Monday, December 15, 2008

Playing Catch Up

So, there are a couple things I forgot to mention over the last couple weeks and I should probably jot them down quickly, just in case they are of any later importance.

1. The Model texted me over Thanksgiving asking if I was working. I didn't respond. I did, however, run into him a couple days later when I was out with Bethany. Our exchange was not initiated by me, and I made sure to keep it brief. Go me!

2. This past Saturday I went down to Galveston for a motorcycle rally with Alyssa and her boyfriend Russ. And I rode with John. Brandon was totally cool with it, of course, and I asked him before I agreed to go. John kind of just called me out of the blue, and asked if I wanted to ride with him. I told him I needed to check with Brandon first, just so the boundaries were clear, and he said that was fine. So Brandon was all for it and told me to have fun, so I went! And I did. It was only slightly awkward. Hehe.

3. I still have not seen Daniel, even once, since we broke up. And this past Saturday (same day as the motorcycle rally) was Russ's birthday. Alyssa set up a birthday dinner for him, and I told her that Brandon and I would both be there. And in the back of my mind, I knew that Daniel would be there. But we ended up not going because I got home so late from the rally, and Brandon had completely forgotten about the dinner, and neither of us were really prepared to go. Plus we both had to work, so we just chilled at home.
Confrontation avoided.

I think that's about it for playing catch up. Ummm...in other news, I've been really worried lately about my job, and my finances, and my lack of medical insurance. ((sigh)) I definitely need to go to the dentist, for one. I'm starting to get a toothache, which is not normal for me. Cuz I have good teeth! So I'm worried I might have a cavity or something, and I don't wanna end up with a root canal! I mean that's definitely worst case scenario, but still.... I'm paranoid. And the other thing is, Brandon's been talking lately about his job, and his 401k, and it's just made me realize that I'm so behind! I don't have a 401k! I can't even go to the freakin' dentist! I'm not set up for life at all! I need a job. A real job with paid vacation, and benefits, and opportunities. But I still have no clue what I wanna do, or what I have to offer. And it really sucks.
At least my relationship is going well. Brandon is really great. When we got in that fight last week, he was just so apologetic, and sincere.... And I mean, he definitely has his flaws, but unlike all the other guys, he takes responsibility for his mistakes! He doesn't try to get away with anything. He's honest. He admits when he's wrong, and then he immediately tries to correct his mistakes. And I just love that about him.
Question: Sometimes he calls me "My Love" and I'm not really sure how to interpret that... Any ideas?
He's never told me he loves me, except once when he was wasted. And he made sure to include "as a person" at the end of it. Lol.
But I think I do love him. In fact I know I do. At least, I'm starting to. I'm not trying to rush things though, so I wanna make sure before I tell him. And it would be nice if he said it first.
I just can't get enough of him. He's so...wonderful. I mean, I feel like I've won the boyfriend lottery!
Well, I'm about to pass out. My bed is calling...


Anonymous said...

I'd say it's more of an endearing thing. Obviously has to be some connection, but it's not in lieu of the "I love you" type thing. Plus, if you're sure you love him, and certain.. wouldn't you want to let him know? Instead of doing the whole waiting/game thing? I don't know, just seems more real to me. I hope you figure out what to do in regards to your career soon.

Anonymous said...

I waited for my boyfriend (now husband) to say I love you to me first. It took 6 months, but it was waaaay worth the wait. Then we didn't have some awkward moment where I said it, and he didn't say it back. And by that time I was really sure that my feelings were real and not lust or infatuation. And I felt like it wasn't leaving me so vulnerable, if you know what I mean.

Ashley said...

How long have you and Brandon been together? It's hard to keep track in blog time but it seems like 2 months or so. I think it's great you are so happy! Everyone deserves a good dose of love every now and then! HAPPY HO-HO-HO-Holidays!

Anonymous said...

i think you shouls just roll with the "my love" name and just enjoy it. my bf has names for me, and i like it when he calls me them now ( i didnt think i would be a pet name type of person before i met him) :) anyways, its his way of showing that he cares for you!its like letting you know he loves you without exactly tellling you yet, just throwing it out there. you should start calling him "lovey". Sounds like you guys are in a really good place!