump in with both feet. I don't wanna get ahead of myself. I spent the night at his place for the first time last night. And I didn't sleep with him. He definitely tried, but I kept redirecting his efforts until he finally asked why I was being so "squirrelly". Lol. I said because I didn't want to have to tell him that I wasn't going to sleep with him tonight. He asked why, not in a petulant way, but just in a curious way. And I said because I want to err on the side of caution, and he said he respects that. Things still got a bit hot and heavy after that, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it and wasn't seriously tempted to sleep with him anyway. ((Sigh)) He was just as rough as I like it, and the way he kissed me it was like he was devouring me, it was just so...sexy. Ah!!
This morning we woke up super early because his room is so bright. He got up and started making coffee, but I didn't stay. I felt terrible leaving Jasper home alone, and I knew I was going to need a nap. I never sleep well the first night in a new guy's bed. Especially when there wasn't even sex! So I basically spent this entire day in bed, intermittently eating donuts, and constantly thinking about Brett, wanting to text him, but not doing it. We did see each other several times this week, so a little distance is probably healthy for a day or 2. He has been pestering me about coming over to my place but... My mom and I decided to tear up the carpet in the living room last week (there are hardwood floors underneath) so it's a total disaster area! Plus, my sister is out of town, and I'm watching her cats, and Brett doesn't know I have 2 cats. He knows about one of them, and Jasper, but...lol. I'd rather just sorta ease him into the zoo that is my life. But really it's just too messy over here right now. And his place is SOOO neat it barely looks lived in. He's an architect and he built and decorated the whole place himself. I'm afraid he'll come over, see the state of chaos I live in and go running for the hills. ((Sigh)) All the more reason for me to want to get my shit together.
Ohhhh what to do, what to do...
Showing posts with label Work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Work. Show all posts
Saturday, June 17, 2017
Tuesday, February 23, 2016
Keeping Busy
Not a whole lot has been going on recently. Well, actually, I've been quite busy. Carrie was here the weekend before last, and she and Lauren and I went out like every night, then Taylor (Sophie's ex-husband, Brent's brother) and his newish girlfriend Cassie came into town this past weekend, so I hung out with them on Friday. Saturday, Lauren and I went to a fancy society party that I scored an invite to through work. We were like the youngest people there and didn't know anyone, but we got to dress up, eat free food and drink free booze though, so that was cool. And afterwards, we changed clothes in her truck like college kids and hit a couple bars. Lol. It was a good time.
Next month I have 3 people I wanna see all coming in town at the same time. So that's gonna be pretty crazy... Sophie is coming for a PhD interview, a friend I met in Chicago, who now lives in NYC, named Grant, who I don't think I've ever mentioned, but he's super cool, and my old friend Shane, who I met through Izzie that lives in Austin. I haven't seen her in forever. Both Grant and Shane are gonna be here for work though, so I'm sure I'll get to see everybody. I'm really excited abou Sophie coming. It seems like I've been seeing so much of her recently! And before I know it, she'll be living back in the states. She applies for programs at Michigan University, NYU and Tulane. NYU is her first choice, but obviously I want her to go to Tulane. It would work out perfectly, because my current roommates lease is up at the end of August, and then she's moving in with her boyfriend, so Sophie can move in with me! Living with Jenn has been great, but what's better than living with your sister?? So I am keeping my fingers crossed.
Did I mention I am fostering a miniature poodle and her six puppies? Jesus, they keep me busy. They're super cute though. Carrie adopted one of them when she was here the other week, but they won't be ready to take home for a couple more weeks.
So Lane and I are talking again. I finally texted him, and things are back to...well not normal, because what even is that with us? But things are on a purely platonic level now. We don't FaceTime anymore of course, and we only text like one or 2 messages at a time, no more conversations that last for days. Just if something comes up that makes me think of him, and vice versa. But I'm ok with that. I'm pretty much over it. It's still a little bit disappointing how everything turned out but you know what they say, out of sight out of mind.
In other news, since I moved here I've had a weekly assignment where I drive all over the city taking photos of houses for the real estate section of the paper. It's really tedious and takes forever and I have to drive really far, but it basically served as like a base pay that I could count on since, being a freelancer, sometimes pay periods can get thin.
Well that was taken away from me and given to some part time guy, who was apparently promised a certain number of hours and wasn't getting them. My boss fought hard for me about it, but apparently there was nothing he could do, because that person isn't someone he manages. ((Sigh)) He was really upset about it when he called to tell me, and he said it's nothing I did wrong, and that in fact, I've done the best job of anyone on them, and that I've been improving the last year in all my work, and he feels shitty about it because instead of being rewarded for my hard work, they're taking money away from me. Ugh. At first, I wasn't really that upset. I mean yea it sucks that I won't be getting that money anymore, but I hate doing the houses. It was boring and I was putting tons of miles on my car doing it. But now I basically have to get a second job to make up that income, and I don't really know what I'm gonna do. I love the flexibility of my job! I love that I can have like an entire day to lay around and then go to work from 7-10 pm and be done for the day sometimes! And I definitely do not want to work somewhere 9-5 or anything like that, because it would limit the number of photo assignments I could take. I spent a good hour last night trolling Craigslist, but mostly it's all restaurant type jobs and I just CANNOT go back to bartending. The week of Mardi Gras, as a favor to one of Bethany's friends, I bartended a private party. It was 2 hours of set up/clean up and like 4 hours of party, and I was EXHAUSTED by the end. My feet and back were killing me. I have no idea how I used to work 10 hour bar shifts when I was living in Chicago. I just can't do that anymore. Plus, I was easily irritated by people the whole time, and I just...can't do it anymore. Sure a private party now and then, fine. But every week? NO WAY.
I did book a wedding for this June, and mermaid season is coming up, so hopefully that will be a nice supplemental income, but it's not dependable enough. What to do, what to do...
Maybe that guy will hate doing the house pictures and not want them anymore.
On a lighter note, I lost 12 pounds, and I'm feeling sexier than ever!
G's this post has been all over the place. Well I'm gonna go get caught up on House of Cards before the new season in a couple weeks. There's a really bad storm coming in and most of the schools and govt buildings here are closed, so I doubt I'll be going anywhere. TaTa!
Next month I have 3 people I wanna see all coming in town at the same time. So that's gonna be pretty crazy... Sophie is coming for a PhD interview, a friend I met in Chicago, who now lives in NYC, named Grant, who I don't think I've ever mentioned, but he's super cool, and my old friend Shane, who I met through Izzie that lives in Austin. I haven't seen her in forever. Both Grant and Shane are gonna be here for work though, so I'm sure I'll get to see everybody. I'm really excited abou Sophie coming. It seems like I've been seeing so much of her recently! And before I know it, she'll be living back in the states. She applies for programs at Michigan University, NYU and Tulane. NYU is her first choice, but obviously I want her to go to Tulane. It would work out perfectly, because my current roommates lease is up at the end of August, and then she's moving in with her boyfriend, so Sophie can move in with me! Living with Jenn has been great, but what's better than living with your sister?? So I am keeping my fingers crossed.
Did I mention I am fostering a miniature poodle and her six puppies? Jesus, they keep me busy. They're super cute though. Carrie adopted one of them when she was here the other week, but they won't be ready to take home for a couple more weeks.
So Lane and I are talking again. I finally texted him, and things are back to...well not normal, because what even is that with us? But things are on a purely platonic level now. We don't FaceTime anymore of course, and we only text like one or 2 messages at a time, no more conversations that last for days. Just if something comes up that makes me think of him, and vice versa. But I'm ok with that. I'm pretty much over it. It's still a little bit disappointing how everything turned out but you know what they say, out of sight out of mind.
In other news, since I moved here I've had a weekly assignment where I drive all over the city taking photos of houses for the real estate section of the paper. It's really tedious and takes forever and I have to drive really far, but it basically served as like a base pay that I could count on since, being a freelancer, sometimes pay periods can get thin.
Well that was taken away from me and given to some part time guy, who was apparently promised a certain number of hours and wasn't getting them. My boss fought hard for me about it, but apparently there was nothing he could do, because that person isn't someone he manages. ((Sigh)) He was really upset about it when he called to tell me, and he said it's nothing I did wrong, and that in fact, I've done the best job of anyone on them, and that I've been improving the last year in all my work, and he feels shitty about it because instead of being rewarded for my hard work, they're taking money away from me. Ugh. At first, I wasn't really that upset. I mean yea it sucks that I won't be getting that money anymore, but I hate doing the houses. It was boring and I was putting tons of miles on my car doing it. But now I basically have to get a second job to make up that income, and I don't really know what I'm gonna do. I love the flexibility of my job! I love that I can have like an entire day to lay around and then go to work from 7-10 pm and be done for the day sometimes! And I definitely do not want to work somewhere 9-5 or anything like that, because it would limit the number of photo assignments I could take. I spent a good hour last night trolling Craigslist, but mostly it's all restaurant type jobs and I just CANNOT go back to bartending. The week of Mardi Gras, as a favor to one of Bethany's friends, I bartended a private party. It was 2 hours of set up/clean up and like 4 hours of party, and I was EXHAUSTED by the end. My feet and back were killing me. I have no idea how I used to work 10 hour bar shifts when I was living in Chicago. I just can't do that anymore. Plus, I was easily irritated by people the whole time, and I just...can't do it anymore. Sure a private party now and then, fine. But every week? NO WAY.
I did book a wedding for this June, and mermaid season is coming up, so hopefully that will be a nice supplemental income, but it's not dependable enough. What to do, what to do...
Maybe that guy will hate doing the house pictures and not want them anymore.
On a lighter note, I lost 12 pounds, and I'm feeling sexier than ever!
G's this post has been all over the place. Well I'm gonna go get caught up on House of Cards before the new season in a couple weeks. There's a really bad storm coming in and most of the schools and govt buildings here are closed, so I doubt I'll be going anywhere. TaTa!
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
All Work and No Play...
Well it turns out Taryn lost the baby. She was having problems, and when she went in for an ultrasound, there was no heartbeat. The baby had stopped developing. So she had to have surgery. Even though I am relieved for her in the sense that she wasn't prepared for a baby, I'm also really sad, and worried about her. The same thing happened to Jenna this past summer, and she was devastated. Granted, she and Justin have been trying to have another baby for a while, and that wasn't her first miscarriage. I just know it can sometimes take a while for it to sink in. But Taryn seems to be doing fine. She and Dahmer are apparently still together (ugh) and she says he's been great, but now that they don't have a baby coming, we'll see how long that lasts...
