Misadventures in Tinder Dating

I've been on the fence about whether to blog about this or not, because part of me thinks it's been done before, and the other part of me is lazy. Lol. But what the hey.
So in light of my current situation, I thought it couldn't hurt to give Tinder another shot. I mean I'm not really meeting anyone, and I'm not getting any younger. So I thought I'd give it a try. I made sure to mention in my profile that I wanna go on dates, not chat online with strangers. So I made a few matches, and finally a guy asked me out.
His photos were a little iffy...like he could be really attractive, or not attractive at all, ya know? But I took a chance and swiped right, and he asked me out. He wanted to do dinner, but I suggested drinks, because it's more casual. So he picked the place and I went to meet him. Don't worry, I took a screen shot of his pic, and sent it to Bethany telling her where I was headed. In case I turned up dead the next day. Lol.
I got there first, and he was running a bit late, so I ordered a beer and grabbed a stool at the bar. About 10 minutes later, he arrived. I could tell immediately that he wasn't my type. A little too...rough around the edges for me, and not in a good way. I mean, he was really nice, just...I hate to say it, but I was definitely out of his league. Lol. But I figured I'm already here, I might as well just enjoy myself, and treat this like 2 friends hanging out instead of a romantic date. So I did. He was a bit awkward, and not much of a conversationalist, so I did most of the talking and asked him questions to keep the conversation going. He told me he was an electrician, and he recently moved here from Detroit.
Shortly into our "Get to know yous" he says, "You seem really cool and chill and I wanna be honest with you about something."
ALERT!! ALERT!! That's what my brain was saying anyway. I said, "Ok..."
"Um....Well I sorta been to prison before."
"Ok...." ALERT!! ALERT!! "Can I ask why?"
"Yea, it was just drugs. And assault. I mean this guy bought some shit from me and then he didn't wanna pay me so I kicked his ass. And then he ratted on me to the cops so he wouldn't have to pay me, and I went to prison."

Well that went south quickly.

So, felony drug and assault charges. Lovely.
The rest of the date is irrelevant. After being informed that I was indeed on a date with an ex-con, I figured, How much worse can it get? So I let him buy me a couple drinks and when I thought it wouldn't be impolite to take my leave, I let him walk to me to my car (despite my protestations). He was quite tipsy by this point and kept asking when he was going to see me again, and he even tried to kiss me! UGH. I turned away and quickly closed the door to my car. He walked back to the bar. Alone.
He texted me the next morning, and I figured it wouldn't be very nice to prolong his misery, so I just said, "Look, you seem like a nice guy, but chemistry is really important to me, and I just wasn't feelin' it. But good luck!"
I also wasn't feeling his smoker's teeth, or his prison tats, but that's neither here nor there. He took the well though I think. At least, he didn't act crazy. He just said he appreciated my honesty.

Now after a date with an ex-con, do you think I continued to use Tinder?? Unfortunately, the answer is yes. I'll tell you all about my next date in my next post.

I Haven't Done This In A While!

Last night was AWESOME SAUCE! First of all, I haven't been out on a Friday night in a looooong time. And I was determined to enjoy it! Lane, Bruce and I had plans to go to a show at the theater. We get into most of the shows for free with our student IDs, so we all take advantage of it.
So I put on my black Rock & Republic skinny jeans, black wedge pumps, and a light blue tunic, and headed out, (with flip flops in my purse, just in case lol). Here's a picture of my outfit, just so you get the idea...


