The Ghost of Christmas Past

Ever since Melissa and her boyfriend broke up, we've become really close. We hang out all the time, and talk on the phone a lot... I mean she's like one of my best friends now! And since we've both been sick, we decided it would be fun to go to a movie today, since we can't go out. We saw Sweeney Todd, which we were surprised to learn was a musical, but we still really enjoyed it. We're huge Depp fans! Afterwards we ate at Friday's and chatted for a while. It's so nice having great girlfriends!

Earlier today I had an interesting conversation with my ex, The Psycho. He had called me a few days ago and left me a message saying Merry Christmas and all that... And I figured since he's in the army, he most likely spent his holidays alone, and it couldn't hurt to call him back and just say hi. And we were having a fine, civil conversation...just chatting about stuff that's neither here nor there. Until he started talking about how he misses me.

"Do you still have feelings for me? Honestly." I asked him.
I heard him sigh, and there was a long pause before he answered.
"Peyton, I have never cared about anyone the way I care about you. I mean, all my other exes are just chicks, but you were never just a chick. I realized too late that you were legit, and you really did love me, but you didn't wanna be with a guy who was gone so..."
"No. You can't say that. The reasons we broke up aren't as a result of you being gone and helpless to the situation. We broke up because our relationship was not healthy. And it would have happened regardless of if you joined the army or not. I mean we could point fingers all day but...it just wasn't meant to be."
"Ok well...you don't have to rub it in. I disagree though. I miss you everyday. And I still love you."
"Well...then can I ask you something? Even if it might make you mad?"
"Sure...go ahead."
"If you love me so much, why did you try to hold me back?? I mean...when we broke up it was like, "Wow! I have friends! I have a life! I can do things!" I mean seriously...and you always picked fights with me over the silliest things, like myspace."
"I don't know Peyton...because I was insecure I guess. It doesn't matter... I was really happy with you, when you wanted me. But now you don't want me, and I'm miserable."

I sighed. I mean, what was I supposed to say to that?? He was a total jerk through our entire relationship!!

So I figured it was probably best to cut our conversation short.
"Well...it was nice talking to you. Don't be a stranger. And take care of yourself, ok?"
"Yea. You too Peyton. Bye."

And that was it. How weird... And yet, nice to know he at least misses me. Why is it that the one person that I would absolutely never be with (again) wants me? But the guys I want (The Model, Todd...) don't want me. Ugh. What is my dysfunction???

Anyways, I totally found The Frenchman on Facebook yesterday and he is SEXY!@!!! Like, I almost freaked! I mean I couldn't view his profile since we're not friends, but I did see his main picture. He's very fit, nice muscular arms, tan skin, dark hair...mmmmm. And he's holding some kind of rifle like he's just been hunting or something. OMG SO HOT! So I wrote my cousin, Noelle and told her how hot I think he is. So I may be going to Louisiana sooner than I'd planned!

Well, it's back to work tomorrow, then Saturday is the photoshoot, and then Monday I fly to Florida for 4 days. I'll most likely update while I'm there cuz Sophie's gonna be working during the day. I still can't believe she's getting married! Crazy...
Well it was great hearing from you guys! Keep writing me!

Mitch Of The Day:
"Cavities are made by sugar. So if you need to dig a hole, then lay down some candy bars!"