I've been keeping busy with work, but I'm awfully lonely here most of the time. Other than my family, and Bethany, I don't know anybody here, and my job isn't exactly conducive to making friends, which is unfortunate. Somehow I gotta get myself out there and meeting people. Any ideas? Oh yea, I've also adopted a cat, so my transition into full-blown cat lady is finally beginning. Although I must say, I'm not a cat person. I mean I adopted for the right reasons, and Jasper seems to enjoy having some company when I'm gone. His fascination with Hobbes (cat) is infinite. But Hobbes and I haven't really...bonded. And sometimes he's mean to Jasper for no reason, which pisses me off. Like, Jasper will be laying on the bed, minding his own business, then Hobbes will jump up and bite him! For no reason! And then Jasper jumps down cuz he's scared, the big baby. Any of you cat people have experience with this? How long does it take to feel bonded with a cat?? I mean, I love all animals, don't get me wrong, I just feel like I've learned something about myself. And that is that I am not a cat person. But he's mine now and it's not like I'm going to take him back to the shelter just because we haven't totally hit it off. Maybe it will get better with time? ((Sigh))
Well I'm heading to Houston for Thanksgiving this year. I get to meet Dad's new girlfriend. Yay. (Can you sense the sarcasm?) Other than that, I don't really have much news. God, when did my life become so...boring?!
I've been keeping busy with work, but I'm awfully lonely here most of the time. Other than my family, and Bethany, I don't know anybody here, and my job isn't exactly conducive to making friends, which is unfortunate. Somehow I gotta get myself out there and meeting people. Any ideas? Oh yea, I've also adopted a cat, so my transition into full-blown cat lady is finally beginning. Although I must say, I'm not a cat person. I mean I adopted for the right reasons, and Jasper seems to enjoy having some company when I'm gone. His fascination with Hobbes (cat) is infinite. But Hobbes and I haven't really...bonded. And sometimes he's mean to Jasper for no reason, which pisses me off. Like, Jasper will be laying on the bed, minding his own business, then Hobbes will jump up and bite him! For no reason! And then Jasper jumps down cuz he's scared, the big baby. Any of you cat people have experience with this? How long does it take to feel bonded with a cat?? I mean, I love all animals, don't get me wrong, I just feel like I've learned something about myself. And that is that I am not a cat person. But he's mine now and it's not like I'm going to take him back to the shelter just because we haven't totally hit it off. Maybe it will get better with time? ((Sigh))
Well I'm heading to Houston for Thanksgiving this year. I get to meet Dad's new girlfriend. Yay. (Can you sense the sarcasm?) Other than that, I don't really have much news. God, when did my life become so...boring?!
Saturday, December 1, 2012
FWB+...?, Christian Bale, and Bethany
Over the past week or two (during which I have been sick, as I always am at this time of year) I've been seriously considering asking Matt out. Like...for drinks or coffee or something. I mean the booty call thing is great, but initially, I feel like we had chemistry, and I was into him. And I mean the sex is great, so maybe it could work for us if we gave it a shot, right? But of course, there's that age old debate about whether or not I wanna put something that's working so well at risk. I mean, if he's not interested in dating, do I lose my trusty booty call? And if he was interested in dating, why are we still hooking up? I mean if he wanted to date people, he wouldn't need a booty call, right?? I dunno, I guess I've never really analyzed the psychology behind boys and their booty calls, I only get it from my end. To me, sex is important. It's necessary for my health. And while I prefer to be getting it from someone I care about, who cares about me in return, that's not always an option. And finding an attractive, drama-free booty call who actually knows his way around the female anatomy is not easy! Trust me. Oh, and there's that small problem of him being only 25. ((Sigh)) So, do I ask him out, or not?
My trips to NOLA and Houston are coming up quick! There's only 25 more days till Christmas, AH!! In my efforts to avoid having to spend my entire time in Houston with Bethany, I never told her about my trip. But apparently, Taryn got drunk and spilled the beans last week, so I had to do some quick thinking in the damage control department. Bethany posted on my facebook wall yesterday, asking if I was gonna be home for Christmas. I very diplomatically replied that I would be spending Christmas with my mom this year, but that I was thinking about coming to Houston in January. But that I was still trying to finalize dates and things with work and my dad. The backlash from this response was quite funny. First Izzie texted me.
"So I saw you and Bethany's FB exchange. Your Houston trip, is it really not finalized or are you just trying to avoid her? Cuz I'm planning to go to Houston that week specifically to see you..."
Then Jenna texted me.
"I see you folded under pressure."
BAHAHAHA! I reassured both of them that everything is still on, I'm just trying to avoid any more drama with Bethany. But now comes the hard part. I really don't know how I'm going to deal with her when I get there. She left Chicago in the worst possible way, and she never apologized to me for all that bullshit she put me through. I'm willing to forgive, as is my tendency with good friends, but I can't forget. And it's really hard to forgive someone who doesn't even seem remorseful, let alone aware that what they did was completely shiteous. I mean she apologized to Carrie and Ali, so why not me??? Taryn said that when she told her I was coming, Bethany acted awkward and just said "We haven't really talked much since Chicago" and then changed the subject. G, I wonder why!!?? I really do value Bethany's friendship, and I know she's been through a rough couple of years, what with her mom passing away and everything... But she has changed so much that it's like...I hardly recognize the person I used to call my best friend. What's a girl supposed to do in a situation like that???
Well anyway, I have one more juicy tidbit for you guys. :P Last night at work, I was standing in the waitress well staring at this guy facing me from across the bar, for the better part of an hour. He was totally hot, and totally looked like Christian Bale, and I wasn't gonna let him walk out of the bar without at least attempting to talk to him. So I formulated a plan. Lol. I asked Warren to pour me a shot of tequila, and then give Mr. Bale a shot of Jameson from me. Then ideally, he would look across the bar at me, I would hold up my shot, we would take it together, and then he would come over and talk to me. Lol. That was the plan. So I tell Warren the plan, and omg...IT WORKED! JUST LIKE THAT!!
So he's walking over to me, and I'm like "Omgomghe'scomingoverherehow'smyhair?!" to Warren and he just laughs. So then he comes over, and this is sort of how our conversation started...
"Hey thanks for the shot! What was that for?"
"Oh, I was just telling my friend how I thought you looked like Christian Bale, so I thought what the hell! I'm gonna send him a shot."
Then we briefly discussed which Christian Bale he looks like (Batman? American Psycho? The Machinist??? Lol), because apparently he's been told before he looks like American Psycho Christian Bale. And I assured him that that is a compliment, as Christian was much younger then, and in very good shape. Lol. Then I said, "I hope you like Jameson? I wasn't sure what you were drinking over there."
And he said, "Hey, a free shot is a free shot!" Now that's what I like to hear.
He asked me where I'm from, I told him to guess. He said Canada?? WTF? Lol. I asked why, and he said because Canadians are nice. Lol. I said so are Texans. We chitchatted a bit more, but then one of my tables flagged me down, so he said he was gonna go back to his friends, implying I should go talk to him later. So I took care of my business and then he got my attention again as I was heading towards the stairs.
"Sorry, duty calls." I said.
"No, no, I understand! What's your name?"
"Peyton."
"I'm [Christian Bale]." Lol. We shake hands.
"It's nice to meet you." I tell him. I'm sure I could not stop grinning. :)
"Well, would you like to get coffee or something some time?"
"Sure." :D
"I mean I gotta get your number before you leave again."
I laughed and told him I had to grab something from downstairs, but that I would be right back.
So I went downstairs, grabbed one of my business cards and powdered my nose, and then went back up to find him. And he was gone! I couldn't find him anywhere! So I asked the door guy if he'd seen a guy in a maroon v-neck leave. He said no, so I started walking back towards the back room again. Then we ended up practically running into each other at the top of the stairs. So I gave him my business card, and we chatted a bit more. He asked me what my schedule looks like and I told him it just so happens I have this week off school. Then he grimaced, and said he'll be traveling all week. Which got us talking a little bit about how he travels for work. I asked him what he does, and he said, "Well we'll talk about it. What's your Sunday look like?"
And at first I thought he said "Sundays", meaning all my Sundays, so I said my Sundays are generally free, and I usually do whatever I want, because I don't have school or work. And then I realized he meant this Sunday specifically. So hopefully that didn't make me sound desperate. And then he said, "Well let's do something on Sunday. Forget about coffee, let's do something exciting." And I laughed and said ok! And that was that! He went back to his friends, and I went back to work, and I think he left shortly afterwards, but he has my number! And I really, really hope he calls!
I have this complex where when I first meet a guy, if he seems really into me, I just think it's too good to be true. I dunno why, it just sorta puts me on my guard. Like I don't wanna get my hopes up, ya know? Because if he doesn't call, I'm gonna be really disappointed! :( But the ball is in his court. This is completely out of my control now. ((Sigh)) This is going to be a long day.
My trips to NOLA and Houston are coming up quick! There's only 25 more days till Christmas, AH!! In my efforts to avoid having to spend my entire time in Houston with Bethany, I never told her about my trip. But apparently, Taryn got drunk and spilled the beans last week, so I had to do some quick thinking in the damage control department. Bethany posted on my facebook wall yesterday, asking if I was gonna be home for Christmas. I very diplomatically replied that I would be spending Christmas with my mom this year, but that I was thinking about coming to Houston in January. But that I was still trying to finalize dates and things with work and my dad. The backlash from this response was quite funny. First Izzie texted me.
"So I saw you and Bethany's FB exchange. Your Houston trip, is it really not finalized or are you just trying to avoid her? Cuz I'm planning to go to Houston that week specifically to see you..."
Then Jenna texted me.
"I see you folded under pressure."
BAHAHAHA! I reassured both of them that everything is still on, I'm just trying to avoid any more drama with Bethany. But now comes the hard part. I really don't know how I'm going to deal with her when I get there. She left Chicago in the worst possible way, and she never apologized to me for all that bullshit she put me through. I'm willing to forgive, as is my tendency with good friends, but I can't forget. And it's really hard to forgive someone who doesn't even seem remorseful, let alone aware that what they did was completely shiteous. I mean she apologized to Carrie and Ali, so why not me??? Taryn said that when she told her I was coming, Bethany acted awkward and just said "We haven't really talked much since Chicago" and then changed the subject. G, I wonder why!!?? I really do value Bethany's friendship, and I know she's been through a rough couple of years, what with her mom passing away and everything... But she has changed so much that it's like...I hardly recognize the person I used to call my best friend. What's a girl supposed to do in a situation like that???
Well anyway, I have one more juicy tidbit for you guys. :P Last night at work, I was standing in the waitress well staring at this guy facing me from across the bar, for the better part of an hour. He was totally hot, and totally looked like Christian Bale, and I wasn't gonna let him walk out of the bar without at least attempting to talk to him. So I formulated a plan. Lol. I asked Warren to pour me a shot of tequila, and then give Mr. Bale a shot of Jameson from me. Then ideally, he would look across the bar at me, I would hold up my shot, we would take it together, and then he would come over and talk to me. Lol. That was the plan. So I tell Warren the plan, and omg...IT WORKED! JUST LIKE THAT!!
So he's walking over to me, and I'm like "Omgomghe'scomingoverherehow'smyhair?!" to Warren and he just laughs. So then he comes over, and this is sort of how our conversation started...
"Hey thanks for the shot! What was that for?"
"Oh, I was just telling my friend how I thought you looked like Christian Bale, so I thought what the hell! I'm gonna send him a shot."
