Date at the Diner

Thursday and Friday at work totally sucked. So by Saturday, I was ready to let loose. Work was actually decent, and Brazil texted me early on, asking if I could come over later. He had his surgery or whatever on Thursday, and had been bored at home ever since. So he said he could use some company. He was pretty sore, and the doctor told him he should stay home and take it easy. So, since Brazil lives right down the street from work, I headed to his place when I got off. We hung out for a little bit and talked. He looked pretty worn out, hadn't shaved in a couple of days, and I could tell he wasn't feeling too hot. So we went to bed shortly afterwards. But once we were in bed, things started to sort of heat up... I told him maybe he should just take it easy what with his kidneys and all, but he said he would be ok. So we had some more awesome sex! Then we cuddled and finally fell asleep shortly before 6am.
The next day, we didn't wake up till around 1! He said he had band practice, and I had a lot of piano practicing to do myself, so I decided to head home. But as I was leaving, Brazil asked if I wanted to get dinner later. I smiled and told him sure.
So I spent the rest of the day practicing and laying around the house, till he texted me to make plans. We met at a small diner halfway between both of our houses and had dinner and milkshakes. It was great! And then we both just went our separate ways and went home. Even though we went dutch, I'm still counting it as an actual date. I'm liking him more and more every time we hang out.
His ex is apparently still a problem though... On Saturday night he mentioned that she had called him, but of course, he didn't wanna talk about it. And I didn't press him for details. If he says he doesn't have any intentions of getting back with her, I'm just going to take his word for it. For now anyway. Besides, I'm not going to put all my eggs in one basket just yet. Brazil and I aren't exclusive or anything, so I'm still keeping my options open.
School started today and I had one class at 1pm. It wasn't bad, but Tuesdays and Wednesdays are gonna be rough. I've got 9am classes, and that means I have to get up at 6, which has never been easy for me with my schedule. I'll be lucky if I'm asleep by 2am tonight! ((Sigh))...

Rebound

So the other night after I blogged, I heard back from Brazil. He wanted me to come over and smoke with him. I hadn't smoked in a while, so I said sure. So I powdered my nose, spritzed on a little perfume and headed over there. I already knew he lived right down the street from Sophie and Brent, but it was my first time going to his place.
When I got there, he led me down some stairs, to a cozy little one bedroom apartment. We sat down on his couch, and he put on some tunes and loaded a bowl. We smoked a little and started talking about you know, whatever, small talk. Then the weed started to kick in. And all this time, I'd been thinking about all the stuff I really needed to talk to him about, and how I wasn't even going to kiss him until we'd actually had a conversation. So when he tried to kiss me, I stopped him.

"What? You're not going to kiss me?"

I couldn't help but giggle, in my present state of mind.

"Not yet. I wanna talk to you first."

"About what?"

"Well...I feel like maybe you've gotten the wrong impression of me."

"What do mean? I feel like I'm still getting to know you."

"Yes. You are, but..." I was having a hard time articulating what it was I wanted to say to him. And he kept looking at me very intensely and it was making me laugh. Lol.

"Look, I promised I would be honest with you, so whatever you want to know, just ask." He took my hand and I couldn't help but smile.

"Well, there are just a few things I want to be really clear about."

"Ok..."

"I just...um...I don't like to play games, I know I already told you that, but I just hate feeling like there are things that I wanna say, but I can't because you know, I'm not supposed to or whatever, and I just don't want you to think-"

"You're worried that I think you're easy or something?"

"No! Well...sort of, but probably not in the way that you're thinking"

"Cuz I don't think that all! Quite the opposite actually. I think you're really tough."

"Just...let me finish. Sorry it's taking me so long to say this. This whole conversation is seeming like it's a much bigger deal than it really is just because I'm high and I can't talk." I laughed, again. Lol.

"Well it's nice to see you smile, and to see you laugh." He smiled at me and tried to kiss me again, but I still wouldn't let him.

"Stop!" I said through giggles.

"What? You don't wanna kiss me?"

"It's not that I don't wanna kiss you! I just wanna finish this conversation first."

He sighed, "Ok."

