All Work and No Play...

Well it turns out Taryn lost the baby. She was having problems, and when she went in for an ultrasound, there was no heartbeat. The baby had stopped developing. So she had to have surgery. Even though I am relieved for her in the sense that she wasn't prepared for a baby, I'm also really sad, and worried about her. The same thing happened to Jenna this past summer, and she was devastated. Granted, she and Justin have been trying to have another baby for a while, and that wasn't her first miscarriage. I just know it can sometimes take a while for it to sink in. But Taryn seems to be doing fine. She and Dahmer are apparently still together (ugh) and she says he's been great, but now that they don't have a baby coming, we'll see how long that lasts...

I've been keeping busy with work, but I'm awfully lonely here most of the time. Other than my family, and Bethany, I don't know anybody here, and my job isn't exactly conducive to making friends, which is unfortunate. Somehow I gotta get myself out there and meeting people. Any ideas? Oh yea, I've also adopted a cat, so my transition into full-blown cat lady is finally beginning. Although I must say, I'm not a cat person. I mean I adopted for the right reasons, and Jasper seems to enjoy having some company when I'm gone. His fascination with Hobbes (cat) is infinite. But Hobbes and I haven't really...bonded. And sometimes he's mean to Jasper for no reason, which pisses me off. Like, Jasper will be laying on the bed, minding his own business, then Hobbes will jump up and bite him! For no reason! And then Jasper jumps down cuz he's scared, the big baby. Any of you cat people have experience with this? How long does it take to feel bonded with a cat?? I mean, I love all animals, don't get me wrong, I just feel like I've learned something about myself. And that is that I am not a cat person. But he's mine now and it's not like I'm going to take him back to the shelter just because we haven't totally hit it off. Maybe it will get better with time? ((Sigh))

Well I'm heading to Houston for Thanksgiving this year. I get to meet Dad's new girlfriend. Yay. (Can you sense the sarcasm?) Other than that, I don't really have much news. God, when did my life become so...boring?!

What Else Can I DO???

Taryn is pregnant. With her horrible ex's baby. He dumped her like a year ago, and all this time they've been on-again, off-again, her hoping he would take her back for real this time. So many times he came crawling back to her with promises of going to therapy, and promises of change, but he just keeps screwing her over, and she just keeps taking him back! It's sooooo frustrating. He's turned her into one of those desperate, pathetic girls who goes through his phone constantly, and contacts all the girls he dates on facebook, telling them to stay away. She is THAT GIRL. And now she's pregnant, and part of me can't help but wonder, "Did she do this on purpose?" Because when it comes to him, I'm just not sure what she's capable of anymore! She's only 6 weeks, but I think she thinks she's going to get her happy ending with him and this baby. She says that he's "on board with it" and he even went to the doctor with her. Well that's what a supportive father-to-be is supposed to do!! He doesn't deserve a medal for that, I mean COME ON!!! And he's still talking to other girls, and she knows it. She just chooses to turn a blind eye! It's only a matter of time now before she catches him in a lie, or catches him talking to some other girl, or goes through his phone and finds something she's not gonna like.
Why do some girls do this to themselves?? I really don't understand!
Let me just paint you a picture of Taryn, ok? She has the perfect body. She works out constantly. She's about 5'6", looooooong beautiful, thick brown hair, one of those really dazzling smiles. She's one of those girls that really is actually sweet. She's compassionate, and considerate and kind. She's fun, and outgoing, but never overbearing. She does love kids, I'll give her that. She has 3 nieces that she just adores. I'd like to say that she's smart, but I'm not so sure... For one thing, she never finished college. That is the one good thing I can say about Dahmer (her ex): that he encouraged her to go back to school. Although, encouraged isn't exactly the right word. More like shamed her into it by making her think she wasn't good enough for him. Ugh. But not finishing school isn't really the issue. It's that she doesn't have any real marketable skills. All she's done her entire adult life is bartend. And there's nothing wrong with that either, hell, I've done it too! The problem is that she doesn't seem to have any goals or aspirations, other than to get married! It's pretty plain to see that she's just been waiting for some guy to come along and sweep her off her feet and take care of her. And now that she's pregnant, she can't exactly continue bartending at 7-8 months, so I'm assuming she expects him to take care of her. And that really worries me, because he's proven time and time again that he's unreliable, untrustworthy, selfish and immature. She does have a lot of family in Houston with her, so at least if he bails she won't be totally on her own, but still... Why can't she see how bad he is for her?? How her life completely revolves around him and all her common sense goes right out the window!
From my own selfish standpoint, this isn't good because I've have outwardly hated on Dahmer since they broke up, including throwing a beer in his face. All because of Taryn!! She told me bad things about him, told me she was done with him for good, that she hated him! And I hated him right along with her. Stupid me. I should have known better. Now if they do end up together, I can never show my face around the 2 of them. ((Sigh))
Well, it's still early. Even though she's talking about keeping the baby and living happily ever after as if that's actually an achievable goal, anything could happen. I just want Taryn to have a great guy, who loves her unconditionally and and appreciates her and makes her happy. Not a selfish asshole who runs around on her and makes her crazy! And now I worry that she'll never get those things. Not as long as Dahmer is in the picture. I've told her this, believe me. And I told her I'd support her whatever she decides to do. Because what else can I do?? I mean seriously, tell me! What else can I do??