Then we briefly discussed which Christian Bale he looks like (Batman? American Psycho? The Machinist??? Lol), because apparently he's been told before he looks like American Psycho Christian Bale. And I assured him that that is a compliment, as Christian was much younger then, and in very good shape. Lol. Then I said, "I hope you like Jameson? I wasn't sure what you were drinking over there."
And he said, "Hey, a free shot is a free shot!" Now that's what I like to hear.
He asked me where I'm from, I told him to guess. He said Canada?? WTF? Lol. I asked why, and he said because Canadians are nice. Lol. I said so are Texans. We chitchatted a bit more, but then one of my tables flagged me down, so he said he was gonna go back to his friends, implying I should go talk to him later. So I took care of my business and then he got my attention again as I was heading towards the stairs.
"Sorry, duty calls." I said.
"No, no, I understand! What's your name?"
"Peyton."
"I'm [Christian Bale]." Lol. We shake hands.
"It's nice to meet you." I tell him. I'm sure I could not stop grinning. :)
"Well, would you like to get coffee or something some time?"
"Sure." :D
"I mean I gotta get your number before you leave again."
I laughed and told him I had to grab something from downstairs, but that I would be right back.
So I went downstairs, grabbed one of my business cards and powdered my nose, and then went back up to find him. And he was gone! I couldn't find him anywhere! So I asked the door guy if he'd seen a guy in a maroon v-neck leave. He said no, so I started walking back towards the back room again. Then we ended up practically running into each other at the top of the stairs. So I gave him my business card, and we chatted a bit more. He asked me what my schedule looks like and I told him it just so happens I have this week off school. Then he grimaced, and said he'll be traveling all week. Which got us talking a little bit about how he travels for work. I asked him what he does, and he said, "Well we'll talk about it. What's your Sunday look like?"
And at first I thought he said "Sundays", meaning all my Sundays, so I said my Sundays are generally free, and I usually do whatever I want, because I don't have school or work. And then I realized he meant this Sunday specifically. So hopefully that didn't make me sound desperate. And then he said, "Well let's do something on Sunday. Forget about coffee, let's do something exciting." And I laughed and said ok! And that was that! He went back to his friends, and I went back to work, and I think he left shortly afterwards, but he has my number! And I really, really hope he calls!
I have this complex where when I first meet a guy, if he seems really into me, I just think it's too good to be true. I dunno why, it just sorta puts me on my guard. Like I don't wanna get my hopes up, ya know? Because if he doesn't call, I'm gonna be really disappointed! :( But the ball is in his court. This is completely out of my control now. ((Sigh)) This is going to be a long day.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Float On
First off, thanks everyone for the comforting words. Lol. I did have a little bit of a freak out the other day, but you are all right. It was premature. And now that BJ and I have gotten past that initial hump of "Ohmygodwe'retalkingagain!" things are sort of...calming down a bit between us. Which is nice, because I don't feel as much pressure anymore. I'm just gonna try to relax and when he gets here, I'll take it from there.
Anyway, my friend, Katie, from school, has a friend coming in town in a couple weeks that she wants me to take out for drinks one night. He's her best friends older brother and they live in Cali. Alex (the guy - duh) will be here for one weekend, mid-October. She said she's not trying to set me up with him, it's just that she's underage, so she can't really take him anywhere, and he's not a big party animal, so he most likely wouldn't mesh well with most of her partying pals. She goes, "He's old like you, and he doesn't like going to clubs, he likes to go to bars and just chill." My response? "Gee thanks for reminded me that I'm so 'old'". Lol. She's so funny. But anyway, I agreed to take this guy out for drinks the Friday that he's here. Hopefully I can get the night off work. Katie said she would bring him into my bar Thursday night so we could actually meet first, that way it wouldn't be like we were meeting for the first time Friday night. And she showed me pictures of him, and he looks attractive. Also, he's tall, and she said she heard from a friend that slept with him that he has the biggest penis in the world. No, I am not joking. Lol. The timing is almost poetic. Hahaha. So again, we'll just see what happens...
OMG I just got a random text from my OTHER ex, Nate like JUST NOW. Wtf is going on in the cosmos right now!? This is so weird.... He wants to know 'how I'm doing'. Lol. Well at least I know there is absolutely NO chance of me ever getting back with him. He's too weird and awkward. Lol. G's...
I'm so tired and it's only 9:30. I'm already ready for bed. I normally would be at work, but they're doing construction downstairs so the basement bar was closed tonight. I bartend down there on Thursdays now. It's been ok so far, but kinda slow since no one really knows to come in yet. Katie has come to visit me every week so far. Haha. So that's been cool. At least I'm not fucking waiting tables on Thursdays anymore! That's a definite improvement. Well, I'm gonna try to read a little and go to sleep. I don't think I can keep my eyes open much longer.
Anyway, my friend, Katie, from school, has a friend coming in town in a couple weeks that she wants me to take out for drinks one night. He's her best friends older brother and they live in Cali. Alex (the guy - duh) will be here for one weekend, mid-October. She said she's not trying to set me up with him, it's just that she's underage, so she can't really take him anywhere, and he's not a big party animal, so he most likely wouldn't mesh well with most of her partying pals. She goes, "He's old like you, and he doesn't like going to clubs, he likes to go to bars and just chill." My response? "Gee thanks for reminded me that I'm so 'old'". Lol. She's so funny. But anyway, I agreed to take this guy out for drinks the Friday that he's here. Hopefully I can get the night off work. Katie said she would bring him into my bar Thursday night so we could actually meet first, that way it wouldn't be like we were meeting for the first time Friday night. And she showed me pictures of him, and he looks attractive. Also, he's tall, and she said she heard from a friend that slept with him that he has the biggest penis in the world. No, I am not joking. Lol. The timing is almost poetic. Hahaha. So again, we'll just see what happens...
OMG I just got a random text from my OTHER ex, Nate like JUST NOW. Wtf is going on in the cosmos right now!? This is so weird.... He wants to know 'how I'm doing'. Lol. Well at least I know there is absolutely NO chance of me ever getting back with him. He's too weird and awkward. Lol. G's...
I'm so tired and it's only 9:30. I'm already ready for bed. I normally would be at work, but they're doing construction downstairs so the basement bar was closed tonight. I bartend down there on Thursdays now. It's been ok so far, but kinda slow since no one really knows to come in yet. Katie has come to visit me every week so far. Haha. So that's been cool. At least I'm not fucking waiting tables on Thursdays anymore! That's a definite improvement. Well, I'm gonna try to read a little and go to sleep. I don't think I can keep my eyes open much longer.
Flame on muthafuckaz!
Sunday, September 23, 2012
The Weekend of Exes
Remember a couple weeks ago when Brazil sent me a friend request? Well, I accepted it. Mostly out of morbid curiosity. I just wanted to know what he wanted. Well, 2 weeks went by, and nothing happened, so I deleted him again. And then I made Abbie delete him from her friends too. So that was that.
Now let's take an even longer trip down memory lane, shall we? Remember my old boyfriend BJ? (<-- Visit this link to catch up) Well Friday morning, I had a dream about him, sorta. In the dream he had this really beautiful horse, and I wanted to show a picture of the horse to my girlfriend (can't remember who). So I had BJ's phone, and I was scrolling through his pics looking for the pic of his horse. And I came across this picture of a bunch of us at the beach, and I was in the background of this picture, adjusting my swimsuit top, and my boob was totally showing. So I was like, "OMG you have to delete this!" And he was like, "Oh well I have copies" and for some reason, in the dream, I was just like, "haha, oh well!" It was like we were together in the dream or something. I dunno, but I woke up with this...renewed interest (?) in him. And of course I had to text him about the dream immediately. And I said, "So....do you have any naked pictures of me?"
And he didn't respond for quite a long time, so I started to think maybe he was weirded out or something by my text. And then I was like, "Oh shit, maybe he thinks I want to send him some naked pics?" Lol. So I texted him again to clarify, "Fyi I wasn't offering to send you a naked pic. Lol. I just had a dream last night that you had a picture of me, in which I had a wardrobe malfunction. Lol."
And again, he didn't respond! And it's just very unlike him to ignore a text like that, especially since we recently had a brief conversation. So I sent him a facebook message, asking if he changed his number. He responded immediately with the new number. LOL.
Here's our conversation....
Me: Dude, did you change your #??
BJ: Lol yes (phone number)
Me: Omg...good to know. I texted someone something weird this morning. Hhaha!
BJ: Lol please tell me they texted you back.
Me: Haha no, that's why I messaged you! But I said, "So...do you have any naked pictures of me?" And then there was no reply so I thought maybe I freaked you out or something and I felt the need to clarify so then I wrote:
Fyi I wasn't offering to send you a naked pic. Lol. I just had a dream last night that you had a picture of me, in which I had a wardrobe malfunction. Lol.
BJ: Lol if someone would've gotten that it seriously would've made my year.
Me: I really hope so .
Anyway, it was a funny dream.
BJ: Sounds like it, I'll be there next month, pencil me in
Me: When?
BJ: Oct 26
Me: How long are you staying here? And where are you staying? Lol sorry for the 20 questions
BJ: Just for the weekend
Me: Well where are you staying?
BJ: I may get a hotel I may stay at my buddies house haven't decided
Me: Stay with MEEEE!! Lol. Who do you know that lives here?
BJ: One of my best friends from the military
Me: Oh I see. Well you're welcome to crash with me if you want. I live near wrigley field.
BJ: Uh that sounds like greatness
So that was just our facebook conversation, which we were having while I was working, so it got busy and I wasn't able to respond t.o him for a while. But later, just before I left work, I texted him, and we small talked for a while, I'll spare you the boring stuff. Eventually he brought up the dream again.
BJ: So about those naked pictures of you, should I delete them....or.....
Me: Lol. In the ream it wasn't really a naked picture. [I explain the dream]
BJ: Lol I have mixed feelings about this story. Humor, obviously, envy of Dream Me, and jealousy because this wasn't real.
Me: BAHAHAHAHA!! I have mixed feelings about it as well, bc clearly, Dream Me didn't mind that you had this pic of me, and when I woke up I had this unexplainable urge to make out with you. Haha.
BJ: Dream You needs to do all of your thinking
Me: Hahaha. Is that so??
BJ: Uh yea, I miss your face, and have for a long time.
Me: You do??? Well that honestly surprises me since we hardly saw each other when I was living in Houston.
BJ: Lol well we chose different paths, I'm not cool, trendy, or hip so I didn't know what to do when you broke up with me. I was angry and confused, but that doesn't mean my feelings ever changed.
Me: What do you mean your feelings never changed?? I broke up with you mainly bc I felt like you were in a different place in your life than I was.* You were big into the frat/college scene and I wasn't really. I mean it was fun for a while, but I was kinda trying to figure my own life/shit out at the time. Plus, you lived an hour away! And I just wasn't ready for anything serious at the time.
*Side note: Also there was also Daniel...which obviously, I didn't include in my explanation, but I was young. It was what it was.
BJ: And you weren't wrong, but that's still not what I wanted.
