Friday, March 6, 2009

Too Available

Last night was my only night off this week and Brandon and I had plans to go out. I mean we had plans. And I called him around 8 to find out when he was picking me up and when he answered the phone he sounded like he just woke up or something.
"Are you sleeping??" I asked.
"No, I'm just laying down, watching TV." He said.
"Oh. Well we're still going out, right?"
"Yea, later." He replied.
"Well, when? You're not gonna fall asleep, are you???" I asked, panic creeping into my voice.
"No, I wont. I'll come over at 10." He assured me.
"Ok," I said, "Well I'm gonna call you around 9:30, just in case." I said.
"Alright, talk to you soon."

And that was pretty much our whole conversation. So I went about getting ready; very carefully choosing my outfit, since it's very rare that Boyfriend and I get to spend a night out together. Then 9:30 rolls around and I call him, and he doesn't answer! So I called him back like 4 more times, figuring maybe he didn't hear his phone or something, but he never answered!
So I sent him a text.

"Brandon! Where are you??? It's 9:50! You have 10 minutes to either get here, or call me back! If you stand me up tonight, I'm gonna be really mad!"

And stand me up he did.
I sent him another text that said, "Thanks a lot".
By 11 o'clock, I was all dressed up with no place to go, and so disappointed that I almost just went to bed. But then I got a text from Evan so I decided to go out with him instead. We met up with Alex (she was at Sophie's wedding, remember?) and her boyfriend, and overall we had a pretty good time! 

Today when I woke up, I had a text from Brandon saying he was sorry, he fell asleep and that he was going to come over when he finished playing golf.
So I texted him back, "What time are you gonna be done?"
And he never responded.

A few hours went by and I then I called him.
No answer.
Another hour went by and I tried him again.
Still no answer.
By this time, I wasn't just mad. I was frustrated, and hurt and upset. I mean...hello!? I can't really think of any excuse for that behavior. I'm his girlfriend for God's sake! Especially after he ditched me last night, he should be trying to make it up to me, not continuing to ignore me!
I sat and thought about it for a while, and I couldn't help but here the echoing chime of Melissa's voice telling me that you can never be too available, even for your boyfriend. ((Sigh)) And the worst part is that now I know she's right.

So finally, around 5 o'clock, he called me. I didn't answer.
He called again. I still didn't answer. I was full-blown pissed by now.
He sent me a text. 
"Sorry, I forgot my phone at home when I went to play golf."
"Does it never occur to you that I might want or need to talk to you??" I responded. He's always "forgetting" his phone, or leaving in the car, or it's dead whenever I need to talk to him!!
"Sorry I didn't know till I was already at the course." He said.
"Well right now I'm feeling kind of...discarded. And shitty. And I'm frustrated and upset." I wrote.
He tried calling me again. I didn't answer. I knew if I talked to him he would just somehow make me forget the entire reason I was pissed in the first place. And I was determined to prove my point!
"I don't feel like talking on the phone right now." I texted him.
Then I went back to the movie I was watching.
Thirty more minutes went by and he tried calling again. I still didn't answer. I'm not going to talk to him until I see him at work. I mean I'm seriously upset. It's not fair that I always make him a priority, when apparently, I'm not one of his.


Anonymous said...

I get the whole 'you shouldn't be too available for your boyfriend' thing, but I think him standing you up, and not answering/returning calls and texts is BS! He's your boyfriend, not a casual relationship thing and there is no excuse for that. If he didn't want to go out that night, he should have just said so, not leave you waiting not knowing what was going on.

As for the forgetting the cell phone thing, my boyfriend does that too, or forgets to charge it, and it drives me NUTS! I could go on and on about the baffling things he 'forgets' to do, but I won't bore you with that here, and I'm sure you experience many of them yourself.

Never been stood up by him though. Seeing as we live together, that would be hard to do......But anyway, being stood up by your BOYFRIEND and then not being able to get ahold of him is not something you should ever have to worry about. Casual relationships/flings, yes, boyfriends, NO.

Can't wait to hear about how you give him hell for it! Good luck!


DDgirl said...

Don't get too angry Peyton, it's just... guys are like that you know?

Just calmly explain him you need him to be more available, and anyway do not give up your life for him!!!

Nic said...

Pfew, after reading the title I thought you guys broke up.

Guys are all forgetfull like that. I haven't ever met a guy who not forgot to text his girlfriend on time or charge his phone.

I get frustrated if I don't get a response on my text within a few hours (boyfriend), or day (date). And I told my best friend that I knew something was wrong with one of my dates when I hadn't received a message after a day. And she was like, Well I sometimes need to go 2 days before I get a message from boyfriend. 2 days!!! I would have killed him by then.

The standing up was pretty bad. He says he's going to be there, he's not there and he doesn't answer his phone. What about a car accident???

Good thing of you by not responding to him. Let him sweat a little.

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Anonymous said...

I agree; your "boyfriend" should not stand you up, or repeatedly not answer your calls. I think you are handling this in a very mature way, but I do think you have a right to be angry. Make sure you let him know how it makes you feel when this happens and if he's not willing to listen, maybe he's not the right guy for you. The right guy will listen and care when something he's doing hurts you.