Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Up In The Air

I haven't updated in a while because...well it's been pretty quiet around here. Nothing really to write about! But I think I've saved up enough little things over the past few days for an entry by now.
Ben and Summer broke up. Another stupid drunken fight... And Ben has been driving me crazy for the past week, texting me, asking me what to do, how he can get her back, he heard she went on a date with her ex and they're getting back together... Ugh.
I keep telling him to just STOP! Ignore her. Don't call her. Don't text her. Just leave her alone. She's not getting back with her ex, he's just a rebound, as usual. But he won't listen! AHHH! I know she still loves him. And I'm certain they will work it out eventually and get back together, but like I told Ben, she's never going to get over it if he keeps badgering her! She wants some space!
Anyways, so Ben said he wanted to hang out this week, and we decided on today. I convinced Taryn to come along with us, so that I wouldn't get stuck sitting there alone, listening to Ben sob about Summer. And then I invited Todd, cuz he's back for a week or so. We decided on a movie. But then Taryn backed out cuz someone offered her Mariah Carey (ew!) tickets! So now it's just me, Ben and Todd tonight. Ben and Todd have met, and are cool, but still...I'm afraid it's going to be awkward. But we'll find out I guess...

Things on the Todd front have been...inconclusive. I finally talked to him about the whole Laura situation. He said he knew she was expecting him to propose this Spring, and he wasn't planning on it, so he told her not to expect anything. And then she basically gave him an ultimatum, so he broke up with her. And they haven't talked since. Until yesterday...

I'm sitting at my desk at work, and my cell starts vibrating, and it's her! I did a double take. Why the hell would Laura be calling me??

"Hello?" I said in a hushed voice, crouching down in my cubicle.

"Hey Peyton..."

"Hey, what's up?"

"Did I wake you up??" She asked.

"Oh, no no. I'm just talking quietly cuz I'm at work, and I don't get a lot of privacy here."

"Oh, ok. Well...I just wanted to...to call and apologize..."

"Apologize?? For what??" I interrupted.

"For Sunday night, after the Superbowl, you know, if I was being...a downer." She trailed off.

"No, not at all! Don't worry about it. You were wasted. It happens. Hell, I was just as bad on Friday night, and did you forget that I almost puked at breakfast on Saturday??"

She laughed, but I could tell it was strained.

"I was so nervous to call you. I just...I didn't mean to get that drunk. I only had 2 drinks! I've never been like that before, and Todd said that you and Reese had to take me into the bathroom and talk to me, which I don't even remember, and I just feel really embarrassed..."

"You talked to Todd?" I asked, surprised.

"Yea, I sort of, accidentally ran into him earlier today... Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being so drunk and everything."

"It's no big deal. Seriously. Don't worry about it." I said.

She sighed. "Ok well...I guess I'll...talk to you later."

Awkward... I could tell she really didn't know what to say here, since we most likely would NOT be talking again later. But what else do you say?

"Sure, yea. I'll talk to you later." I said. And we hung up.

Well that was weird! I thought. She was the last person I expected to get a call from. I immediately started to wonder and worry if she and Todd had talked and decided to work things out. So I sent Todd a text:

So you ran into Laura today? How was that??

Todd: Yea, how'd you know?

Me: She called me!

Todd: Are you serious?? Why??

Me: To apologize about Sunday

Todd: Oh god, she's really calling everybody?? I'm sorry about that.

Me: No, it's no big deal. I mean, that's what I told her. She just feels embarrassed I guess.

Todd: Hey is it ok if I call you in a bit, cuz I'm driving.

Me: Sure. I get off in 15.

So we talked after I got off work, and Todd explained that Laura didn't know he was back in town, and went over to his parents house to drop off some stuff, and there he was. So they talked for a minute, and he mentioned something to her about Sunday night, and how crazy she was acting. And then she said she would call everyone and apologize, but he told her not to, cuz that would be even more weird. Then apparently she tried to kiss him, but he turned away and told her he was sick. Which is true, but he also told me that he's sticking to his guns, and not giving into her this time. It's really over. So that was kind of a relief. We talked a little bit longer and that's when I invited him to the movies with me, Taryn and Ben.
But now Ben's saying he just wants to do dinner so we can chat. Hopefully Todd is cool with that. Maybe just Todd and I can go to a movie afterwards...?

I'm still not sure what I'm going to do about my feelings. I wanna take it slow because I don't wanna overwhelm him, or spring anything on him. He needs time to be single. He's told me. Apparently a bunch of girls have been asking him out lately, since they learned of his newfound bachelorhood. ((Sigh)) I don't wanna miss my chance, but I have to be very careful going about this. I do want to tell him how I feel, but I don't wanna just be like, "I like you and I'm willing to wait around for as much time as you need to go off and fuck other girls, or whatever!" Because that makes me seem too available, and borderline desperate. I'm leaning more towards the "Let's test the waters, and just see where it goes, no pressure, no relationship-talk" approach. It's just a matter of figuring out how to tell him that.

And I don't even know if I'll have the opportunity to get into any of this tonight, or any time soon. But he said he wants to hang out more when he starts feeling better. He had a 104 degree fever on Monday! But anyways, I'm open to more suggestions on how to broach the subject!

In other news, Cecilia and I finally have plans to hang out! We're gonna go see Dierks Bentley at the rodeo. I'm not a big country listener, but I like it every now and then, and Dierks is superhot, and Cecilia is a big fan. Plus, we haven't hung out in a really long time, so I'm excited! Nick and I are going to the Cook Off together as well. I invited Todd to that too, cuz he's never been!! But he's not sure if he'll still be in Houston by then. So it's all still up in the air.

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