Me: What's not what you wanted?
BJ: Breaking up
Me: Well don't take this the wrong way or anything, but you've never been exactly forthcoming with your feelings. And you were so hostile to me afterwards that I just assumed you didn't want anything to do with me. Also, I feel the need to ask, are you drunk right now?? [It was like 3am]
BJ: No, if I get a DUI, I get fired and fuck that shit! My job is too good to lose.
Me: Lol ok just wondering.... Well I'm sorry for all that. A lot has changed since then. I am much more...I dunno what work to use, experienced/pragmatic/realistic/grown up now. I have always considered you at least a friend, if not a good friend. But I guess I've never really known your feelings/opinions.
BJ: I know what you mean, I think the same is true for both of us, and I'm very aware that I'm not forthcoming with feelings, lol. To be honest, whether you realize it or not, you know more about me than probably anybody on the planet.
Me: What??? I find that very hard to believe...
BJ: It's very true, but I'm not going to explain why or how. I think I've maxed myself out on feelings sharing.
Me: Nooooo! Lol.
BJ: Lol what you don't realize is you've always had me.
BJ: I know that's probably not what a woman wants to hear because it's not challenging but it is what it is.
Me: You might be the most self-contradicting, confusing person I've ever met. I mean...it's just hard for me to accept that as truth after you pretty much dated all my friends! And I'm not saying that to be mean, I'm saying it bc I had a huge thing for you in hs and you went after first Rikki, then Emma. And I won't even bring up the Cecilia thing, lol, but it just...doesn't make sense to me! I just...always thought you weren't that into me. Anyway, what does "challenging" have to do with anything?? I'm not 22 anymore.
BJ: Rikki was before I knew you liked me and Emma and I were always just friends. And Cecilia happened after I flew home for your birthday and found out you were making out with some other guy outside.
Me: I wasn't trying to put you on the defensive. you don't have to explain anything. That is all long in the past. I was just trying to explain why this is confusing for me. Not to mention the part where you never even hinted at any of this. You realize we fight like cats and dogs, right?? You act all macho in front of your friends, and I know it's just an act and it drives me crazy cuz I can't figure out why you act that way. And I'm confrontational and stubborn and weird and flighty and probably selfish and frustrating. This isn't exactly a 2+2=4 kind of equation. Anyway, I'm sorry for whatever pain and suffering I'm sure I caused you in the past. I hope that at least we can put all that behind us. [finally!]
BJ: But that's not even the point. Those aren't the girls who I've fought with, worked things out with and came back to for the last 12 years.
Me: You've worked things out with me bc I MADE you! I'm not the type to let go of friends easily. And I know the things we argue about are usually dumb. Definitely not worth losing a friendship over.
BJ: Everything you just say about us is 100% true, but I don't know, I really liked all of that, and I'm much less of a macho d-bag these days.
Me: Hahahaha well it's nice to know you're aware of your old habits... As for the rest, I agree, it kept things interesting. And it means a lot what you said, but I'm not sure that your feelings are really for ME, as I am now, and not just the idea of me, or the way you remember me. You have dated a lot of crazy broads, maybe I'm just the most agreeable out of all them. Lol. But really, it's been a long time since we've hung out and I'm not the same person anymore. I mean I am, but I'm not. You know?
BJ: Lol first you are not the most agreeable woman I've ever dated by a long shot, and I can imagine that you've grown and changed, that happens as we go through life, and in all reality you may such, I'm pretty sure I'm kind of lame these days, but I'm happy so screw it. And I'm visiting in a month so that'll be a chance to find out.
Me: True...but I don't want it to feel like we're putting a lot of pressure on one wkend. I am gonna have to work, ya know, it's Halloween. But we should try and catch up before then. So it's not like I'm talking to you for the first time in a million yrs.
BJ: Also, I wasn't trying to spring this on you, nor do I expect anything. These were just things I should've said a long time ago. Lol but I have a lot of plans that weekend, I was just saying we could get a meal together. No pressure at all.
Me: Well my offer still stands if you wanna stay with me. When are you flying back?
BJ: I still have to book my return ticket for Sunday.
Me: Well you should make it late. Lol. Cuz Sunday is the only day I won't have to work.
BJ: I can do that. Ok gorgeous I have to go to sleep. Sweet dreams.
BJ: Dream about sending me naked pictures, or just do. Lol.
Me: (: Night
So that was that conversation.
MIND IS BLOWN.
Right?? I mean I'm still trying to sort through all this. Mostly I can't figure out how I really feel about it, about him, because on the one hand, there's excitement you know, and it feels good to hear things like that from someone. But I don't know if I actually want to pursue this or not. And if he really feels that way about me, I don't want to lead him on either. Because I do really care about him as a friend, regardless of our romantic status. ((Sigh)) So confusing. We texted a bit today as well. So I know he wasn't just drunk word-vomiting Friday night.
Despite the quagmire that is my feelings, I'm not gonna lie, I feel...happy about it. Thoughts? Opinions? Advice?? Anyone???
Ok, now for tonight, Saturday night. Went to work, and it was me, Abbie and Warren as usual. Well around 11ish, Warren disappeared into the office to do some server closeouts and it's just me and Abbie behind the bar. And it's just starting to really get busy when GUESS WHO WALKS UP TO THE BAR??
If you guessed Brazil, you would be correct.
I just looked up and there he was, right in front of me, and I said, "What the fuck!" because I was surprised. And he was like ,"What, am I not allowed to be here?" And I said, "What? I didn't say that..."
And then he said, "You pretty much said that."
And I said, "No, I just said 'What the fuck' because you surprised me."
Then he asked how I was doing (great!) and how is Jasper and where am I living. And I was trying to be...unaffected and as nice as possible. But it was just so awkward! Finally he took his 2 beers and left, and we were busy so I had enough to be getting on with. He and his friend lurked in front of the bar until some people got up and then they sat down and stayed for at least an hour. I completely ignored him. I served drinks to people on either sides of him without even making eye contact with him. I just pretended he wasn't there pretty much. He made another attempt to talk to me once when I walked by. He asked how I was doing, and I just said, "Fine, just busy working" and walked away.
Then finally, Warren comes back from the office just as Brazil is about to leave. And he's standing at the end of the bar, obviously waiting to say goodbye to me, but I just kept ignoring him, and eventually he left. And Warren goes, "Hey was that that guy that-"
"Yes," I interrupted him before he could make fun of me, "I don't know what he was doing here, I'm just glad he's finally gone."
"He was here trying to get laid." Warren said.
And then I told him that after our initial encounter at the bar, I seriously doubted that he thought he was gonna get laid. But Warren just said, "Guys are dumb. He probably still hopes he's gonna get laid." And I was just like, "You've gotta be fucking kidding me, I mean, no way!"
Well very shortly after that, Brazil texted me.
"Hey, sorry if it was akward (yes, he spelled it wrong) of me showing up out of nowhere today. Anyways, it was good to see you"
So I show Warren the text and he's like "I told you!" and then I was like, "Well what should I say??"
Well Warren had this awesome idea, which I am proud to say I used. Lol. Here is what I responded with:
Me: It was just really busy. So are you busy later?
Brazil: Im just at home now, surfing the web n stuff.. I guess that means .. Not busy?
Me: Wanna hang out when I get off work?
Brazil: For sure, if by any chance I don't respond is probably cause im passed out sleeping.
Brazil: But anyways, u have idea whne u will be done? Dont mean to bother, i know ur really busy
Me: Oh wait, hang on...I just remembered you're THE DOUCHEST BAG. But you're welcome at [our bar] anytime. Sweet dreams.
Brazil: That was unecessary, and you know it's not true.. Not cool peyton. You have no reason to say that to me, even if you think you do. Anyway, i hope ur doing fine, I'll disregard the insults.
A couple minutes go by...
Brazil: Douchest bag ever? WTF?
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAA!!!!!
I'm sorry, I know it was terrible, and immature, yada yada, but it just felt soooo good!! And me and Warren seriously laughed about it for at least 20 minutes. It definitely made my night. ((Sigh))
I didn't respond to him any more after that. It was just great. I just can't believe he was dumb enough to think that after I deleted him from my friends TWICE, and then completely ignored him at the bar, he thought I would wanna go over to his place?? In the words of Ron Weasley, "How thick can you get?"
LOL.
Also on a side note, it's really hard for me to type all his misspellings. Lol. Idiot.
Anyway, this is has been one interesting weekend. On another unrelated note, I gave my number to a hot guy on Friday night. Perhaps I'll hear from him, perhaps I won't? Meh...
Anyway, I really could use some advice on the BJ situation? I mean I'm gonna see him in about a month, but I don't wanna like...invest too much into that right now because it just seems kind of silly. I dunno... Let me know what you all think.
Now let's take an even longer trip down memory lane, shall we? Remember my old boyfriend BJ? (<-- Visit this link to catch up) Well Friday morning, I had a dream about him, sorta. In the dream he had this really beautiful horse, and I wanted to show a picture of the horse to my girlfriend (can't remember who). So I had BJ's phone, and I was scrolling through his pics looking for the pic of his horse. And I came across this picture of a bunch of us at the beach, and I was in the background of this picture, adjusting my swimsuit top, and my boob was totally showing. So I was like, "OMG you have to delete this!" And he was like, "Oh well I have copies" and for some reason, in the dream, I was just like, "haha, oh well!" It was like we were together in the dream or something. I dunno, but I woke up with this...renewed interest (?) in him. And of course I had to text him about the dream immediately. And I said, "So....do you have any naked pictures of me?"
And he didn't respond for quite a long time, so I started to think maybe he was weirded out or something by my text. And then I was like, "Oh shit, maybe he thinks I want to send him some naked pics?" Lol. So I texted him again to clarify, "Fyi I wasn't offering to send you a naked pic. Lol. I just had a dream last night that you had a picture of me, in which I had a wardrobe malfunction. Lol."
And again, he didn't respond! And it's just very unlike him to ignore a text like that, especially since we recently had a brief conversation. So I sent him a facebook message, asking if he changed his number. He responded immediately with the new number. LOL.
Here's our conversation....
Me: Dude, did you change your #??
BJ: Lol yes (phone number)
Me: Omg...good to know. I texted someone something weird this morning. Hhaha!
BJ: Lol please tell me they texted you back.
Me: Haha no, that's why I messaged you! But I said, "So...do you have any naked pictures of me?" And then there was no reply so I thought maybe I freaked you out or something and I felt the need to clarify so then I wrote:
Fyi I wasn't offering to send you a naked pic. Lol. I just had a dream last night that you had a picture of me, in which I had a wardrobe malfunction. Lol.
BJ: Lol if someone would've gotten that it seriously would've made my year.
Me: I really hope so .
Anyway, it was a funny dream.
BJ: Sounds like it, I'll be there next month, pencil me in
Me: When?
BJ: Oct 26
Me: How long are you staying here? And where are you staying? Lol sorry for the 20 questions
BJ: Just for the weekend
Me: Well where are you staying?