A Great Week

So I just got back to Chicago this morning, and I have been sleeping for the past 7 hours. Lol. Being out in the sun all day and running on ~4 hours of sleep a night will do that to you I guess. I didn't even make it to improv! Oh well... In fact, I've been perusing facebook and noticing that Lane and Rose have been spending a lot of time together, and it's really irritating me. I dunno WHY, because I like Rose, and I'm totally over Lane. I just feel...resentful I guess. That he could just drop me like that and move on to some other girl who also happens to be in our class. I mean I don't know if they're really seeing each other or anything. I'm probably just reading into it too much. ((Sigh)) I fuckin' hate guys.
Well at least my facebook page is currently littered with happy posts and tons of pictures of all the awesome shit I've done in the past week. So he can suck on that! Lol, not really, but I wish... I just can't get that feeling out of my stomach like I really need to one-up him somehow. This is fucking stupid! Why do I even care?? They're probably not even dating! I mean, she just broke up with her boyfriend! But who knows? I mean we weren't really dating either.

Anyway, I'll pick up from where I left off at the ranch...

So Carrie, Rory and I got back and everyone was out by the fire pit, which has this really long sidewalk, which leads to this like giant circle with these huge pillars all around it. It's really neat looking. And of course there's a gas powered fire pit in the middle of it, and speakers and an iPod hookup all connected everywhere. The whole house was like that! It's ridic. So anyway, Carrie and I didn't waste any time opening our wine and chugging a glass. Haha. Dawn and Tommy were still shitfaced and causing trouble. Tommy almost fell into the fire, at which point we all noticed his shorts were ripped and his balls were hanging out, literally. His balls were hanging out of his shorts. And when someone brought this to his attention, he proceeded to stick his butt up in the air and wave his balls in everyone's face. It was fucking sick. ((Shudder)) Dawn was being a total white trash bitch about it too. Rory kept trying to get her to eat something and she just wouldn't. Ugh...something about that girl just realllly rubbed me the wrong way after that weekend.
But anyway... The good part is, all the drunkies past out by like midnight, around which time this guy Donny showed up. Taryn had been telling me she wanted to hook me up with him, but he's totally not my type. Really nice guy, just...not my type. So anyway, me, Carrie, Donny and George were the only people still awake. And we were just getting started! I mean, Donny had just arrived, and Carrie and I were just getting our buzz on and I guess George must have gotten a second wind or something. Lol. So we decided to go swimming. And we were having noodle fights, and goofing off when suddenly all the lights went off. I mean utter pitch blackness. We're in the middle of nowhere! The lights for the pool, patio and cabana were all on a timer so they went off at like 2am or something. So we're all just floating silently in the pool like, "What do we do now?" Haha. Then we noticed the sky.
OH.MY.GOD.
I have never seen a sky so beautiful in all my life. It was like we could see every star in the universe! The whole Milky Way, the planets...It was just breath taking. So we all just kind of lay there on pool floats, staring at the sky for who knows how long. It was really an experience. Did I mention we'd smoked some "potpourri" earlier? Lol. I mean the sky really was that awesome, but our heightened state of mind probably made it even more mind-boggling.

