Turn of Events

After picking up TB from the airport, I didn't really see much of him until last night. I was working, and trying to rest up for Friday night.

So last night I met up with Bethany, Tugg, Ben and Summer for sushi. TB and JC showed up a bit later. I had a couple glasses of wine, and some saki at dinner, so I was feelin' pretty good by the time we got to the shot bar. Once there, I ran into none other, than Law School! He was meeting up with some friends of his. So it ended up being me, and 4 boys! Haha. Bethany and April had to go to work.

So we all took some shots, and then grabbed a cab and headed out to the country bar, to visit Bethany and Summer. Law School stayed at the shot bar, but said he might meet up with us later.

As soon as we got to the bar, Ben bought us all a round of shots. Then I grabbed TB and dragged him out to the dance floor. I had promised him I would teach him the Texas 2-Step, and I had every intention of keeping that promise.

"This is it??" He said, "It's so easy!"

"Well yea, it's a 2-step! But you have to guide me! And don't run me into people." I said with a chuckle, just as he steered me into another couple.

Then he grabbed me tighter and started steering me around, running into people left and right!

"Sorry! It's his first time!" I called out to the disgruntled dancers as we passed.

"Ok, that's enough." I said to TB.

But he wouldn't stop! I mean, it was kind of fun at first, but I was getting tired of being used as a human shield as he bowled people over on the dance floor. I shook him off me and began walking back towards the bar.

"Ok, I am definitely not dancing with you anymore!" I laughed, trying to make light of the situation.

"Terrie! Come back, I was just kidding." He said.

I whirled. Terrie??

He was looking right at me. I raised an eyebrow and kept walking.

"Terrie!" He called again, "Terrie wait!"

By this time, I was really pissed. I ignored him and went to the bar to talk to Bethany. JC came over and tried to convince me that he hadn't really been calling me Terrie.

"You know full well that he did! Like five times! I knew this was a bad idea." I said.

"Yea, but you can't be mad at him!" JC said, "And what do you mean it's a bad idea?"

"I'm not mad, I'm annoyed! And it's a bad idea because nothing can come of this!"

That was about the time that Law School showed up. I ranted to him about it for a while, then the whole group left to go to the bar next door. We met Taryn and Sheila there and got a table and some champagne. In retrospect, the champagne was probably a bad idea. I didn't talk to TB anymore that night, and he didn't try to talk to me either. Instead, I hung out with Law School and Taryn. Everything starts to get fuzzy at this point, with moments of clarity. Apparently, around 1:30am I decided I wanted to leave, and I dragged Law School out of the bar with me. We walked next door, where one of my friends bartends so I could say hello to her. Law School and I were bullshitting and bantering like usual. And I remember we were just standing there, looking at each other and I...kissed him! I didn't even think twice about it, I just did it!

And he kissed me back! Lol.

We left shortly after that, because it was closing time. We took a cab back to his place, made out some more, and then crashed. That is, until I woke up and puked my guts out in his bathroom. Ugh... Not my finest moment.

When we woke up, we talked and bantered some more. He teased me about TB, who was apparently blowing up my phone all night. Then he drove me to my car and I went home. And it was like... I dunno! I mean, I don't wanna say it was like the kiss never happened, but it wasn't awkward, ya know??

So I texted him when I got home.

Me: Umm...there are a lot of things I don't remember about last night. But kissing you is not one of them.

LS: Haha...in the bar or when we got back?

Me: Shut the front door! Don't take advantage of my hazy memory! I know I didn't kiss you when we got back, cuz I was too busy puking!

LS: No, the puking came a little while after we got back.

Me: Yea but still...I didn't kiss you when we got back!

Me: ...did I?

LS: Yes we did.

Me: Lol... Seriously?? Way to take advantage of the drunk girl! Well...I'm sorry, I'm not sorry! I'm a cocksman!

Me: So what else did we do?

LS: Haha. Nothing else that I remember.

Me: Well I don't remember anything! That hardly seems fair. We really kissed when we got back???

LS: Not fair? And yes we did.

Me: Well then why don't I remember it?! Cuz I remember kissing you at the bar, and I somehow ended up with one of their business cards in my purse.

LS: Business card? I have no idea. I don't know why you don't remember but you were drunk.

Me: Damn...I can't believe I kissed you, and you didn't even do anything to deserve it!

Me: YOU STILL HAVEN'T EVEN TAKEN ME OUT TO DINNER! Lol.*

*He promised to take me out to dinner like...months ago to celebrate his getting a new job.