BJ: I may get a hotel I may stay at my buddies house haven't decided
Me: Stay with MEEEE!! Lol. Who do you know that lives here?
BJ: One of my best friends from the military
Me: Oh I see. Well you're welcome to crash with me if you want. I live near wrigley field.
BJ: Uh that sounds like greatness
So that was just our facebook conversation, which we were having while I was working, so it got busy and I wasn't able to respond t.o him for a while. But later, just before I left work, I texted him, and we small talked for a while, I'll spare you the boring stuff. Eventually he brought up the dream again.
BJ: So about those naked pictures of you, should I delete them....or.....
Me: Lol. In the ream it wasn't really a naked picture. [I explain the dream]
BJ: Lol I have mixed feelings about this story. Humor, obviously, envy of Dream Me, and jealousy because this wasn't real.
Me: BAHAHAHAHA!! I have mixed feelings about it as well, bc clearly, Dream Me didn't mind that you had this pic of me, and when I woke up I had this unexplainable urge to make out with you. Haha.
BJ: Dream You needs to do all of your thinking
Me: Hahaha. Is that so??
BJ: Uh yea, I miss your face, and have for a long time.
Me: You do??? Well that honestly surprises me since we hardly saw each other when I was living in Houston.
BJ: Lol well we chose different paths, I'm not cool, trendy, or hip so I didn't know what to do when you broke up with me. I was angry and confused, but that doesn't mean my feelings ever changed.
Me: What do you mean your feelings never changed?? I broke up with you mainly bc I felt like you were in a different place in your life than I was.* You were big into the frat/college scene and I wasn't really. I mean it was fun for a while, but I was kinda trying to figure my own life/shit out at the time. Plus, you lived an hour away! And I just wasn't ready for anything serious at the time.
*Side note: Also there was also Daniel...which obviously, I didn't include in my explanation, but I was young. It was what it was.
BJ: And you weren't wrong, but that's still not what I wanted.
Me: What's not what you wanted?
BJ: Breaking up
Me: Well don't take this the wrong way or anything, but you've never been exactly forthcoming with your feelings. And you were so hostile to me afterwards that I just assumed you didn't want anything to do with me. Also, I feel the need to ask, are you drunk right now?? [It was like 3am]
BJ: No, if I get a DUI, I get fired and fuck that shit! My job is too good to lose.
Me: Lol ok just wondering.... Well I'm sorry for all that. A lot has changed since then. I am much more...I dunno what work to use, experienced/pragmatic/realistic/grown up now. I have always considered you at least a friend, if not a good friend. But I guess I've never really known your feelings/opinions.
BJ: I know what you mean, I think the same is true for both of us, and I'm very aware that I'm not forthcoming with feelings, lol. To be honest, whether you realize it or not, you know more about me than probably anybody on the planet.
Me: What??? I find that very hard to believe...
BJ: It's very true, but I'm not going to explain why or how. I think I've maxed myself out on feelings sharing.
Me: Nooooo! Lol.
BJ: Lol what you don't realize is you've always had me.
BJ: I know that's probably not what a woman wants to hear because it's not challenging but it is what it is.
Me: You might be the most self-contradicting, confusing person I've ever met. I mean...it's just hard for me to accept that as truth after you pretty much dated all my friends! And I'm not saying that to be mean, I'm saying it bc I had a huge thing for you in hs and you went after first Rikki, then Emma. And I won't even bring up the Cecilia thing, lol, but it just...doesn't make sense to me! I just...always thought you weren't that into me. Anyway, what does "challenging" have to do with anything?? I'm not 22 anymore.
BJ: Rikki was before I knew you liked me and Emma and I were always just friends. And Cecilia happened after I flew home for your birthday and found out you were making out with some other guy outside.
Me: I wasn't trying to put you on the defensive. you don't have to explain anything. That is all long in the past. I was just trying to explain why this is confusing for me. Not to mention the part where you never even hinted at any of this. You realize we fight like cats and dogs, right?? You act all macho in front of your friends, and I know it's just an act and it drives me crazy cuz I can't figure out why you act that way. And I'm confrontational and stubborn and weird and flighty and probably selfish and frustrating. This isn't exactly a 2+2=4 kind of equation. Anyway, I'm sorry for whatever pain and suffering I'm sure I caused you in the past. I hope that at least we can put all that behind us. [finally!]
BJ: But that's not even the point. Those aren't the girls who I've fought with, worked things out with and came back to for the last 12 years.
Me: You've worked things out with me bc I MADE you! I'm not the type to let go of friends easily. And I know the things we argue about are usually dumb. Definitely not worth losing a friendship over.
BJ: Everything you just say about us is 100% true, but I don't know, I really liked all of that, and I'm much less of a macho d-bag these days.
Me: Hahahaha well it's nice to know you're aware of your old habits... As for the rest, I agree, it kept things interesting. And it means a lot what you said, but I'm not sure that your feelings are really for ME, as I am now, and not just the idea of me, or the way you remember me. You have dated a lot of crazy broads, maybe I'm just the most agreeable out of all them. Lol. But really, it's been a long time since we've hung out and I'm not the same person anymore. I mean I am, but I'm not. You know?
BJ: Lol first you are not the most agreeable woman I've ever dated by a long shot, and I can imagine that you've grown and changed, that happens as we go through life, and in all reality you may such, I'm pretty sure I'm kind of lame these days, but I'm happy so screw it. And I'm visiting in a month so that'll be a chance to find out.
Me: True...but I don't want it to feel like we're putting a lot of pressure on one wkend. I am gonna have to work, ya know, it's Halloween. But we should try and catch up before then. So it's not like I'm talking to you for the first time in a million yrs.
BJ: Also, I wasn't trying to spring this on you, nor do I expect anything. These were just things I should've said a long time ago. Lol but I have a lot of plans that weekend, I was just saying we could get a meal together. No pressure at all.
Me: Well my offer still stands if you wanna stay with me. When are you flying back?
BJ: I still have to book my return ticket for Sunday.
Me: Well you should make it late. Lol. Cuz Sunday is the only day I won't have to work.
BJ: I can do that. Ok gorgeous I have to go to sleep. Sweet dreams.
BJ: Dream about sending me naked pictures, or just do. Lol.
Me: (: Night
So that was that conversation.
MIND IS BLOWN.
Right?? I mean I'm still trying to sort through all this. Mostly I can't figure out how I really feel about it, about him, because on the one hand, there's excitement you know, and it feels good to hear things like that from someone. But I don't know if I actually want to pursue this or not. And if he really feels that way about me, I don't want to lead him on either. Because I do really care about him as a friend, regardless of our romantic status. ((Sigh)) So confusing. We texted a bit today as well. So I know he wasn't just drunk word-vomiting Friday night.
Despite the quagmire that is my feelings, I'm not gonna lie, I feel...happy about it. Thoughts? Opinions? Advice?? Anyone???
Ok, now for tonight, Saturday night. Went to work, and it was me, Abbie and Warren as usual. Well around 11ish, Warren disappeared into the office to do some server closeouts and it's just me and Abbie behind the bar. And it's just starting to really get busy when GUESS WHO WALKS UP TO THE BAR??
If you guessed Brazil, you would be correct.
I just looked up and there he was, right in front of me, and I said, "What the fuck!" because I was surprised. And he was like ,"What, am I not allowed to be here?" And I said, "What? I didn't say that..."
And then he said, "You pretty much said that."
And I said, "No, I just said 'What the fuck' because you surprised me."
Then he asked how I was doing (great!) and how is Jasper and where am I living. And I was trying to be...unaffected and as nice as possible. But it was just so awkward! Finally he took his 2 beers and left, and we were busy so I had enough to be getting on with. He and his friend lurked in front of the bar until some people got up and then they sat down and stayed for at least an hour. I completely ignored him. I served drinks to people on either sides of him without even making eye contact with him. I just pretended he wasn't there pretty much. He made another attempt to talk to me once when I walked by. He asked how I was doing, and I just said, "Fine, just busy working" and walked away.
Then finally, Warren comes back from the office just as Brazil is about to leave. And he's standing at the end of the bar, obviously waiting to say goodbye to me, but I just kept ignoring him, and eventually he left. And Warren goes, "Hey was that that guy that-"
"Yes," I interrupted him before he could make fun of me, "I don't know what he was doing here, I'm just glad he's finally gone."
"He was here trying to get laid." Warren said.
And then I told him that after our initial encounter at the bar, I seriously doubted that he thought he was gonna get laid. But Warren just said, "Guys are dumb. He probably still hopes he's gonna get laid." And I was just like, "You've gotta be fucking kidding me, I mean, no way!"
Well very shortly after that, Brazil texted me.
"Hey, sorry if it was akward (yes, he spelled it wrong) of me showing up out of nowhere today. Anyways, it was good to see you"
So I show Warren the text and he's like "I told you!" and then I was like, "Well what should I say??"
Well Warren had this awesome idea, which I am proud to say I used. Lol. Here is what I responded with:
Me: It was just really busy. So are you busy later?
Brazil: Im just at home now, surfing the web n stuff.. I guess that means .. Not busy?
Me: Wanna hang out when I get off work?
Brazil: For sure, if by any chance I don't respond is probably cause im passed out sleeping.
Brazil: But anyways, u have idea whne u will be done? Dont mean to bother, i know ur really busy
Me: Oh wait, hang on...I just remembered you're THE DOUCHEST BAG. But you're welcome at [our bar] anytime. Sweet dreams.
Brazil: That was unecessary, and you know it's not true.. Not cool peyton. You have no reason to say that to me, even if you think you do. Anyway, i hope ur doing fine, I'll disregard the insults.
A couple minutes go by...
Brazil: Douchest bag ever? WTF?
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAA!!!!!
I'm sorry, I know it was terrible, and immature, yada yada, but it just felt soooo good!! And me and Warren seriously laughed about it for at least 20 minutes. It definitely made my night. ((Sigh))
I didn't respond to him any more after that. It was just great. I just can't believe he was dumb enough to think that after I deleted him from my friends TWICE, and then completely ignored him at the bar, he thought I would wanna go over to his place?? In the words of Ron Weasley, "How thick can you get?"
LOL.
Also on a side note, it's really hard for me to type all his misspellings. Lol. Idiot.
Anyway, this is has been one interesting weekend. On another unrelated note, I gave my number to a hot guy on Friday night. Perhaps I'll hear from him, perhaps I won't? Meh...
Anyway, I really could use some advice on the BJ situation? I mean I'm gonna see him in about a month, but I don't wanna like...invest too much into that right now because it just seems kind of silly. I dunno... Let me know what you all think.
Flame on, muthafuckaz!
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Felix the Fuckwad
Well it's been slow going the last couple of weeks, but I have a few things to report...
Work stuff. There's been a lot more drama than usual going on at work, starting with Felix, my new LEAST favorite person at work. Ugh. But before I get to that, I have to tell you that the week after next, the staff is taking a trip to Wisconsin! Which I am really excited about, but before I get to that, I have to tell you what happened with Felix. I'll start from the beginning of that story...