Eventually Carrie and I decided to turn in. And the beds were soooo comfortable! I didn't wanna get up in the morning, but I was too hyped about horseback riding to stay in bed! And we finally got to ride! Dahmer and I were the only ones actually interested in riding, but still. It felt so great to be back on a horse. It's been so long! ((Sigh)) I miss riding.
After that, we were all sweaty and gross, so of course we jumped back in the pool for one last dip before hitting the road. Oh, I and I feel like I should mention that Taryn did apologize to everyone for her Little Miss Princess attitude the day before. Which of course, was due to over consumption. Lol.
Before we all left, there was icecream cake for Rory's birthday, and we all thanked Rory's family for putting up with us. On the drive home, the whole gang stopped for some good ole' Texas BBQ. I had my dad pick me up from Taryn and Dahmer's place. And when I got back home, with the intention of napping, I found I couldn't sleep. My shoulders were burned for one, and I wanted to catch up on the blog while the memories were still fresh! :)
But now I'm back in Chi-Town, and finally caught up on my rest. Ahhh...
It really was a great week.

Trouble in Paradise

So somehow, Dahmer and I made it out Friday night. We went to my old bar, then to the shot bar to visit Taryn. After that we headed to a new bar that's opened since I moved. My old friend Tara, who I used to work with at the country bar is working there now! So she totally hooked us up. We also ran into Ben, who's notorious for only partying at the hottest spots. Lol. But we had fun, and were in a cab by 1:30am. Taryn didn't get home for another couple of hours, and Dahmer was already asleep.
The next morning we loaded up the car and were headed out to Rory's family's ranch by 11. We pulled up about an hour later. And it was absolutely breath taking! So much more than what I was expecting. Sooo much land, so many horses, the barn looked like a house, and the house was...whoa. Very impressive. Rory gave us the grand tour upon our arrival, and then we all suited up and jumped in the pool. The awesome saltwater infinity pool with a cabana and hot tub! We spent the entire day in the pool. There was a pretty big group there, which included me Taryn and Dahmer, George, Carrie, and some of Rory's family. And it is sooo hot in the Houston area right now! It was over 110 every single day. But we were in and out of the pool so much it's like we only got out to eat! And I got the most amazing tan!
So last night, I didn't want to drink, because Rory said we were gonna go riding after dinner, and I didn't want to be too drunk to ride. No one else seemed concerned however, and I was pretty much the only sober person. When the sun started setting and dinner still wasn't ready, I began to give up hope that our evening ride was going to happen. It was around this time that all the drama started to go down. I had just walked in the house to wash up for dinner when Dahmer approached me.
"Hey...Taryn's in the last bedroom. Did you wanna talk to her?"

Since I wasn't looking for Taryn, and hadn't even inquired about her, I thought this was a rather odd question, and I'm sure it showed on my face.

"Do I need to talk to her?" I asked.

Dahmer shrugged, "I dunno. She's pretty pissed."


"Why? At who?" I asked.

"At me, maybe?? I don't know, I think she's mad that I didn't put my foot down about us getting our own room."

I raised a brow, "What??"
"Well Rory said it's his parents rule that only the married couples get their own bedroom, so we're all sleeping out in the cabana."
"So?" I said. The cabana happens to be a really bitchin' little house, with 8 beds (4 twins with trundles), all with TempurPedic mattresses, 2 full baths and a pool table. So no complaints here!

"Well I dunno...she's all mad about it."

I sighed. "Ok. I'll go talk to her. But she has no reason to be mad at you."

Dahmer just shrugged again as I walked down the reallllly long hallway past all the suites to the last bedroom. Lol. I knocked on the door.

"Come in."

The room was dark, and all the curtains were drawn.

"Hey," I said as I walked in, "Dinner's almost ready."

Taryn was laying on top of the covers, looking extremely sunburned and very drunk.

"Ok." She said in her soft, higher than normal drunk voice, "I'll come eat in a minute."

"Are you sick?" I asked.

"No...I'm just really tired."

There was another knock at the door.

"Come in!" We both said.

Carrie came in and turn on the light.

"Turn the light off!" Taryn said in a hoarse whisper.

"I just need to get my stuff and move it to the cabana. My shit is everywhere..." Carrie said as she began picking things up and tossing them into her suitcase.

"Ok just turn the light off." Taryn said again, a little impatiently. Carrie and I exchanged, WTF? looks, and she reluctantly turned the light off.

"What's the matter, Taryn? Are you not feeling well?" Carrie asked in a concerned voice.

Taryn signed, "I'm fine...I'm just a little disappointed that [Dahmer] and I don't get our own room. I mean we live together. And I was told before we came out here that we would have our own room, and our own bathroom, and now we're here and I find out we have to sleep in the cabana in a twin bed in a room full of people." She pouted.

