Ok, so I don't really have any justification for why I talked to Brazil last week. I wasn't trying or hoping to achieve anything really, I just...wanted to talk to him! But his whole "woe is me" tact actually really turned me off, and I think that actually I may have inadvertently given myself some kind of closure. I haven't spoken to him since then, or even thought about speaking to him. In fact, I haven't been thinking about him nearly as much at all. So maybe it was stupid of me to talk to him, but in the end, I think it actually did me some good.
I've been staying busy lately, as always during the school year, and this week is going to be packed. Tomorrow night, I'm getting a tattoo. My first tattoo! I'm really nervous, but also really excited! I'm not going to tell you guys what it is, just that it's script. Two words. You can try to guess though, that might be interesting, haha. Sophie and Katie are coming too, and Katie is getting a tattoo as well! Sophie isn't though, she's just coming for moral support, and you know, in case I pass out. Lol. I have a track record with needles...
So me and Katie were we were having lunch, talking about our tattoos, and planning out when we're gonna meet tomorrow etc, and we got on the subject of roommates. She currently doesn't have one, but she was saying she needs one for next year, and I was like, "Dude...*I* need a roommate for next year!"
So we're totally gonna be roomies! I'm so excited! For one thing, it'll be nice to be able to decorate our place with our own style. Dane has this place decorated so...boring and boyish. And since it's not my home, I would feel weird hanging any of my stuff anywhere besides my bedroom. Also the bathroom. Living with guys has been great overall, but I'm really looking forward to not having to share a bathroom with a dude!! UGh... And you all know how I feel about Dane's girlfriend...
So Katie and I are gonna get a place probably sometime in August, which is perfect! I'm so excited, and so relived because I knew I was going to have to move out soon, but I had no idea who I would live with, or how I'd be able to afford living alone. Plus, Katie and I get along great, we're both photo students, and we have similar lifestyles, etc... It's gonna be great!
Bill and I were supposed to hang out this Sunday, but I was bogged down with homework, so I asked him for a raincheck, and he said sure. We've been texting every day and all that, but this time I think I have all the cards. For one I'm not nearly as invested as I was last time he and I went out, or whatever. Also, I'm very skeptical of him now, and after what happened with Brazil, I know I can never be too cautious. And thirdly, although I initially texted Bill with intention of using him as a sort of rebound, I think I am starting to get over Brazil, and I've gotten some closure, so I think I'm in the perfect place mentally for dating. I don't feel so...desperate (for lack of a better word) to find someone (read: boyfriend) and I'm not in a hurry to jump into anything like I may have been with Brazil. And I'm gonna make Bill work for it. If he's not that into me, then fine, I'll just stop talking to him. But this time around, I'm definitely gonna make him pursue me. No hanging out at his place, watching TV. That never seems to lead to anything good...
So I'm doing alright you guys. I'm movin' on up.
4 comments:
Good for you!
Have fun getting your tatoo. Enjoy your time with the girls!
Good for you!! I know it's hard living in a relatively new place and needing some stability, but deciding that you are ok with yourself being single is the best thing you can do for YOU. I'm sorry if I seemed harsh on the last post and honestly did not mean to make you feel bad. I'm positive all of the comments came from a place of "you are too good to be spending so much emotional energy on this trainwreck of a guy!" I would tell any of my friends the same thing. We girls put up with a LOT of crap that we shouldn't have to and men will definitely take full advantage if they can. Cause let's face it, our generation of men are lazy when it comes to dating. Get busy being your fabulous self and fill your time with fun activities. And when you do want to date? Really think about what your expectations are and how you want to be treated in a relationship. Don't bend from that for the sake of a guy's situation or "issues". The right guy will be happy to treat you the way you want to be treated. And if a guy you meet doesn't? Bonus! You know it a lot faster and avoid emotionally investing in someone who isn't the right guy. You can walk away with your head held high and know you didn't allow someone to take advantage of you and your giving nature.
So glad to hear. I think you have a really good perspective on the situation, right now, and damn girl, make them work for you!
Get at it!
I'm glad talking to him helped you get some closure....I figured it might especially with what I personally thought was his bag attitude. No offense cuz I know I don't know him personally or anything.
I know other commentors have said things about you going from loser to loser etc but I think you doing what feels right at the time is OK. Maybe I am biased because I dated my share of losers....had people tell me they were losers...but eventually I figured out what I wanted & found the right guy. I am not saying that you are dating losers by the way...that is a subjective opinion.
Just merely pointing out that I believe you will be in a good relationship and you won't regret the journey that got you there because it will be a part of HOW you got there :)
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