Needless to say, I was taller than all the boys, but no one seemed to mind. And it felt so good to strut my stuff after so long. Lol. So I met Lane at the theater, and we were supposed to meet Bruce there too, but he missed his train, and promised to meet us afterwards. So Lane and I got seats near the back, cuz it was pretty crowded. As I was walking, I totally caught him looking me up and down. It was the first time he'd really seen me decked out, and to be honest, I didn't think I was really decked out. Just...dressed up a little. ;)
The way we were sitting, we had to turn to the right to face the stage, so he ended up a little bit behind me. And the whole time I was super self conscious, wondering if he was looking at me or not. And I couldn't steal any glances at him without being totally obvious, so it was actually rather awkward for me. I mean, we were watching a show, so we couldn't talk. And to be honest, it wasn't that great as far as shows there go. Not the best one I've seen anyway. So when it ended, I was really relieved to get out of there!
We decided to head back to The Ginger Man, and Bruce and Will met us there. Bruce brought a friend of his along too, a really tall guy, with gorgeous blue eyes, named Max. I'm not gonna lie, it felt great being the only girl. And not because I worry about competition, it was just nice to be surrounded by so many guys! Haha.
So the drinking commenced, and when Ginger Man closed, we headed to Crows. We ordered another round, and pretty soon I needed to take a trip to the ladies. While I was waiting in line, sitting on a stool, a strange short guy in a french cap came up and started talking to (read: annoying) me. I humored him, since I was in good spirits, and I learned that he was from Canada, visiting. Being that it was 2 days before the 4th, I teased him a bit. Then he shamelessly hit on me. I asked him if he wanted to take a shot with me, which he interpreted as me asking him to buy me a drink, so when I came back from the bathroom, he'd already latched himself onto some other poor girl. Darn!
When I got back to the guys, they started teasing me about getting hit on while waiting for the bathroom, and I told them the story. This somehow evolved into them daring me to call him out and cause a scene. And being drunk, and never one to turn down a dare, I approached him. He was sitting at the bar next to a girl, who clearly looked disinterested.

"Uh...excuse me?" I said, "I'm gone for 5 minutes and I come back to find you already with some other girl? I thought you were into me!"

He stammered and looked shocked. The girl looked confused.

"Fine. I see how it is. I see what kind of guy you are. Well have fun with her!" I said and stormed off. I burst into a fit of giggles as soon as my back was turned. The guys high fived me, surreptitiously of course. A couple minutes later, the girl he'd been talking to walked up to me.

"Hey, were you serious back there or...?"

I laughed, "NO! Ohmygod, that guy is a total skeaze! I was just fucking with him cuz I thought it'd be funny." I explained.

"Ohhh!" She laughed and looked relieved.

"Ohmygod! He's coming!" I whispered as I saw him approaching, "Play along!"

The girl winked.

"You are such a fucking slut! You just swoop in as soon as I leave!" I started yelling.

"Bitch! I did NOT steal your man!"

At that moment, I stood up off my stool, and was towering over her in my heels.

"Bitch! I will STEP ON YOU!" It was all I could do not to bust out laughing. The Canadian guy looked like he was in a state of shock with ill contained flattery.

"Whatever, skank! I'm Mexican! I'll kick your ass!" The girl yelled back.

Right then, her friend, who had no clue we were just acting, came up and pushed us apart. We were nose to nose by this point. So Will jumped in and acted like he was holding me back, while the girl dragged her friend off to explain. The Canadian guy immediately ran off to tell his friends what just happened.
When I turned around, the guys were doubled over and we were all reduced to tears of laughter.
For the rest of the night, I had to avoid the Canadian guy's glance or I'd start laughing again. At 4am, they finally kicked us out of the bar. While we were standing outside, trying to hail a cab, the Canadian guy came up to me and asked me to go somewhere with him!
"Look dude, everything we said back there was an act. A joke! And I'm not going anywhere with you."
Just then, the girl walked by and gave me a high 5.
It.Was.Awesome!

So anyways, we hopped in a cab, and I invited everyone back to my place! Lol. Dane was at the firehouse, so I knew he wouldn't be home, and Joey has practically moved out already. So everyone came over. My room is actually clean right now, miraculously! So Max sat down at my piano and started playing, Will and Lane made themselves comfy on my bed, Bruce sat in my chair, and Jasper was going nuts! Lol. I got each of them a beer from the fridge and I have no idea what we did for the next hour. But around 8, I suggested we all go to IHOP. We were all starving, and drunk, and it was 8am, so why not??? So we walked the few blocks down to IHOP and grubbed. It was awesome. Bruce and Max got a cab, and then Will took the train, and once again...it was me and Lane. I gave him directions to the red line and we hugged goodbye and then went our separate ways. But as soon as I got home, I texted him, "Wait! Come back!" in a half-serious, half-joking way.