"So what? We're guests here. It's only for one night. It'll be like summer camp!" I said, trying to cheer her up.

"Well...I mean, we're not gonna get any privacy."

"It's not like it's your fucking honeymoon!" Carrie interrupted with a laugh.

"I know that, but this is just not what I was expecting. And it really pisses me off that [insert couple here] get to have their own room, just because they're married."

"Those are Rory's parents' rules. They're very conservative." Carrie said, starting to look annoyed. She was pretty sober as well.

"Well, we might end up driving back tonight." Taryn said haughtily. My jaw almost dropped. They were my ride!

"You're kidding me." I said flatly.

Taryn sighed, "Somebody tell me to suck it up."

"SUCK IT UP." I said, more loudly than I intended to, "This place is amazing, and we should be kissing Rory's family's feet for letting us stay here at all. Let's just have a good time, and not stress about stupid shit. Ok?"

"Ok." Taryn sighed with a pout.

Carrie and I left her to get changed while we went to eat.

"I can't believe she's being like this." Carrie said under her breath.

"Me neither! I've never known her to be so..."

"Rude? Selfish? Demanding??" Carrie finished my sentence.

"Uh...yea." I said.

"I need to get the fuck out of here. Where's Rory? He said he wanted to make a beer run. Wanna come?"

"Yes please!" I said.

So as soon as we finished dinner, we piled into Rory's SUV for a drama free drive. We all bitched about the drama that was happening. Apparently Rory was dealing with drama of his own. This girl, Dawn and her husband, Tommy were both completely shitfaced. And Dawn kept talking to Rory's mom about his ex, who she is still friends with. And apparently she was pretty rude. So Rory's mom got all mad at Rory about it...((Sigh)) Poor guy. It's his birthday weekend and he can't even relax and enjoy himself. So the 3 of us made a pact to get hammered. Lol. Hey, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right? So we loaded up on beer and wine, and headed back to the ranch, for round 2 of excitement.

Houston So Far

The last 2 days have been so great! I got into Houston Tuesday night, and Dad and I just hung around the house really. I was pretty tired from all the running around and packing I'd been doing. But on Wednesday, Dad woke up early and went out to get kolaches! One of my favorite and most missed food items that you can only get in the south. SOOOO good! Then we went to the zoo, cuz I've been dying to see their new chimpanzee exhibit. It was super hot of course, but we had a good time. After that, we had a late lunch and headed home.
Mom picked me up around 3:30 and we headed up to my aunt Suzanne's. I hung out with my cousins, and Lexi and I made a fresh blueberry cobbler. It was delicious! We went to bed pretty early that night cuz my mom had to go to work early in the morning. But just when I was starting to fall asleep, Gavin called. I wasn't that surprised to hear from him, being in Houston and all, but usually he just texts, and he didn't even seem interested in seeing me last time I was in town!
As it turned out, he didn't even know I was in Houston! It was just a total coincidence that he called. Then he scolded me for not telling him I was coming. Lol. To which I replied that he definitely gave me the good old brush off last time I was in town, and he said that was because he was afraid if he saw me, he'd cheat on his girlfriend. Hehe. Silly boy... But we chatted for a bit, he said some more dirty and inappropriate things, and I passed out with a guilty smile on my face.

Yesterday, bright and early, Mom and I headed back into the city. She dropped me off at Jenna's, so I could spend the day with her, but we both just went back to sleep for an hour. I went with Jenna to her doctor's appointment at 9:30. Apparently when you're 7 1/2 months pregnant you have to go to the doctor every other week. Ugh... But Jenna and I always have fun no matter what we're doing, so we just talked and goofed off the whole time. After that, we headed to the kolache factory for a quick breakfast (can't get enough kolaches!!) and then we got our nails done. I haven't had a manicure since before her wedding! When we got home, Justin took us out for an authentic Tex Mex dinner, which was really nice of him. Jenna confessed to me that she's worried about Justin not being fully on board for the baby. I guess he's pretty nervous. Hopefully when the baby is born, he'll be more excited, and less anxious. I really like Justin, but sometimes I just can't help but feel that he isn't good enough for Jenna. ((Sigh)) I hope I'm not right.