"Ok. So what I was saying was, I'm just not a very patient person, and I like to know what's going on, because I feel like I don't want to just wait around for something that's never going to happen. I mean I can be patient, if I know I'm actually waiting for something, in the end, but...

"I know what you mean, and I know things seem to be moving kind of slow, but that's just because school started this week for me, and I've got my surgery Thursday..."

"No, no, that's not it. I think the pace is fine, it's not that! I just...I don't want to be your rebound."
He paused as if he was really thinking about what I'd said.

"I...never thought about it that way."

"Well, of course you didn't. And that's exactly why I have to think that way. It's just...I know you recently got out of a relationship, and my last breakup was...messy and confusing, and it took me over a year to get over it, and if you have any residual feelings for your ex, then I just don't want to get in the middle of that. I don't just wanna be that girl that's distracting you from the way you really feel about her."

"Listen, I know I have some stuff to deal with still, but I don't have feelings for her anymore. I mean I'm still upset about what happened, but I've moved on to a new chapter in my life, and I'm looking ahead. She's just driving me crazy because she broke up with me but now she wants me back! And she's saying she regrets everything, and putting all this pressure on me and it's just annoying! I mean I don't understand why she did it in the first place. It's like, 'You broke up with me!'  And you know it's like the first time I was dumped, that's the worst, right?" (He laughed at his own joke there and I smiled), "It's just...bothersome. I don't have feelings for her anymore like that. I'm sorry for making you deal with all my baggage."

"Don't apologize. You're not making me do anything. I wouldn't be here if I didn't wanna be."

And then he leaned in and I let him kiss me, finally. And then we talked, smoked, laughed and played some more. And then I asked him to play me a few songs on the guitar. He's really good too! So hot...and then finally, we had sex. And OMG he is like really, really good in the sex department! I mean last time when he went down on me was...wow, but the sex was...also wow. I mean he is very well endowed first of all, and second he's so...passionate, and uninhibited, and so in sync with me. He's not a selfish lover at all. He's very eager to please. It was amazing. Then we laid there and just talked for like hours! Mostly about music, but about other stuff too. And finally we went to sleep, in each others arms. ((Sigh)) It was wonderful. I really like him. I really feel like this could go somewhere. It all just seems so...effortless.


Tonight I went to dinner and then the improv theater with Sophie to see a couple shows. And guess who I saw there?? Lane. It was only a little bit strange. He looked good. We exchanged "hey how are yous" and that was about it. I wondered what it would be like to date him again, and then I thought of Brazil and just smiled to myself at my good fortune.
Anyway, Sophie and I had a lot of fun. One last hoorah before school starts Monday. Then things are gonna start getting hectic for me again. I hope Brazil and I can still manage to find time to hang out.
So just one question for all my readers out there... Do you believe Brazil? About the ex thing I mean? Or should I be more cautious?

Just Girls!

AHHH! Today was so much fun! I went shopping with 2 girls from school, Katy and Sami. They were both in my photo class last semester. Then we went and ate afterwards. We had such a blast. We were at Nordstrom Rack, and we all picked out really shitteous outfits and made each other pose in them. Then we took photos. I felt like I was 17 again. Although, they are both 19 so maybe that's why. Lol. It might seem a little weird, me hanging out with girls that are almost 10 years my junior, but I am pretty immature for my age. LOL. But it was so nice to just go out and have fun with the girls. I miss doing that! And I got some realllly awesome steals today! I picked up this great pair of Carrera shades which I am now obsessed with (as seen on model below!) and a new pair of cords. So all in all, success!

Brazil texted me earlier, asking if I had any plans tonight. I told him I was shopping with the girls, but no plans later. He hasn't responded, but he's still in class for another...30 minutes? So we'll see if I hear from him again. I actually haven't seen him since that night he came over. We just keep missing each other I guess. But he's going to the hospital surgery to have a sound wave shock treatment done to one of his kidneys (he has kidney stones) so he said next week he would be taking it easy, and recovering, and that he should have plenty of time so we can "do something". Whatever that means. We shall see...
I gave my number to another really hot guy that came into the bar Saturday night. I mean really hot. Like maybe even too hot to not be a huge douche. But then he actually texted me! Like only two hours after I gave him my number!! So we texted back and forth a little bit, and basically came to the conclusion that we have completely opposite schedules and will never see each other again. Lol. Unless I get a Friday or Saturday night off. And I don't see that happening any time soon... ((Sigh)) Oh well. At least I'm putting myself out there. I guess all it takes is a little bit of flirting and a little bit of confidence. Guys dig that shit. Well I gotta go practice piano now. Toodles!