So you all know I've been bartending for many years, and when I started working at my current bar, I agreed to take a couple serving shifts while the owner made some scheduling adjustments to get some bar shifts. Well it's been a little over a year, and I'm still only bartending once a week, which I am not happy about. And I'm getting frustrated about it too, because once school starts, I'm gonna have to give up my Thursday shift because of class. Which means I'll only be working 2 shifts a week, and I just don't think that's gonna cut it for me. So I've sort of been toying with the idea of looking for another job, possibly. But, that's just background info. So anyways, Felix is one of the bartenders, and he also makes the schedule, so he's technically a bartender/manager, even though all he does is make the schedule. He also happens to be one of the worst bartenders we have because A) he is the least experienced, B) he's slow C) he's not very good at multitasking and D) he gets easily flustered and frustrated when it gets busy. So instead of putting his head down and busting his ass, he freaks out and tends to snap at people. Ugh. Needless to say, it's hard to respect someone like that, even if he is in a position of superiority.
A couple weeks ago Felix sent out a email to all the staff asking for volunteers to work this event on a Sunday. I volunteered to bartend, and he responded telling me that the bartending slot had already been filled, but that he still needed servers if I was interested. Well I wasn't interested, so I didn't respond. I only volunteered to bartend because he said it was going to be a cash bar, whereas the servers would just be serving plates of food which was included in a flat rate tickets. Meaning, they probably wouldn't make any money.
So a week later, Felix writes me back again:
Hi Peyton,
I wanted to follow-up with you on this. Given your availability on this date, I will need to schedule you to serve as I am still in need of 2 servers. Should things change with the bartenders, you will be the first to move into that role. I expect this to be a lucrative shift for both servers and bartenders alike. Thank you for your understanding and I appreciate you being available.
-Felix
Are you fucking kidding me?! After a week, during which I've made plans, you're just TELLING me I have to work this stupid event! He didn't even ask! He just fucking scheduled me. The fucking bastard. <-- That was my initial reaction. But then I thought about it, and I was like, "You know what? I could get mad and tell him no, or I could just suck it up and work. I need the money anyway. So I wrote him back, "Ok, no problem." Ugh.
Then the following week, I was talking with some of my other coworkers about it, because no one else had volunteered to work! DUH because they all had the same thought that I had, which is that the servers weren't going to make any money. So I decided to write Felix another email. And before I sent it, I had one of the other servers read it, just to make sure it was ok to send. This is what it said:
Hey Felix,
Quick question: Are the servers going to be tipped out for this event?? Because in my experience, usually when there's a flat rate people don't really tip and I don't wanna come in and just work for free, ya know? So I'm just curious why you think its going to be a lucrative shift. I don't mean to sound bitchy, but at the end of the day, that's kinda what counts. And I know a couple other servers who are hesitant to volunteer for this reason. So just wondering what the deal is.
Thanks,
Peyton
Keep in mind that I was writing this to a fellow bartender and peer... Well several days go by and he never bothers responding, and the other girls are asking me what the deal is, etc. And I'm like, "I don't know, he never responded."
Then finally, last Thursday I got this email, FROM MY BOSS, Caleb (the owner):
I've been in discussion with Felix regarding your concerns about serving for the event on Sun July 22nd. To be frank, I don't think you're being bitchy with the concerns about tip money, but I do think that you are being contradictory, ignorant, and short sighted with that thought process.
Contradictory in that you shared with me on Tuesday that you are broke, so I imagine any money is better than none at all.
Ignorant in that if I selfishly made every decision at [bar] strictly on finances and profitability, as seems to be your main concern about 7/22, that the workplace you are currently employed in would be far less desirable than it is, while most certainly more profitable for me.
Short sighted in that just days ago I sent an email regarding an employee trip and how [bar] functions as a whole. Please let me know of the last bar that you worked at that closed for 3 days for an employee trip. Even with the generosity of Ronnie's parents to let us use their cabin, it will be quite an expense that I'd like to think is going to be appreciated and rewarding.
Safe to say that I was surprised, hurt, and disturbed by your concerns. Even more so when you had alluded to other servers sharing this same concern, leading me to think that I am ignorant to a budding problem at [bar]. I consider myself to be an approachable owner & manager, and would hope that if you had any legitimate concerns, financial or otherwise, that you would speak to me about them before passing a blanket judgement.
To directly answer your question about the event, I will be sure that all workers leave with an appropriate amount of money for their services on 7/22, including adding money collected from ticket sales to whatever individual tips are left by customers. Due to a lack of ticket sales, and a disappointing lack of support from the neighborhood association who benefit most by our hosting this event, the event may be cancelled. If the event is confirmed for 7/22, I would expect and appreciate your help that night.
Lastly, please do not be angry with Felix sharing your email with me. As a manager, it is his job to do so.
I'll be in Sat with my family, but would rather not discuss this at that time. If you want to discuss on the phone before I return to work on Thus 7/19, let me know and I'll arrange it.
Needless to say I was totally shocked to receive that, and the more I thought about it, the more angry I became. First of all, I think Caleb's response was a complete overreaction, and way out of line, and just plain MEAN. Secondly, I think Felix is a little BITCH! Fucking whining to Caleb, practically hiding behind his mummy's skirts because he can't deal with shit himself. I mean if I was going to send an email to Caleb I would have worded it WAY differently! But I know it's my own fault, and I should be more conscientious of what I put in writing, since I have been known to get myself in trouble for that in the past.
I just hate passive aggressive people! Fucking grow a pair!!! UUUUUUUUUGGGGGH!!!!
Well I wrote Caleb back, apologized for offending him, and explained that I think it was just a misunderstanding, and that perhaps I am ignorant about how these events are run, and that I just wanted to be kept informed. And I told him that we do appreciate everything he does for us.
(Despite the fact that I think it's fucked up he was trying to throw the staff trip back in my face when:
1) it's supposed to be his way of thanking us as his employees, and showing his appreciation to us, not the other way around, and
2) back in Houston, we took employee trips twice a year! Not once every 4, which is pretty much what it's like here, but whatever...)
Then Caleb wrote me back, "Thanks, I appreciate it, we'll chat on Thursday", which is tomorrow.
So when I talk to him tomorrow I'm going to tell him that Felix basically forced me into working it, and that I had to cancel my plans, and that I was pissed about it. I mean if you ask people to volunteer for something, and then they do, and then you basically punish them for it, that's just...fucked up! And of course I won't say it in those words, but I'm just so fucking pissed about this whole situation because if Felix wasn't such a FUCKING PUSSY none of this would have happened!!
So now I'm back to thinking about getting a new job, as much as I cringe at the idea of job hunting, it just kinda seems like a good idea right now. I just feel like Caleb has gotten the complete wrong impression of me, and the fact that I'm still waiting tables is not helping.
But the staff trip is happening in a couple weeks, and Ronnie's parents have a cabin on Green Bay that we're gonna all stay at, and it should be a lot of fun. There aren't any boys I work with who I'm even remotely interested in though, which means there will be no romance. Booo. Oh well. Abbie, Ronnie and I will have girl time.
So that's what's up with me! Sorry it's been so long!
Work stuff. There's been a lot more drama than usual going on at work, starting with Felix, my new LEAST favorite person at work. Ugh. But before I get to that, I have to tell you that the week after next, the staff is taking a trip to Wisconsin! Which I am really excited about, but before I get to that, I have to tell you what happened with Felix. I'll start from the beginning of that story...
So you all know I've been bartending for many years, and when I started working at my current bar, I agreed to take a couple serving shifts while the owner made some scheduling adjustments to get some bar shifts. Well it's been a little over a year, and I'm still only bartending once a week, which I am not happy about. And I'm getting frustrated about it too, because once school starts, I'm gonna have to give up my Thursday shift because of class. Which means I'll only be working 2 shifts a week, and I just don't think that's gonna cut it for me. So I've sort of been toying with the idea of looking for another job, possibly. But, that's just background info. So anyways, Felix is one of the bartenders, and he also makes the schedule, so he's technically a bartender/manager, even though all he does is make the schedule. He also happens to be one of the worst bartenders we have because A) he is the least experienced, B) he's slow C) he's not very good at multitasking and D) he gets easily flustered and frustrated when it gets busy. So instead of putting his head down and busting his ass, he freaks out and tends to snap at people. Ugh. Needless to say, it's hard to respect someone like that, even if he is in a position of superiority.
A couple weeks ago Felix sent out a email to all the staff asking for volunteers to work this event on a Sunday. I volunteered to bartend, and he responded telling me that the bartending slot had already been filled, but that he still needed servers if I was interested. Well I wasn't interested, so I didn't respond. I only volunteered to bartend because he said it was going to be a cash bar, whereas the servers would just be serving plates of food which was included in a flat rate tickets. Meaning, they probably wouldn't make any money.
So a week later, Felix writes me back again:
Hi Peyton,
I wanted to follow-up with you on this. Given your availability on this date, I will need to schedule you to serve as I am still in need of 2 servers. Should things change with the bartenders, you will be the first to move into that role. I expect this to be a lucrative shift for both servers and bartenders alike. Thank you for your understanding and I appreciate you being available.
-Felix
Are you fucking kidding me?! After a week, during which I've made plans, you're just TELLING me I have to work this stupid event! He didn't even ask! He just fucking scheduled me. The fucking bastard. <-- That was my initial reaction. But then I thought about it, and I was like, "You know what? I could get mad and tell him no, or I could just suck it up and work. I need the money anyway. So I wrote him back, "Ok, no problem." Ugh.
Then the following week, I was talking with some of my other coworkers about it, because no one else had volunteered to work! DUH because they all had the same thought that I had, which is that the servers weren't going to make any money. So I decided to write Felix another email. And before I sent it, I had one of the other servers read it, just to make sure it was ok to send. This is what it said:
Hey Felix,
Quick question: Are the servers going to be tipped out for this event?? Because in my experience, usually when there's a flat rate people don't really tip and I don't wanna come in and just work for free, ya know? So I'm just curious why you think its going to be a lucrative shift. I don't mean to sound bitchy, but at the end of the day, that's kinda what counts. And I know a couple other servers who are hesitant to volunteer for this reason. So just wondering what the deal is.
Thanks,
Peyton
Keep in mind that I was writing this to a fellow bartender and peer... Well several days go by and he never bothers responding, and the other girls are asking me what the deal is, etc. And I'm like, "I don't know, he never responded."
Then finally, last Thursday I got this email, FROM MY BOSS, Caleb (the owner):
I've been in discussion with Felix regarding your concerns about serving for the event on Sun July 22nd. To be frank, I don't think you're being bitchy with the concerns about tip money, but I do think that you are being contradictory, ignorant, and short sighted with that thought process.
Contradictory in that you shared with me on Tuesday that you are broke, so I imagine any money is better than none at all.
Ignorant in that if I selfishly made every decision at [bar] strictly on finances and profitability, as seems to be your main concern about 7/22, that the workplace you are currently employed in would be far less desirable than it is, while most certainly more profitable for me.