Anyway, after dinner, I met up with an old friend from high school, Prudence. We rarely see each other anymore, but when we do get to hang out, it's like no time has passed. We're a lot alike: super goofy, same sense of humor, and up for anything, anytime. We went to my old bar, and took wayyy too many (free!) shots. Lol. But I got to see Aaron and Tanya, Mr. P, and Brandon, of course. So over it. Thank god... But Prudence and I had a blast! And I crashed at her and her boyfriend's place last night. Today I am super hungover and wondering how I'm going to make it out again tonight with Dahmer. Lol. I'm staying with him and Taryn tonight. She's actually on her way to get me right now. Prudence and I went and saw Harry Potter again. Well, again for me, first time for her. And I got a free movie ticket! Long story...
But it's off to Taryn's now, and then to the ranch tomorrow morning. I can't wait! Stay tuned...

A Much Needed Night Out

I dunno if I mentioned this before, but Taryn has a new boyfriend, who I have playfully nicknamed Dahmer (inside joke, lol). Anyways, he's super cool, and fun, and nice, yada yada yada... He's definitely good for Taryn, and the fact that he's gotten her to settle down really says something to his character. But anyway, Thursday night we all went out. Since I haven't been working during the week, I've had a lot of spare time, but not a lot of spare cash. But Dahmer convinced me to go up to my bar Thursday and meet him and some of the gang to watch the Texans game. Taryn was working, but scheduled to get off around 11, at which time, we would head out for a night on the town. So I steeled myself, and my wallet, and agreed. Then he insisted on coming to pick me up, so we could share a cab. So I pulled out my silk, skin tight, ruched purple skirt, and my favorite black suede wedges, put on a some mascara and a smile and I was ready!

Dahmer arrived right on time, told me I looked smokin' and opened the car door for me. I couldn't help but blush. It reminded me how long it's been since a guy has picked me up, opened the car door for me, and told me I looked pretty. And even though he wasn't my date, it still felt nice.

When we got to my bar, Bethany was there with her boyfriend, and Cameryn, and the rest of our group was already there hanging out at the bar. So I settled in at the corner of the bar with the group. It was about 9:30, so Taryn was still working, and the bar was crowded with rowdy Texans fans. I guess now would be a good time to introduce a couple new characters. Since Taryn and I have been hanging out a lot more over the last couple of friends, I've kind of melded into her group of friends, which are all pretty cool. First there's Carrie. She's one of Taryn's best friends from back in the day. She was living in Spain up until recently. She's super fun and crazy, and hilarious. The 3 of us always have a blast when we hang out. There's also Rory. He's a big, lovable bear of a guy. Super sweet, and chill.

And then there's George. Ohhh George. He's sarcastic and funny, but he has this...mean streak. Well maybe that's not the best word for it. He just gets into these pouty, brooding moods, and no matter what's going on, nothing can pull him out of it. And he and I tend to butt heads a lot. We like each other, but since we're both so sarcastic, he gets touchy sometimes with me, but I'm used to it by now.

And Dahmer, of course, but I already told you about him. So anyways, all of us were there last night, hanging out, having a good time. Dahmer bought a round of shots, then George did. And Cameryn had a celebratory bottle of champagne since finals week just ended, so I had a glass of champagne. So far, no money spent, yay! And I'm starting to feel a bit of a buzz, having a grand time, when I see Mitchell walk in.

"Hey!" I said to him. He walked over and gave me a hug. As we were hugging, over his shoulder I saw a short, dark haired head do a double take and make a beeline for the opposite direction: Melissa.

I couldn't have been tickled more. Nothing is so satisfying and amusing as her avoiding me the way she does because she feels GUILTY. Lol.

Apparently her new boyfriend is a friend of Mitchell's, so she was with their group. And Mitchell was hanging out with us, not in a hurry to escape to the opposite side of the bar, like Melissa was. It was just so...perfect. Her seeing me there, with my friends, laughing it up, having a fabulous time, and acting completely oblivious to her existence.

She wouldn't even turn her head in my direction if she thought I might see her. Even though I did, a couple of times. She just looked so pathetic, sitting at this little table by herself, off to the side, because she was too afraid to come over and join the group. Hahahahaha. Seriously, I think that made my night.

Of course, we didn't stay there, we went to a couple other bars afterward, and had an awesome night. And the best part? I only spent $4 on a cab ride home. :)

Plus, I just found out today that I'm getting a $10,800 scholarship for school!! Totally wasn't expecting that! Although after looking at the tuition cost, it doesn't seem like that's making much of a dent. But I can't complain about free money! Now I just have to find a place to live, and get some loans. ((Sigh)) So much to do, so little time.