No Place To Sleep

**WARNING** This post contains many capital letters and expletives. 

So after much deliberation, you have all convinced me not to reach out to Melissa. And I agree, it's best to just leave it alone. It's not like I want to rekindle our friendship or anything, and she was a shitty friend. So I'm not going to contact her.
In other news, I had a couple of house guests since Wednesday night. One of my oldest (literally the friend I've known longer than all my other friends!) friends and her boyfriend came to stay. Margaret and Joseph. They are both in their last semester of medical school and were in town for residency interviews. I had only met Joseph once before, but he's a lot of fun, and I really like him. When I was in Houston over Christmas, I saw Margaret at church and she mentioned that she would be in Chicago in January and I told her she could stay with me. But I didn't find out till the day before they got here that they were coming. So anyway, I met them at the airport Wednesday afternoon, and then we went out to dinner, and I took them to the improv theater for a show. It was a lot of fun! I took the couch upstairs, and gave them my room for the weekend. Luckily I had just cleaned my room and changed my sheets, so it was a pretty no-stress situation. Until last night that is...
I informed both of my roommates, that I had company staying till Saturday morning, and that until then, I would be sleeping on the couch in the TV room. I had a bed made up in there, and my pillow and everything. Well then Dane told me in an email that he was having a bunch of people over Friday night. So I wrote back that that was cool, but that I would still be sleeping in the room upstairs, but that I was working Friday night so it probably wouldn't be a big deal. But then I got home last night and there was someone sleeping on the fucking couch!! I was so mad I wanted to scream!! There I was with my pajamas and all my stuff from work and I literally had no place to go! Not to mention the place was a total disaster, complete with food and booze left out, and the furniture dragged every which way apparently to accommodate Dane's large party. So I texted Sophie to see if I could crash with her. No answer. So I texted Abbie. No answer. I was seriously so fucking pissed. Even if I decided to lay down on the fucking table and go to sleep, I had no pillow and no blankets, because Dane had apparently taken my pillow out of the upstairs room, and thrown it back on my bed, and the blankets were being used by the passed out drunk guy. UGHHHH!! It makes me mad all over again thinking about it!
I mean seriously?! I know he owns the condo and all, but I told him I was going to be sleeping in there! That's why I left my pillow! He could have at least texted me that someone was gonna be there so I didn't walk in like, "WTF?" when I got home!
So I went downstairs and grabbed this dirty, stinky old white blanket that Jasper sleeps on when it gets cold, because it was the only thing I could find, and went to sleep on the chair. The non-reclining, really small chair. Luckily I had my sleeping mask in my purse. So I attempted to go to sleep, until about 5am when Dane got up to go to work and set of the FUCKING FIRE ALARM!!!! He's a fucking fire fighter for god's sake, and he keeps the fire alarm sitting on top of the kitchen cabinets NEXT TO THE STOVE!! It says right on the back of the alarm that you're not supposed to keep it in the kitchen, or next to any open flames!! How does he not get this?!?!!
Now I'm really fuckin' pissed. Then at about 7, Dane's stupid, annoying, loud ass fucking girlfriend comes up the stairs and starts having a conversation (i.e. shouting match) with Passed Out Guy literally right behind me. Umm...hELLO?!! Do you not see me here trying to fucking sleep!?!
GOOOOOOOD...


I HATE THEM!!

I FUCKING HATE DANE'S GIRLFRIEND. She has apparently never heard of an "inside voice" because she wakes me up literally every time she sleeps over. And wtf, I'm back in my bed now, because Margaret and Joseph just left, and Dane also threw all the old couch throw pillows on my floor! WHY would he do that?! He couldn't just throw them on the new couch (you know, the one I was supposed to sleep on!?) in the other room??
I'm disgusted. And very disappointed in humanity. And currently accepting new ideas for revenge. Anybody got any ideas??