Short sighted in that just days ago I sent an email regarding an employee trip and how [bar] functions as a whole. Please let me know of the last bar that you worked at that closed for 3 days for an employee trip. Even with the generosity of Ronnie's parents to let us use their cabin, it will be quite an expense that I'd like to think is going to be appreciated and rewarding.
Safe to say that I was surprised, hurt, and disturbed by your concerns. Even more so when you had alluded to other servers sharing this same concern, leading me to think that I am ignorant to a budding problem at [bar]. I consider myself to be an approachable owner & manager, and would hope that if you had any legitimate concerns, financial or otherwise, that you would speak to me about them before passing a blanket judgement.
To directly answer your question about the event, I will be sure that all workers leave with an appropriate amount of money for their services on 7/22, including adding money collected from ticket sales to whatever individual tips are left by customers. Due to a lack of ticket sales, and a disappointing lack of support from the neighborhood association who benefit most by our hosting this event, the event may be cancelled. If the event is confirmed for 7/22, I would expect and appreciate your help that night.
Lastly, please do not be angry with Felix sharing your email with me. As a manager, it is his job to do so.
I'll be in Sat with my family, but would rather not discuss this at that time. If you want to discuss on the phone before I return to work on Thus 7/19, let me know and I'll arrange it.
Needless to say I was totally shocked to receive that, and the more I thought about it, the more angry I became. First of all, I think Caleb's response was a complete overreaction, and way out of line, and just plain MEAN. Secondly, I think Felix is a little BITCH! Fucking whining to Caleb, practically hiding behind his mummy's skirts because he can't deal with shit himself. I mean if I was going to send an email to Caleb I would have worded it WAY differently! But I know it's my own fault, and I should be more conscientious of what I put in writing, since I have been known to get myself in trouble for that in the past.
I just hate passive aggressive people! Fucking grow a pair!!! UUUUUUUUUGGGGGH!!!!
Well I wrote Caleb back, apologized for offending him, and explained that I think it was just a misunderstanding, and that perhaps I am ignorant about how these events are run, and that I just wanted to be kept informed. And I told him that we do appreciate everything he does for us.
(Despite the fact that I think it's fucked up he was trying to throw the staff trip back in my face when:
1) it's supposed to be his way of thanking us as his employees, and showing his appreciation to us, not the other way around, and
2) back in Houston, we took employee trips twice a year! Not once every 4, which is pretty much what it's like here, but whatever...)
Then Caleb wrote me back, "Thanks, I appreciate it, we'll chat on Thursday", which is tomorrow.
So when I talk to him tomorrow I'm going to tell him that Felix basically forced me into working it, and that I had to cancel my plans, and that I was pissed about it. I mean if you ask people to volunteer for something, and then they do, and then you basically punish them for it, that's just...fucked up! And of course I won't say it in those words, but I'm just so fucking pissed about this whole situation because if Felix wasn't such a FUCKING PUSSY none of this would have happened!!
So now I'm back to thinking about getting a new job, as much as I cringe at the idea of job hunting, it just kinda seems like a good idea right now. I just feel like Caleb has gotten the complete wrong impression of me, and the fact that I'm still waiting tables is not helping.
But the staff trip is happening in a couple weeks, and Ronnie's parents have a cabin on Green Bay that we're gonna all stay at, and it should be a lot of fun. There aren't any boys I work with who I'm even remotely interested in though, which means there will be no romance. Booo. Oh well. Abbie, Ronnie and I will have girl time.
So that's what's up with me! Sorry it's been so long!
Friday, January 13, 2012
Put Out
Well I tried calling Evan once last night, and once today and he still hasn't answered. I left him a funny message today though so maybe...
Last night Matt and I made some tentative plans. I asked what he was doing, and he said he had a work dinner thing, but that he was free after, and he didn't think it would last too long. So I told him I might be out, and to text me if he wanted to meet up. He said, "For sure, I'll keep you posted."
So then I went and showered, put on makeup and fixed my hair, and he ended up not texting me again till 12:30am! He said his work thing ran late and he was just gonna go home and go to bed. I was already in bed by that point cuz I got so tired. So of course, I got all ready to go for no reason and ended up just staying home. I thought maybe I'd hear from him today, but I didn't. :(
I'm still hoping that maybe he'll show up at the bar sometime this weekend though. Everyone keep your fingers crossed for me! I'm at the point now where this whole thing with Matt could go south, really quick. As in, if I don't hear from him soon, I'm gonna just assume he's not interested and forget about him. At least...try to forget about him. But I'm gonna make sure I look really hot at work this weekend just in case.
I am actually really looking forward to Brazil coming home. He gets in on Saturday, as opposed to Sunday as I had originally thought, so he said he might stop by the bar that night, if he isn't too tired from the flight. Just one more reason to look superhot for work this weekend! At least one of them better show up! I'm so sick of going out of my way to do shit for guys when nothing comes out of it. i.e. getting waxed and going back on birth control before I went home for Christmas so that Gavin and I could hook up which never happened!!! I'm still pissed off about that, and I'm just done. I mean we had a great thing going for a while there, but I'm not going to let anyone continuously blow me off and then expect me to just be available at their earliest convenience. Fuck that!
That's the one good thing about Brazil. I feel comfortable enough with him now that I can really tell it like it is. And if he really likes me then he's going to have to satisfy some of my uneasiness and answer some of my questions. But he knows I'm a pretty no-nonsense person, and so far it hasn't scared him off. I just hope it isn't awkward, or disappointing when we finally see each other again. I guess I'll know after this weekend. If I don't see him Saturday, I'm sure I'll see him Sunday.
Well I'm off to bed. The sky has been vomiting snow all day and I still haven't warmed up from my walk home from the train. My covers are beckoning...
Last night Matt and I made some tentative plans. I asked what he was doing, and he said he had a work dinner thing, but that he was free after, and he didn't think it would last too long. So I told him I might be out, and to text me if he wanted to meet up. He said, "For sure, I'll keep you posted."
So then I went and showered, put on makeup and fixed my hair, and he ended up not texting me again till 12:30am! He said his work thing ran late and he was just gonna go home and go to bed. I was already in bed by that point cuz I got so tired. So of course, I got all ready to go for no reason and ended up just staying home. I thought maybe I'd hear from him today, but I didn't. :(
I'm still hoping that maybe he'll show up at the bar sometime this weekend though. Everyone keep your fingers crossed for me! I'm at the point now where this whole thing with Matt could go south, really quick. As in, if I don't hear from him soon, I'm gonna just assume he's not interested and forget about him. At least...try to forget about him. But I'm gonna make sure I look really hot at work this weekend just in case.
I am actually really looking forward to Brazil coming home. He gets in on Saturday, as opposed to Sunday as I had originally thought, so he said he might stop by the bar that night, if he isn't too tired from the flight. Just one more reason to look superhot for work this weekend! At least one of them better show up! I'm so sick of going out of my way to do shit for guys when nothing comes out of it. i.e. getting waxed and going back on birth control before I went home for Christmas so that Gavin and I could hook up which never happened!!! I'm still pissed off about that, and I'm just done. I mean we had a great thing going for a while there, but I'm not going to let anyone continuously blow me off and then expect me to just be available at their earliest convenience. Fuck that!
That's the one good thing about Brazil. I feel comfortable enough with him now that I can really tell it like it is. And if he really likes me then he's going to have to satisfy some of my uneasiness and answer some of my questions. But he knows I'm a pretty no-nonsense person, and so far it hasn't scared him off. I just hope it isn't awkward, or disappointing when we finally see each other again. I guess I'll know after this weekend. If I don't see him Saturday, I'm sure I'll see him Sunday.
Well I'm off to bed. The sky has been vomiting snow all day and I still haven't warmed up from my walk home from the train. My covers are beckoning...
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Hottie #1 and Hottie #2
OH.MYGOD.
Just earlier today I was telling one of the new waitresses at my bar how I'm beginning to feel like Chicago might be a wasteland as far as guys are concerned.
And then I met not one, but two hot guys in one night!!
The first hottie was sitting with about 5 other dudes at one of my tables. They were all friends with one of the doorguys. He wasn't super tall, but he was still taller than me, dark brown hair, and dimples. Really nice, and cute. And at the end of the night, they wanted to play credit card roulette. For those of you who aren't familiar with this game, everyone at the table puts their credit card in a hat, and then someone, usually the waiter or bartender, blindly draws credit cards out of the hat until there's only one left. Whichever card is the last one in the hat, that person has to pay for the whole bill. So I was drawing out the cards, and the cute guy ended up being the one who had to pay. I felt so bad! Lol. So when I closed him out, I wrote him a little note that said,
And I also bought him a shot. I figured what the hell, I mean it's been FOREVER since I've been with any guy, what have I got to lose!?
[Quick side note! DID NOT hook up with Gavin when I was at home. OVER IT. But that's another story...]
So anyway, after they all left, I went over to the doorguy who was friends with all of them to get the deets. And he told me that Hottie #1 lives in D.C.!!! ((Sigh)) Disappointing, but oh well.
So the second hot guy came along about an hour and a half later. I had just walked over to the waitress well for a breather, and he was there in the corner with 3 friends, all guys. I didn't really pay him much attention, because I usually ignore anyone standing close to the waitress well, in order to discourage them from invading my space. It SUCKS when people crowd the waitress well and it makes it practically impossible for me to do my job. So I get a little territorial. But anyway, he turns to me and says, "Can you tell me if you guys have any triple hops brewed beer?"
And my initial thought was that he was looking for a real hoppy beer, like an IPA or something, so I started listing off our PAs and such.
Then he laughed and went on to explain that he was joking, and that Miller Lite is actually advertised as being triple hops brewed. So that just kind of opened up a conversation window, and he continued to talk to me and I continued to stand there and be entertained. I also began to notice how incredibly good looking he was.
I would say he looks like a cross between this guy:
and this guy:
SUPER HOT RIGHT?!?
But that immediately put me on my guard, because generally a guy that good looking who just strikes up a conversation with random girl is only out to get laid. And of course guys like that know they're good looking, and they know they're charming, and they know they've got it in the bag. So I was a little wary...
But he was completely ignoring all his friends to talk to me! And then when his friends went to leave, he hesitated like he wasn't sure if he should go with them, or stay. And he stayed! BY HIMSELF just to hang out with me!
After a while though, he said he had to leave to go meet up with his friends, and he said, "Tell ya what. I'm gonna ask you for your number."
And I gave it to him. :) Didn't even have to offer.
So he left, and Abbie and I gossiped about how hot he is, till I realized he left his scarf behind!
So I pulled out my phone to text him, and saw that I already had a message from him that said, "I'm coming back, I left my scarf!"
Warren said it was cuz he wanted an excuse to come back and talk to me some more. Which is exactly what he did. He stayed and we talked till close. Finally I told him I needed to start doing some work. Lol. So he told me to call him if I wanted to go out afterwards. I don't normally go out after work cuz I'm just tired and sick of being around drunk people, but I debated...