LS: Did TB take you to dinner?? Haha ;)

Me: FUCK YOU! And no. Lol.

LS: Hahahahaha....that was mean. Sorry. I take it back.

Me: Well I would apologize to you, for my cheap, drunken advances, but I'm not sorry. Lol. I've wondered about kissing you for a while now. Curiosity I suppose.

LS: Haha. 1) you still "won" bc he came down here and called you forever last night. 2) I'm not exactly sure how to respond to the former. Say it's mutual, or make a joke.

Me: Lol, ok well 1) I wasn't even aware it was a competition, and I don't really care anyways. 2) you could just set aside your petty defenses and be honest.

LS: Haha...I'm shy, so it takes me a while to not have defenses. But, what wouldn't be curious about a good looking girl.

Me: You're SHY? Bullshit! It's not like I'm a complete stranger, you can't use that excuse! And we're effing texting, which is the most impersonal form of communication.

LS: I know it doesn't seem like it, but I am really shy. But yes...of course I thought about it, and it crossed my mind.

LS: I mean, of course I thought about kissing you before, but I don't know what your mindset was and wasn't going to be weird.

Me: Well it's not fair that I can't remember half of what happened, and you can! And I'm not the type to beat around the bush, so I think we should do it again. Lol.

LS: Haha...I can probably handle that.

Summer and Ben are hosting a White Elephant Sex Toy Christmas Cocktail Party on Monday. Lol. What a mouthful! So I invited Law School to go with me. And he's gonna come! So I'll be sure to let you all know how that goes.

Today, I am extremely hungover and I have to go to work in 4 hours. Ugh... I'm still feeling very...incredulous about last night. I mean, what a strange turn of events. TB texted me this morning, guilt tripping me, saying he had "no fun at all" last night. Sure didn't seem like that to me! I just said I was sorry for the way things turned out last night, but I didn't appreciate being called by another girl's name, or being used a battering ram on the dance floor, and that we were both drunk, and I was sorry for lashing out at him. Then he asked me if I wanted to come over! G's, I try to let him down gently and he just can't take a hint! ((Sigh)) I told him I was sick and would be staying in bed all day. Which is very true.

Well, I'm gonna eat and take a nap before I have to get ready for work!

Holiday Season Is Coming

I know it's been a few days since I've written. I was in Austin for the weekend, and I've just been insanely busy trying to prepare for the holidays!

The end of last week was a little hard, but I made it through, and everything is fine.

TB has still been calling/texting regularly. And honestly...I just don't know what opinions to form on this situation. I mean I told him, when I first met him, that I'm not looking for any kind of relationship; just fun, and trying to get my life back on track, picking up the pieces, etc. And he seemed to totally get it. I just never expected him to stick around! And yes, obviously, I've been texting him back, because it's been nice just to have somebody to talk to... someone who obviously really wants to talk to me, and get to know me. And it's kind of been a while since I've had that. But now he's talking about making another trip out here! And that makes me really nervous, because I don't want him to expect anything, sexual or otherwise. And I told him that too, but he still wants to come!! So, I guess there's not really anything I can do or say to discourage him, aside from stopping all communication. But I don't want to do that. I like him, he's fun and interesting.

Anyways, Cory just got in town tonight. And we have plans to hang out this week. Possibly even tomorrow! I wonder how that's gonna be... Eh, he's funny and cool, I'm sure it'll be fine.

Tomorrow I have to leave work early to go to the doctor. I have to get blood work done. I'm really nervous, I hate needles! But I've noticed that over the past couple of years, I've lost like 30% of the density of my hair! And it's really making me nervous. Hence, the blood work.

But afterwords, I'm gonna meet Emma for dinner, and then get a mani/pedi. So that will be fun.

Austin was nice. I didn't do any partying, just hung out with Izzie and the baby, did a little shopping, and saw New Moon. I loved it! I mean, as a movie. I thought this adaptation was much better than Twilight. As far as the books go, that's a whole different story, but can I just say that Taylor Lautner is totally a hot piece of ass!? ((sigh)) If only he was older...

I can't believe that Thanksgiving is just around the corner! My parents and Sophie won't be here, but Jenna and Izzie are coming into town! So I'll be at the grandparents' house on Thursday with Jenna, and then a group of us, including Cory, are going out Thursday night! I can't wait!

And then this weekend, me and the girls leave for our trip!!! I can't wait!!

Ok, well it's just about midnight now, so time for bed.

Attention Please!