"Really? Is that an option? I'm not that far..." He wrote back.

"Sure, why not?" I said.

About and HOUR later, he made it here. Lol. He knocked on my bedroom door (the one that leads to the courtyard! Apparently he got lost, and couldn't remember which house it was, and his phone died. I was starting to think he just wasn't coming. But there he was, on my doorstep! Apparently he jumped the courtyard fence, since he couldn't called me. :)
I was already in my PJs, which consisted of a sports bra, t-shirt and boxers. So I got back under the covers, and he laid down next to me on top of the covers. We laid there, just talking for a while. Then my eyelids started to get heavy, so I turned off the lamp.

"Sorry," I said. "I had to turn that off, I'm starting to get really tired." It was probably 9:30am by this point.
Then he leaned over and kissed me. It was like 3 long pecks, or 3 short regular kisses. I dunno what you'd call it, but it surprised me. I didn't kiss back really the first time, cuz I was so caught off guard, but I did the second and third time. And I'm sure I was blushing! Then he laid back down.

"Well I just had to get that out of the way." He said, "Now it's gonna be weird in class."

"Why would you say that?" I asked.

"I dunno, maybe not."

"Well if it's weird, it's not gonna be because of me." I said.

Then we laid in the dark and talked some more. And he took his pants off because it was so fucking hot in my room. Lol. I eventually had to go turn the air down cuz we were both sweating. When I came back, I decided to kiss him again. Because he seemed so uncertain about the last one, I figured I should reciprocate a little more. So I did. He was under the covers this time, right next to me, and I could feel him pressed up against me. I could also feel something else, pressing up against me. Lol. He actually apologized and adjusted himself. Hahaha, what a gentleman!
Then he said, "I hope it doesn't bother you, but I like to cuddle."
And then he snuggled up to me and we went to sleep.

Consider This My Notice

So when the schedule came out yesterday, (surprise surprise!) I wasn't on it. And nobody ever said anything to me, all weekend! I went to work, plastered a smile on my face, and did my job, just like I always do. So I sent an email to Brandon, asking him what was up. He wrote back with some bullshit excuse that said I wasn't paying attention in the (impromptu, unplanned, drunken, after work) meeting Saturday night when Brian was talking. Brian is one of the owners/managers, but he pretty much only comes in to drink with his buddies. Oh, and he is a total douche. BUT, being the professional that I am, I immediately fired off an apology letter to him, just to cover my bases.
I'll paste.

Hi Brian,
It was brought to my attention that during our after-hours meeting last Saturday I came off as being disrespectful and inattentive. I just wanted to send you a quick email and apologize for this. It was not my intention at all to disrespect you, or anyone else. I can assure you that I was definitely listening even if it appeared that I wasn't. I really am sorry, as I am not in the habit of disrespecting my managers, and I want to take responsibility for my actions and make it right. Once again, I apologize, and I promise it will not happen again.
Sincerely,

Peyton

I didn't get a response from him till tonight. But I was in complete shock when I read what he wrote...

Thanks for the email but through the grapevine I hear you are looking for another job and you're strongly opinionated about how bad this operation is and what we require our bar staff to do. I was just assuming you could use a week to help your job seeking efforts along. On a side note, as the man that oversees the operation I'm pretty proud of what we've accomplished as a company and if you think otherwise I'm sorry for the bad experience you've had with us and I wish you well in your next position. Also, the phrase " they're cheap" is a very inappropriate term applied to a company that spends $5k a week on marketing not including management. Furthermore, email collection is merely a task that allows us to show our staff that a team effort goes a lot farther then dividing the staff into a separate work entity with no stake in the flow of business. After 15 years in the business, a marketing degree, and owning my first bar at 27, I think I'm qualified enough to make that assessment! Again I'm sorry for your poor experience and opinion of us not to mention a horribly run bar that you had to deal with, I wish you better luck with a position under a management and owner that you respect a tad bit more. I'm available anytime if you should feel the need to talk to me in person... Thanks

BAHAHAA! Seriously?!?? His "operation" is the laughing stock of the neighborhood. No fucking joke. And I bet his dick got hard while he was sitting there rattling off all his "accomplishments". The arrogant, smarmy fuck. Well, this was my response.