Warren and Abbie told me I should definitely "go get laid" since it has now been over a year, yes a YEAR, since I've had sex. Ugh... And I did consider it but...I just didn't wanna throw away the possibility that maybe, just maybe me and this guy really actually did hit it off. Maybe it wasn't him just trying to get laid...
As I was pondering all these things, I got a text from Hottie #1! I was so shocked, definitely not expecting to hear from him. He said he was only in town for the weekend, but he wanted to know what I was doing tomorrow (NYE) which of course, I told him I'm working. Then he asked what I was doing before or after work, because he had no plans before, and he was heading to some after party later. But by this time, I was already losing interest in Hottie #1, due to the attentions of Hottie #2. Lol. So I texted Hottie #2 and asked him if he was out. He said yes, and we decided to meet at this really shitty bar down the street since a couple of my coworkers were going there. I texted Hottie #1 that I had no idea what my before and after work plans were, but that I'm off Sunday if he was still going to be in town.
I headed out to meet Hottie #2 and then all thoughts of Hottie #1 escaped me. When I saw him at the bar, he was just as hot as I remembered. He smiles a lot too, and you don't really realize how much guys don't smile until you meet a guy that smiles a lot. It's a total turn on.
So he bought me a drink, and we sat down at a table and talked, for about 30 minutes, until the bouncers started walking around kicking everyone out.
Then we wondered outside, still deep in conversation, and ended up getting in a cab.
"Wait, where are we going?" I asked as I closed my door.
He gives the cab driver his address. I almost protested, but then I thought, What the hell? I'm on my period and haven't shaved my legs so I'm definitely not going to have sex with him. Lol. So since I knew I was safe, we headed back to his place. He has a rather large apartment in a decent part of down with hardwood floors. Very creeky hardwood floors. Lol. It's an old building I guess. Him and his roommate had just finished painting the hallway and living room and everything was covered in dropcloths, so we headed in the direction of the kitchen...and his bedroom. And we were talking about who knows what, some nonsense, and then he said, "Ok I'm going to kiss you." And he did.
:)
Then he kept telling me how attracted to me he is, which always makes me feel...uncomfortable. I'm just not good at taking compliments on my looks. I mean it's not like I can really take credit for it, and I don't like to appear vain, so I just never know what to say! So I said, "Thanks, I guess." and he laughed and kept kissing me.
The first thing I noticed about his place is that he has 3 guitars. And he plays VERY well. I made him get one out and play me something. HOTT.
Second thing I noticed is he's a total nerd. He likes math, and the more comfortable he got around me, the dorkier her got! Lol.
Eventually we ended up in his room. So I said, "Look, I cannot stay here tonight."
"I know, I know, I just wanna make out with you." he said. Then his roommate went into the kitchen so he shut off his light cuz for some reason, he didn't want his roommate to know he was awake. And then of course we ended up in his bed. But I did not sleep with him!! Lol. We made out, and he did get my shirt off, but that's it. And he just kept complimenting me! Lol. And we talked a lot, about, oh I dunno, random things. He did try to get me to stay. He said that as much as he wanted to, he knew we weren't going to have sex, but that he's a good cuddler. Lol. But I couldn't stay anyway cuz of Jasper! I would never just leave him like that.
And then he kept saying, "Just 10 more minutes!" But finally I had to put my foot down. It was 5am by the time I left. He walked me all the way to the train.
"So...am I gonna hear from you again? I mean it's ok if you say no, I just...would rather know is all. I don't like to play games."
"Yes you're gonna hear from me again, are you kidding me?!" He said, "And I don't play games either."
"ALL guys play games." I said.
"Well so do girls." He said.
"Well I don't. I'd rather just be honest."
So I'm really hoping that he was being honest, and that I will hear from him again, because I think I really like him....so far anyway.
He doesn't have ANY plans for NYE either! Who just doesn't make NYE plans?! Lol. Maybe I'll invite him over after work tomorrow night...
Oh yea, his name is Matt.
Just earlier today I was telling one of the new waitresses at my bar how I'm beginning to feel like Chicago might be a wasteland as far as guys are concerned.
And then I met not one, but two hot guys in one night!!
The first hottie was sitting with about 5 other dudes at one of my tables. They were all friends with one of the doorguys. He wasn't super tall, but he was still taller than me, dark brown hair, and dimples. Really nice, and cute. And at the end of the night, they wanted to play credit card roulette. For those of you who aren't familiar with this game, everyone at the table puts their credit card in a hat, and then someone, usually the waiter or bartender, blindly draws credit cards out of the hat until there's only one left. Whichever card is the last one in the hat, that person has to pay for the whole bill. So I was drawing out the cards, and the cute guy ended up being the one who had to pay. I felt so bad! Lol. So when I closed him out, I wrote him a little note that said,
"Sorry for picking your card!
I owe you one.
[insert my phone number here]
-Peyton."
[insert my phone number here]
-Peyton."
And I also bought him a shot. I figured what the hell, I mean it's been FOREVER since I've been with any guy, what have I got to lose!?
[Quick side note! DID NOT hook up with Gavin when I was at home. OVER IT. But that's another story...]
So anyway, after they all left, I went over to the doorguy who was friends with all of them to get the deets. And he told me that Hottie #1 lives in D.C.!!! ((Sigh)) Disappointing, but oh well.
So the second hot guy came along about an hour and a half later. I had just walked over to the waitress well for a breather, and he was there in the corner with 3 friends, all guys. I didn't really pay him much attention, because I usually ignore anyone standing close to the waitress well, in order to discourage them from invading my space. It SUCKS when people crowd the waitress well and it makes it practically impossible for me to do my job. So I get a little territorial. But anyway, he turns to me and says, "Can you tell me if you guys have any triple hops brewed beer?"
And my initial thought was that he was looking for a real hoppy beer, like an IPA or something, so I started listing off our PAs and such.
Then he laughed and went on to explain that he was joking, and that Miller Lite is actually advertised as being triple hops brewed. So that just kind of opened up a conversation window, and he continued to talk to me and I continued to stand there and be entertained. I also began to notice how incredibly good looking he was.
I would say he looks like a cross between this guy:
and this guy:
SUPER HOT RIGHT?!?
But that immediately put me on my guard, because generally a guy that good looking who just strikes up a conversation with random girl is only out to get laid. And of course guys like that know they're good looking, and they know they're charming, and they know they've got it in the bag. So I was a little wary...
But he was completely ignoring all his friends to talk to me! And then when his friends went to leave, he hesitated like he wasn't sure if he should go with them, or stay. And he stayed! BY HIMSELF just to hang out with me!
After a while though, he said he had to leave to go meet up with his friends, and he said, "Tell ya what. I'm gonna ask you for your number."
And I gave it to him. :) Didn't even have to offer.
So he left, and Abbie and I gossiped about how hot he is, till I realized he left his scarf behind!
So I pulled out my phone to text him, and saw that I already had a message from him that said, "I'm coming back, I left my scarf!"
Warren said it was cuz he wanted an excuse to come back and talk to me some more. Which is exactly what he did. He stayed and we talked till close. Finally I told him I needed to start doing some work. Lol. So he told me to call him if I wanted to go out afterwards. I don't normally go out after work cuz I'm just tired and sick of being around drunk people, but I debated...
Warren and Abbie told me I should definitely "go get laid" since it has now been over a year, yes a YEAR, since I've had sex. Ugh... And I did consider it but...I just didn't wanna throw away the possibility that maybe, just maybe me and this guy really actually did hit it off. Maybe it wasn't him just trying to get laid...
As I was pondering all these things, I got a text from Hottie #1! I was so shocked, definitely not expecting to hear from him. He said he was only in town for the weekend, but he wanted to know what I was doing tomorrow (NYE) which of course, I told him I'm working. Then he asked what I was doing before or after work, because he had no plans before, and he was heading to some after party later. But by this time, I was already losing interest in Hottie #1, due to the attentions of Hottie #2. Lol. So I texted Hottie #2 and asked him if he was out. He said yes, and we decided to meet at this really shitty bar down the street since a couple of my coworkers were going there. I texted Hottie #1 that I had no idea what my before and after work plans were, but that I'm off Sunday if he was still going to be in town.
I headed out to meet Hottie #2 and then all thoughts of Hottie #1 escaped me. When I saw him at the bar, he was just as hot as I remembered. He smiles a lot too, and you don't really realize how much guys don't smile until you meet a guy that smiles a lot. It's a total turn on.
So he bought me a drink, and we sat down at a table and talked, for about 30 minutes, until the bouncers started walking around kicking everyone out.
Then we wondered outside, still deep in conversation, and ended up getting in a cab.
"Wait, where are we going?" I asked as I closed my door.
He gives the cab driver his address. I almost protested, but then I thought, What the hell? I'm on my period and haven't shaved my legs so I'm definitely not going to have sex with him. Lol. So since I knew I was safe, we headed back to his place. He has a rather large apartment in a decent part of down with hardwood floors. Very creeky hardwood floors. Lol. It's an old building I guess. Him and his roommate had just finished painting the hallway and living room and everything was covered in dropcloths, so we headed in the direction of the kitchen...and his bedroom. And we were talking about who knows what, some nonsense, and then he said, "Ok I'm going to kiss you." And he did.
:)
Then he kept telling me how attracted to me he is, which always makes me feel...uncomfortable. I'm just not good at taking compliments on my looks. I mean it's not like I can really take credit for it, and I don't like to appear vain, so I just never know what to say! So I said, "Thanks, I guess." and he laughed and kept kissing me.
The first thing I noticed about his place is that he has 3 guitars. And he plays VERY well. I made him get one out and play me something. HOTT.
Second thing I noticed is he's a total nerd. He likes math, and the more comfortable he got around me, the dorkier her got! Lol.
Eventually we ended up in his room. So I said, "Look, I cannot stay here tonight."
"I know, I know, I just wanna make out with you." he said. Then his roommate went into the kitchen so he shut off his light cuz for some reason, he didn't want his roommate to know he was awake. And then of course we ended up in his bed. But I did not sleep with him!! Lol. We made out, and he did get my shirt off, but that's it. And he just kept complimenting me! Lol. And we talked a lot, about, oh I dunno, random things. He did try to get me to stay. He said that as much as he wanted to, he knew we weren't going to have sex, but that he's a good cuddler. Lol. But I couldn't stay anyway cuz of Jasper! I would never just leave him like that.
And then he kept saying, "Just 10 more minutes!" But finally I had to put my foot down. It was 5am by the time I left. He walked me all the way to the train.
"So...am I gonna hear from you again? I mean it's ok if you say no, I just...would rather know is all. I don't like to play games."
"Yes you're gonna hear from me again, are you kidding me?!" He said, "And I don't play games either."
"ALL guys play games." I said.
"Well so do girls." He said.
"Well I don't. I'd rather just be honest."
So I'm really hoping that he was being honest, and that I will hear from him again, because I think I really like him....so far anyway.
He doesn't have ANY plans for NYE either! Who just doesn't make NYE plans?! Lol. Maybe I'll invite him over after work tomorrow night...
Oh yea, his name is Matt.
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