Ok, well! So many things to address...
After reading all your comments, bad and good, my first conclusion was, "Ok, I'm just gonna stop blogging. I'm sick of feeling like I need to justify my words, and my actions to these people. They don't know me, and they have no right to judge me". And that's the truth!
But, on the other hand, this wouldn't be the first time I've resorted to quitting blogger because of a few rude comments. And I'm really not the type of person to do something like that. And I enjoy blogging! So now, let me just make something clear. When I respond to comments, whether in the form of another comment, or in a post, I write exactly what I would say, if we were having this conversation in person... i.e., "fuck you!"
If that girl (I'm assuming it's a girl, because I really don't think I have any male readers) had told me to my face that I needed to act like an adult, and don't screw this up, etc... I would have straight up said "fuck you" to her face. But then I remembered, that I, unlike that girl, am not a timid person, and I'm not afraid to stand up for myself, and if I've got something to say to somebody, I say it to their face. Unlike the anonymous commenters who have nothing nice to say. So I don't feel my actions were out of line at all. If someone came up to you, and bashed you, and told you you were immature, and wrong in the decisions you made, decisions you felt pretty good about, how would you feel? What would you say to that person? I would hope that you would stand up for yourself. Unfortunately, none of you actually know me, and I don't actually know any of you, so we can't have a face to face conversation.
And as for the comment about me being "too boy crazy" and just moving right on to the next guy, that is not the case at all. I'm not moving right on to the next guy. I'm single! I'm having fun! What would you have me do?? Hole up in my apartment like a shrew?? Not go anywhere, or do anything?? I'm taking it day by day. Catching the curveballs that are thrown my way; sometimes I throw them back, and sometimes I hold onto them for a while. But I'm not trying to make TB my new boyfriend. And yes, I admit it! I'm boy crazy! I'm a straight, young woman, with a healthy sexual appetite! And if I wasn't boy crazy, would half of you even still be reading this blog?? Cuz I think it would probably be pretty boring. So, think what you like, but I know that there is nothing wrong with the decision I made to sleep with TB. I feel good about that decision, and I don't regret it at all. And actually, I have made a new friend! He's still been texting me every day. And yesterday, he even mentioned flying back to Houston again soon, because he had so much fun when he was here!
And as for all my supportive readers, I'm sorry if I don't give you guys props enough for your encouraging comments. I do sometimes mention you in the beginning of my blogs. Sometimes it's just an acknowledgement, but I'll try to pay more attention to you in the blog. Because I do really appreciate you guys! It's nice to know that there are people out there who aren't judging me, or talking shit! I mean, everyone needs a little encouragement from time to time. Everyone likes to hear that they've done something right, once in a while, instead of something wrong. Because people are usually so much quicker to point out your mistakes, than your accomplishments. So here's to my positive feedbackers! You are the ones who keep me blogging! :) REALLY! Because when I start to have second thoughts about continuing to write, the first thing that pops into my mind is my loyal followers! Obviously, I'm doing something right, to keep you guys reading, and I don't want to disappoint you.
But anyways, that's my 2 cents on the comment issues. As for everything else, I'm really excited about my trip to Austin this weekend. Izzie and I have been talking back and forth constantly about our ideas for the agency, and what we're gonna do this weekend (go shopping and see New Moon, just to name a few!). It's gonna be a great little getaway. And then next week is Thanksgiving! Izzie will be here for that too, and she's invited me to spend the holiday with her family, since mine will all be in Florida. :(
I'm still not sure what I'm going to do for Thanksgiving though, because Jenna will be in town, so we may be having dinner at my aunts or grandparents' house. But if not, I'll spend Thanksgiving with Izzie. OH! And Cory's going to be in town as well. He got in touch with me just the other night, and we have plans to grab cocktails Wednesday and/or Thursday night. So that should be fun. Izzie is going to come with us, since her Mom will be able to watch the baby.
It's going to be a great week! I'm excited.
Oh, and tomorrow is Brandon's 27th birthday. I wonder if he'll grow up at all this year...

I'm Back!

OMG I have so much exciting news! First of all, I finally got some booty! Lol. And it was definitely exactly what I needed to just...get me across that bridge. I mean, I had already made the decision to cross it, after my talk with Aaron, and I just...needed to do something to act on it! So me and Tommy Bahama (JC's friend from out of town) ended up going out to dinner Thursday! Then on Friday, I was pleasantly surprised to find myself out of work by 1am! So I hightailed it over to Washington to meet up with TB, JC, Ben, Mark and everybody. I had a little bit of a power hour, which was just enough to get me feeling free. Free of the stress, and pressures of the work week, and ready to let loose and have some fun! And that's exactly what I did!