Well I have to admit that I'm disappointed that what you heard "through the grapevine" is influencing your opinions more than my performance at work, which has not reflected at all any opinions I may or may not have. Since you would rather take stock in gossip than what I actually have to say, I honestly don't believe having a sit down with you would do any good. I apologize if I have offended you in any way, but I do have to look out for myself, and if I am not making enough money to pay my bills, then I need to find another source of income. As a businessman, with a marketing degree, I think you would understand that. I have done everything you guys have asked of me and never complained. When I choose to vent to someone privately, I don't expect to be punished for what I say. Unless I am spreading things around or have a poor attitude at work, which I don't, I don't understand why I am having to defend myself against heresay.

And then he writes...

It's hardly hearsay when you read it first hand from the person that wrote it. Which would certainly be construed as an infectious bad energy especially when you question someones logic for why they are still with me! Before you try and defend yourself I'd be more careful where your written words end up and how they may be mistakenly left for view on an open office computer. Your right a meeting isn't needed, Again good luck with your search.

I didn't even bother responding to that one. He should have had his high school English teacher take a look at it before even sending it to me. But the important thing is, he undoubtedly implicated Nicole, which leaves me free to confront her, FINALLY!

A Crappy Situation

Alyssa and I finally talked about the whole situation about Daniel and I. It just seems like since Daniel and I have been dating, it's been harder for me to talk to Alyssa about...stuff, because I don't wanna weird her out! I mean, like I mentioned in my last post, most of the things I would normally tell her, I didn't wanna bring up, because it was her brother!
I asked her if she thought I was being stupid, dating him I mean. And she said, "Well, no... I mean, just be careful. It's just that most of the other girls he's dated were really stupid, or immature, or psycho... And I didn't like any of them. But you're smart, and cool, so maybe things will be different with you."
Then she asked, "Omg! Are you sleeping with him??"
"WHAT?! No!" I said.
"You're lying!"
"No! I'm not! I mean, even if I was, would you want me to tell you??"
She paused before responding.
"Yea... Well, no! Well, actually, yea. I would want you to tell me. Just don't give me any details!"
We both laughed, and I agreed to keep her updated on the status of our relationship.

Now I have a funny story for you guys. It may be a little TMI but...what the hell. It's freakin' funny! I went over to Daniel's last night after work. It was about 4 am, so he was already asleep but he had left the door open for me. I crawled into bed with him, and we talked for a little bit before drifting off. The next morning, he got up, got ready for work, and I kissed him goodbye and fell back asleep. I had to work at 5 today, so I had my work clothes with me and was planning on having lunch with Daniel and then getting ready.
He came home for lunch around 1, we went out for sandwiches, and then he went back to work. So I showered and starting getting ready for work. Well it was about that time that I suddenly had to go to the bathroom...pretty bad. And let's just say I didn't have to pee. Lol. For some reason, my bowels almost completely shut off when I'm away from home because I don't like to go number 2 in public places. I think it's a subconscious thing. So then usually, as soon as I get home, I have to go! Lol. So it was kind of like that. As soon as he went back to work, I had to go. So I did. Haha.
Well, his apartment is pretty old, and the plumbing isn't exactly up to par. I mean the water pressure sucks, for one, and the toilet is ancient. So somehow, I clogged the toilet. And it wasn't as if I took a huge dump or something! I swear! So I tried flushing like 3 times, to no avail. It just kept filling up and then slowly draining back down. So I started looking frantically for a plunger, but he didn't have one anywhere! How does a guy, who lives alone, not have a toilet plunger!? I mean I practically tore apart both his bathrooms.
So I tried using the toilet bowl cleaning brush. That was a bust. Nothing was working! So I decided to go buy a toilet plunger. The nearest store was Whole Foods, and they didn't have any cleaning supplies. A little further down the road, a Bed Bath & Beyond! Perfect! I scoured the store till I found the bathroom supplies and the only plunger I found was 50 bucks!! WTF?!?
"I don't need a stainless steel container with my toilet plunger!" I thought.
And I definitely didn't wanna waste 50 bucks on that! So I left in search of a grocery store. Finally, a Kroger. It took me about 15 minutes to find what I was looking for; then I walked up to the cashier, holding nothing but a toilet plunger. She gave me a questionable, but sympathetic look, which was enough to make me blush furiously. ((Sigh)) SO embarrassing. I got the hell out of there as fast as I could.
When I got back to his apartment, the toilet was full almost to the brim with water!! So I had to very carefully unclog it. But alas! It worked! No mess. And he'll never know! Hahahaha. I was so relieved.
Can you imagine how embarrassing that would've been if Daniel would have come home to a clogged, poopy toilet, with no one to blame but me!? Lol. Ahhhh! The horror!
I told Alyssa about it while we were talking today, and she thought it was hilarious. At the time, I was completely panicked, but in retrospect, it's pretty hilarious.

