Wednesday, October 28, 2009

The Last Supper

Well...the date didn't exactly go as planned. He showed up late, I could tell he didn't really want to be here, and he was drunk! Not hammered or anything, but buzzed, and obviously under the influence.
And he doesn't want a relationship right now.
It's over.
I don't know why he keeps dragging me through the mud like this. Why would he want to spend time with me, without sex, if he didn't care?? But he flat out told me that he just doesn't care enough to want to be in a relationship with me.
So I don't know what I'm going to do now. ((Sigh))
I've already spent the whole night, crying and kicking myself for letting him do this to me again. I feel like I'm back to where I was 2 months ago. I've accomplished nothing, other than reopening my heart to him, so he could break it all over again. And now I just...don't want to think about it anymore.

My interview yesterday went really well. So well, in fact, that I got a call this morning from my contact (the guy who got me the interview), and he told me they want to offer me the job! They just want to make sure I want the job. And I've been thinking about it, and I think I'm going to take it. I have nothing to lose at this point, and I can only move upwards from here, so why not? When I spoke to him, he asked me what I thought, and I said I was surprised! I mean, I went into it knowing I was the least qualified, and I honestly didn't expect them to offer me the job. So I said I needed a couple days to think about it, and he said no problem, to call him back this weekend.
I called my mom and talked to her, and a couple of my friends, and I think this job will be a good opportunity for me. So...hopefully it's still available. I definitely need to make that call soon.


Nic said...

Congrats on the job. At least your career is going somewhere.

Can't believe what a bleep he is. How can he do this to you AGAIN. Argh!! I just want to kick his ass.

Anonymous said...

Ya.. he's a super douchebag. And a huge liar, well at least now you won't do it again. Sometimes it takes a few times to really get it. I've done it too.
But congrats on the job, perfect timing for some good news for you!

Ginny said...

I hate to point this out... but the old quote "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.." applies and I'm sorry Peyton, but did you really expect better? Just move on and dont look back, you deserve a guy who wont treat you like garbage. Congrats on the job! You should take it, it will distract you and help you move on.

Anonymous said...

What I can't believe is that youre blaming HIM! It's your fault you LET him do this again! After many many MANY people telling you what a jerk he was and to walk away a loonnngg time ago, you didn't listen. So you have no one but yourself to blame. Hopefully you won't be stupid again. So stop crying and complaining about it and move on finally!

And YES take that job! Get out of the bar scene.. it's going nowhere fast. Get away from Brandon and don't look back!

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry that he did this to you again.. Just keep your head held high and move on! enjoy being single and enjoying life! Because one of the days, you will be married/kids! Your carefree days will be long gone! LOL

Autumn said...

You definitely should take the job! Especially in this economy and especially because bartending is a dead end! Plus it will help you with a new start and meeting new people.

I'm really sorry about Brandon but I think everyone saw it coming. I think that maybe you two just aren't compatible. You seem like you need someone who is going to be there for you all the time, and really be sweet and affectionate and open, and adoring of you. (Which isn't a bad thing) Branden seems to need someone who is going to be more independent and less emotional and not need his support as much (which is also not a bad thing) I honestly thing you two just are incompatible when it comes down to it. He wants to be two individuals in a relationship and you want to be a team.

Good luck with moving on!

Jadeny said...

Take the job! It is just what you need to get you out of this circle of friends/environments/habits that keep Brandon in you life, head and heart.

Start new and see how great you will feel!

Good luck.

HEATHER said...

I will def have to agree with what everyone has said. Taking the job seems like the perfect chance to have a fresh start. Hopefully it can keep you away from Brandon b.c you know he'll just keep doing this to you until you stop him. Don't worry, I'm sure your future is bright. :o)