Soo...Tommy Bahama and I hung out all night, and we both ended up back at JC's place, and first we were just sitting there, talking, about anything and everything! And then one thing led to another... And before I knew it, I was a liberated woman! FREE AT LAST!!

I mean, I know it was more of a mental thing than anything else, because I did this for myself. And it was fun! And, I feel like this huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders! It's like...I'm back! HAHAHA!!

I know, I may seem a little extremist, and maybe you think it was irresponsible, or foolish to sleep with a guy I just met, but guess what? I don't care! Just know, that I didn't do it for revenge. I didn't do it because I hoped that Brandon would find out and come crawling back. I just did it for me. And I don't care if he finds out or not. I really feel like I'm over him! I mean, not completely. But mostly. The pain is pretty much gone. I don't fall asleep thinking about him, or panic about going to the bar and seeing him, or wonder what he's doing or what girl he's with. I just don't care!

So obviously, I was in a very elated mood all day Saturday. Nothing could get me down! After work, Taryn and I went over to JC's again, because it was TB's last night in Houston! Unfortunately, by the time I got there, all the guys were just about ready to pass out. So I said my goodbyes to TB, and finally headed home, completely exhausted.

On Sunday, I slept till like 4:30pm! I had a whole week's worth of sleep to catch up on. TB had already left to go home to Colorado. He's originally from Colorado, but he's been living and working in the Bahamas for the last few months. Anyways, I talked to Melissa on the phone about everything, and she just kept gushing to me about TB, asking me when I'm gonna see him again, etc. And I promptly set her straight. I have no plans to see him again, and even though I think he's a nice guy, he already served his purpose. To help me move on. I mean, nothing could come of it anyway; he lives in Colorado!

But the funny thing is, he hasn't stopped texting me since! He was texting me all day today while I was at work. And honestly, it was a welcome distraction, cuz after the weekend I had, I was having trouble staying awake. Oh, and while I'm on that subject, let me just point out that my boss specifically told me, I can come in and leave whenever I want, as long as I put in my 40 hours. And last week, I put in 45 hours! So don't bitch at me about how this is my "chance to be an adult"! Fuck you! I AM being an adult! I got this job myself, I support myself, I may not be perfect, but I'm a big girl, goddammit and I'm not stupid. So don't talk to me like I am.

Sorry if that sounded a little harsh, but like I said, I'm a new woman. Very liberated.

So anyways, Tommy Bahama has been texting me all day, asking me all kinds of questions about myself, and what I like to do for fun, and what kind of guys I date, and what my longest relationship was. Stuff that only a genuinely interested guy would ask, right?

It's strange...

Anyways, so this project I started working last week, I finished 2 days early! And my boss was incredulous! So yayyy points for me! Except today I think he was scrambling around trying to find things for me to do, cuz he thought I'd still be working on last week's project. Oh well. At least he was impressed! Well, I really should be going to bed soon. ((Sigh))

Goodnight World!

Make a Move

OMG! So last night, I went out to dinner with a bunch of people from the bar for Sheila's birthday. And Taryn was there, with a couple of her friends, including a guy in town from the Bahamas, who I couldn't help notice was pretty good looking. So I discreetly asked her about him at dinner (we were texting under the table), and she informed me that he's single! Except, he's only gonna be here till Sunday. But what the hell! So I told her to drop a few hints for me, and sniff around little bit. Which she did. She told him I thought he was cute, but I ended up having to go home relatively early, and nothing came of it. Oh well.
So for the last hour, I've been sitting at my desk, doing some gruelling spreadsheet work, and fantasizing about my nap when I get home, when Taryn texts me! Apparently her friend from the Bahamas wants to know what I'm doing tonight! :D Her other friend, JC, is texting me too, asking me what I'm doing. Apparently him and Bahama Boy are going out tonight. Unfortunately, Taryn is working, but she says I should hang out with them. And I'm definitely considering it! She wants us to come visit her at work. Of course, I can't be out late, though. I was in bed by midnight last night, which was a miracle, and I still barely made it to work today cuz I overslept. Ugh. But as long as I get here before my boss does, it's ok! Hehe.
Well now I'm just patiently awaiting a text back from JC. So I guess we'll see what happens! But I definitely gotta get the hell out of this office! Thank God tomorrow is Friday...

P.S. Brandon was at the dinner last night, and I totally followed my game plan! He got there late and had to sit at the very end of the table by himself. I honestly felt sorry for him! But he walked down the entire length table to say hi, when he got there. I said hi back, and that was it! Easy as pie.