((Sigh)) Anyway...I'm going to Austin tomorrow cuz it's Jenna's birthday this weekend. I'm staying with Shane though, cuz some of Jenna's other friends are going, and they're all getting a hotel. But I don't have money to blow on hotels, and it's been a while since Shane and Izzie and I have hung out. So I'm killing 2 birds with 1 stone, and it'll be a blast! It seems like forever since I've spent the weekend in Austin. I am gonna miss Daniel though... He's got his daughter this weekend so I'm sure he'll be preoccupied. Well, that's all for now! I'll try to write as soon as I get back!

P.S. Brian is STILL calling me!! Today, he told me that he was gonna keep pursuing me until either Daniel and I are officially a couple, or until he "get's what he wants". WTF?!?


Demetri Of The Day:
“I noticed that there are no B batteries. I think that’s to avoid confusion, cause if there were you wouldn’t know if someone was stuttering. ‘Yes, hello I’d like some b-batteries.’ ‘What kind?’ ‘B-batteries.’ ‘What kind?!?’ ‘B-batteries!!!’ and D-batteries that’s hard for foreigners. ‘Yes, I would like de batteries.’”

Now What??

Wow, can you believe it's April already??? Time to turn another page on my Harry Potter calendar.
((sigh))

So you guys are seriously not going to believe what happened at work last night.
These 3 girls came in around 11 or so. And by this time, it was just me working by myself, cuz Monday nights are always slow. And these girls were hammered, not to mention trashy....ugh. They were wearing muffin top jeans and extremely low cut shirts.
Well, these 2 guys walk up and start talking to them, and apparently one of the 2 guys was one of the 3 girls' boyfriend. Well, this boyfriend dude, already had a tab open with me, and he had asked to close it. Well his card was declined, so I asked him to come over to the side of the bar, because I didn't want to embarrass him in front of everyone.
So I was like, "Hey, John, could you come here for a sec?" and I gestured over by the DJ booth.
Well John's girlfriend (apparently) gave me a realllly dirty look, and started talking shit about me immediately to her friends. I just kind of looked at her like, "What's your problem?" but I didn't say anything.
So John walks over to the DJ booth, and I'm like, "Hey, sorry to drag you away, but your card was declined. Do you have another card? Or do you just wanna pay cash or something?"
And he is pretty drunk too, so he says, "Oh come on Peyton! You know I'm gonna take care of you!" And proceeds to put his arm around me. I just kind of gave him an awkward smile.
"Ok well, I can try your card again if you want..."
"Sure baby, here try this one." He says, and hands me his Amex.
Right about then, the drunk trashy girlfriend just pops out of nowhere and shoves me!
"Bitch! Get the fuck off my boyfriend! You think I don't see you lookin' at me like you're better than me??" She yells.
I was pretty much too shocked to react at that moment, but I managed to give her a really confused "whatthehellareyoutalkingabout" look.
"What?! You're not gonna say anything?! Don't you fuckin' stare at me like that bitch!" And she shoves me again.
At this point, I was starting to get pissed. Slow nights are always a pain in the ass to work by yourself, because it's usually boring, there's no one to talk to, and the people that are drunk on a Sunday or Monday night, are always these kinds of people! And I dunno where the managers were either...probably off doing inventory somewhere.
"Seriously. You better get the hell out of my face right now." I said to her in a barely audible voice.
And now, she's like "Oh! What are you gonna do?! You think you're the shit just cuz you're the bartender??"
And her boyfriend is trying to drag her away, but she's just pushing him off her. And I'm just standing there, fuming.
So she gets back in my face again, and I just don't know what came over me! I hit her!
I punched this bitch in the face, so hard, and she sort of fell backwards, like in slow motion, and John (the boyfriend) caught her, and just sort of stared at me with this shell-shocked look on his face. And I snatched his credit card off the bar, turned around, and ran his tab. Then I calmly walked back over to them, and handed him his bill.
I didn't say anything, and neither did he. The girl I hit was heading towards the bathroom with her friends.
And that was when Mr. P. came out of nowhere.

"Peyton. You have to go. Now." He said.
I was still like...too shocked to process anything that was going on. So I took my bar towel out of my back pocket, grabbed my purse, and just left. I didn't clock out, I didn't say anything to anybody, I just left.
And I'm pretty sure I'm fired. It might have something to do with that "No Hit" policy I signed when they hired me...

APRIL FOOLS!!!!

Hahahaha...none of that really happened, but I really had ya goin' didn't I!?!?


Demetri Of The Day:
Graffiti… I don’t like graffiti, unless it teaches me something, you know? Like “Oh, that’s how Alex feels about Maria. I wouldn’t have known if I had not walked by there, thank you.” Graffiti’s the most passionate literature there is, you know? It’s always like “Bush sucks!”, “U2 Rocks!”. I want to make indifferent graffiti. “Toy Story 2 was okay!” “I like Sheryl as a friend, but I’m not sure about taking things further”, “This is a bridge!”, “That guy’s right!”

Guy #1 and Guy #2

The funniest thing happened last night and I just have to write about it! Sophie, Brent and I were walking back to the car after a long night of dancing. Brent was on his bike, since he and Sophie ride bikes practically everywhere, but he was riding slowly alongside us so we could keep up. There were 2 guys walking a little ways behind us for part of the way, but we weren't paying them much attention. Brent and Sophie were deep in conversation about something and I was following close behind, when one of the guys was suddenly right next to me, walking in step with me. I looked over at him, and noticed right away that he was very short.
"Are you friends with this guy?" he asked in a low voice, almost a whisper.
"What??" I was totally confused.
"That guy. On the bike. Is he a friend of yours?"
"Why?" I thought this was a very strange question.
Guy #2 was now walking next to me on my right.
"Well, because if he's not, I'll hit him, and get you away from him." Guy #1 said, again in a low voice. By now, Sophie and Brent had noticed the 2 guys, but were still in conversation.
I turned to Guy #1, looked him in the eye, and said in a very serious tone, "If you hit him, I will punch you in the throat."
Guy #2 burst out laughing.
"Well then I guess he is a friend of yours." Guy #1 said.
"Yea...you could say that." I replied.
At this point Brent turned around, "Wait, what's going on??" he said.
I told him what happened and he laughed. Apparently the 2 strange guys thought we were being followed and wanted to "help" Sophie and I. Of course I thought that was absolutely ridiculous considering if Brent had been following us, Sophie and I wouldn't have been talking to him, and if Guy #1 had tried to jump anyone, I could have easily fended him off myself! But it was funny, and we all had quite a laugh.
Last night was pretty fun; we danced a lot, till I was practically sweating my ass off! But the Orlando night scene has nothing on Houston! Not nearly as many people go out here, and everytime I saw a hot guy, I had to ask myself if he was gay or straight. But overall, it was good time! So it's back to Houston today, and I've decided on Demetri Martin! So here's his first quote!

Demetri Of The Day:
"A dreamcatcher works, if your dream is to be gay."